Clarity
by HandsThatHeal
Summary: Three years after the plane crash, Callie & Arizona have reconciled their differences & are now happier than ever before. With their relationship now stronger than ever, will the necessary presence of a face from the past tear them apart? Will their marriage stand up to life's latest tragedy or will they find they are in the exact same position they were years before? (Re-Post)
1. Chapter 1

**Title**: Clarity

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: M/NC-17 (For Future Chapters)

**Summary**: Three years after the plane crash, Callie and Arizona have reconciled their differences and are now the happiest they've even been. With their relationship now stronger than ever, will the necessary presence of a face from the past tear them apart? Will their marriage stand up to life's latest tragedy or will they find that they are in the exact same position they were years before?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

**AN: **The first chapter of this story was originally posted to this site a little over a year ago on the premiere date of Season 10 of Grey's Anatomy. Since that time, this story was completed with a sequel entitled _Perfectly Imperfect_ also partially written. I recently took down all of my stories, but have now decided to re-post this story, along with _Perfectly Imperfect_ so it can be completed. My current plan is to post a chapter a day for this story, followed by _Perfectly Imperfect_ until I am caught up to where _Perfectly Imperfect_ ended. I will then post an ALL NEW chapter of _Perfectly Imperfect_, and just go from there until that story is finished.

_Clarity_ is essentially Canon until around episode 10x03 or 10x04, and in this universe, Arizona did not have a miscarriage, nor did she sleep with Leah. I really hope all of this makes sense and, for those of you who haven't already read this story, I hope you enjoy it. For those of you who have read it, thank you so much for all your interest in the stories I write. I also have another NEW FIC in the works that should be posted soon, as well.

* * *

_**Chapter One**_

* * *

**(**_**Callie's POV)**_

_Clarity is. . .a decision. It isn't a matter of luck, but something we create for ourselves. It's not something that arrives from the outside in, but instead from the darkest recesses deep down in our souls. Clarity is what we create for ourselves even in the darkest of times. _

_Even in times of betrayal. _

_They say everyone suffers at least one great betrayal in their lifetime. We've all seen it; betrayal comes in many forms. We read about it in books and watch it unfold on television and in the movies; businessmen out to make that almighty dollar or scheming politicians striving to become the next world leader. Best friends being thrown under the bus for another's personal gain, cheating husbands and wives falling into bed with someone else for reasons we will never in our lives be able to comprehend. _

_We've all suffered through this. Every single one of us has been betrayed by someone outside ourselves; someone has hurt us or been dishonest with us. Someone has broken a promise made and, the more we trust, the greater the betrayal. The more we love, the greater the pain. It hurts to breathe. It hurts to live. We hate the person who has done this to us, but yet, sometimes. . .we simply cannot exist without them. _

_So, we put up walls. We lash out even when we shouldn't. We do anything and everything we can to mask the heartbreak and despair we are feeling, because the worst pain in the world goes way beyond the physical. It's an emotional, deeply seated, all-consuming pain that we feel from the tips of our toes to the tops of our heads. It hurts to the point that we can't even hold ourselves upright, because. . .we aren't bulletproof. We aren't made of steel, and our fragile human hearts were made to be broken. _

_It's a miserable existence; a relentless state of being that we're sure will never end, but at some point in time, we are forced to make a choice. _

_Do we stop living? _

_Do we bury our heads in the ground and forever shy away from the comfort of human contact and affection, or do we stand tall and decide to get back out there? _

_It's a humbling and heart wrenching decision to make, but eventually, some of us decide. . .to be brave. To fight. To come out of this great betrayal better people than we ever were before__. We decide to proceed with clarity, because. . .it makes us stronger. _

_It takes a greater strength of character to rebuild a marriage than to just give up and quit and, that alone, is something to be proud of. It's not for the weak or faint of heart but, in the end, my wife and I realized there were greater rewards in staying together than there were in giving up, because this wasn't how we were supposed to end. There were just too many more chapters of our story left to write. _

_This reconciliation was certainly no easy task. We slipped. We faltered. We lost. We broke. We healed. _

_And eventually, we chose. . .to love. Because love comes to those who still hope, even in the face of disappointment. _

_Love belongs to those who still choose to do it, even when we've been hurt before. _

* * *

**(**_**Flashback)**_

_"Okay, Sofia," Arizona said as she handed the four-year-old a red rose from the bouquet she held in her hand. "You know what you've got to do, right?"_

_The miniature Latina scrunched her face in consternation as she huffed at her mother. "Of course, momma. We've been practicing this. . .all. . .day. . .long," she stated as she made her way to the front door of the apartment. _

_Arizona shook her head as she watched her daughter make her way to her destination, admiring the tenacity of the little girl she loved so much. Sofia was one hundred percent Calliope Torres' daughter in looks and in the inflection of her voice, but the blonde took great pleasure in the fact that her actions and mannerisms were totally mirrored after her own. _

_Hearing the key turn in the lock, Arizona glanced up from the little girl's back, watching as the door swung open to reveal the object of her affection who now stood casually flicking her thumb across the touchpad of her phone as she attentively read something on the screen. _

_"Welcome home, Mami. We missed you today," Sofia piped up as she tugged on the bottom of Callie's leather jacket._

_Dragging her attention away from her phone and toward the beautiful child standing with a rose held out for her, the elder Latina smiled as she crouched down to her daughter's level. "Why thank you, mija. I missed you today, too," she said as she kissed Sofia's irresistibly chubby cheek. "What's this for?" she asked as she took the proffered flower, dipping her nose into the top of the rose to eagerly inhale its scent. _

_As practiced, Sofia didn't allow her mother to linger, diligently taking her hand to lead her further into the living room. _

_For the first time since she entered the apartment, Callie looked around as Sofia led her across the room, finally spotting Arizona who stood near the fireplace with the remaining eleven roses from the dozen she and Sofia had purchased earlier that day. Upon closer inspection, Callie found the coffee table surrounded by several fluffy pillows where a dinner of pizza, salad, beer, and milk lay waiting. _

_With her eyes now locked with the beautiful cerulean pools she constantly found herself drowning in, a lopsided grin tugged at Callie's lips as she took in the sight; the dimpled grin on Arizona's face causing her heart to melt as she watched her step closer to her and reach out to take her free hand into her own. "These are for you," the blonde stated, offering Callie the remainder of the roses before gently brushing her lips against a tanned cheek. _

_Callie closed her eyes, reveling in the sensation of the smooth lips caressing her face and, turning her head to properly return the kiss, she pouted when she was intercepted by both Arizona and Sofia as they together managed to remove her leather jacket and bags from her shoulders. _

_The vase of all twelve roses now sat in the middle of the coffee table as a beautiful centerpiece for their makeshift dining area and with a slight smirk on her face, Callie allowed Sofia to guide her to her seat on the floor._

_Once they were all three settled onto the pillows, Callie suspiciously glanced between her wife and daughter, noticing for the first time that evening that their hair was styled identically, two perfect French braids winding down the back of each of their heads. _

_"Well, this is nice," the brunette said, kissing the little girl's temple before doing the same to Arizona. "But why do I feel like the two of you are up to something?"_

_Arizona and Sofia both assumed the same innocent look as the blonde served each of them a slice of pizza. _

_"We aren't up to anything, Mami," Sofia stated, pulling a piece of pepperoni from her piece of pizza and stuffing it into her mouth. "We just love you and have something very important we would like to discuss with you," the little girl matter-of-factly continued before loudly sipping her milk through a straw._

_"She gets that from you, you know," Callie stated with a roll of her eyes before taking a drink from her chilled bottle of beer. _

_Arizona only shrugged, smiling brightly as she sunk her teeth into a slice of vegetable supreme pizza. Taking a sip of beer, she then closed her eyes, enjoying the pairing of pizza and amber ale._

_Callie questioningly watched her wife. The other woman was definitely up to something, that much was for sure but, as she continued to study her as she ate, she couldn't help but stare; Arizona had always been one of those people who made anything and everything she ate or drank look amazing. _

_"So, are either of you going to fill me in on this important thing we need to discuss?" the brunette soon asked after witnessing her wife thoroughly enjoy another bite. _

_Sofia looked toward Arizona and, upon receiving a nod from her mother, she stood from her seat, animatedly moving her hands as she spoke. "Momma and I have been thinking. . ." she enthusiastically began, trailing off to once again look toward the blonde for encouragement._

_"Uh-huh?" Callie skeptically urged as she glanced between Frick and Frack who clearly had this little routine extremely well planned and flawlessly rehearsed. _

_"We're going to be moving soon, and our new house is really 'ginormous'!" Sofia excitedly continued, stretching out her arms to her full wingspan to illustrate her point. _

_"It is," the brunette confirmed with a nod of her head._

_Sofia once again glanced toward the blonde who smiled lovingly before pulling the little girl to sit on her lap. "Keep going, big girl. You're doing great," Arizona insisted as she wrapped her arms around her daughter to hold her close._

_The child leaned back against Arizona's chest, a smile that was identical to Callie's lighting her face. "So, momma and I definitely think it's way too 'huger' for just the three of us."_

_"Huge, mija. Not 'huger'," Callie gently corrected, reaching out to brush raven bangs back from her daughter's cherubic face. Then taking a sip from her bottle of beer, she then shrugged. "So what do you want, sweetie? A kitten? Maybe a puppy? Did your momma put you up to asking for chickens? Again?"_

_Arizona looked down at Sofia who stared up at her with a toothy super magic smile before turning her attention toward her genuinely confused wife. "No, Calliope. Not a kitten. Or a dog. And no chickens. Not yet, at least," she honestly replied before clearing her throat. _

_Callie's eyes narrowed in confusion, her lips pursing in question as she tried to anticipate what exactly the two were getting at._

_"We don't want any pets, Calliope, but what we do want, what I want, more than anything is. . .another baby."_

* * *

_**(Arizona's POV)**_

_It's not easy to forgive and forget when someone breaks our trust. The reality is, it takes time and effort to be able to restore trust, especially when we've been betrayed by the person we love most in the world. _

_It takes courage to acknowledge how we feel and once we've done that, willingness from the other person to hear and honor it. It takes a mutual commitment to move beyond what happened, otherwise we are destined for failure, destined to relive that horrible, life changing moment over and over again._

_It's important to realize we can't shove the act - no matter what it may have been - away in a vault and lock it up. Regaining trust takes determination. It takes patience. A lot of courage and inner strength. It takes time for both the betrayed and the betrayer to heal, to regain balance, and to find the clarity necessary in a world that has become nothing more than a fog, a haze of confusion, uncertainty, and despair._

_I remember the moment that happened for me. The moment everything became so clear, the very second I decided to find the clarity I had so desperately been missing in my marriage and in my family. _

_In the blink of an eye, I realized I needed help; we both needed help. I knew without a doubt we couldn't make it alone. We needed guidance in a world where we'd lost our way and, when we both decided to lean into that truth, we began to really work together for the first time in far too long. _

_Making the decision to stay together and remain in our marriage was a huge step and a choice that was not taken lightly. At times, staying together seemed like the only thing we could possibly choose to do, but then, on other days, it became too difficult and too painful to bear. _

_We needed to forgive, but not to forget. We needed to be strong for ourselves and for each other. We needed to understand and free ourselves of all the hurt and all the pain we'd caused one another, and I can honestly say it was the hardest thing either of us has ever had to endure. _

_But. . .we did it. For ourselves. For our little girl. For all the hopes and all dreams we still shared. _

_We didn't rush. _

_We needed time and distance, the space necessary for both of us to heal. We had to find out who we were in a world that was so drastically different, because our lives were forever changed. We needed to reconnect with our own selves on the most basic fundamental level in order to determine if we were willing to reconnect with each other and, in the end, we came out better for it. We learned to speak honestly with each other without fear of recourse. To live and to love and to work together. _

_In rebuilding our marriage, we reminisced; we remembered the strengths we had in our relationship and why we chose to be together in the first place while also falling in love all over again with our new and improved selves. We became recommitted, reconnected, and when that happened, when we found clarity. . .everything else just fell into place. _

* * *

_**(Present Day)**_

Callie had known her wife for more than six years and been married to her for over four. She'd seen her ecstatically happy and terribly sad. She'd seen her hurt beyond measure and furious beyond compare, but the look she saw on Arizona's face when her foggy brain drifted from the blackness of unconsciousness into the sterile white light of a hospital room, was something she had no words to even attempt to describe.

Watching as Callie slowly came to, Arizona glanced down at the ashen face that usually reflected the most brilliant caramel complexion, her own normally bright blue eyes, dark and sullen. "Hey," she softly called as she took her confused wife's hand into her own.

Callie scrunched her face, blinking her eyes several times, trying to gather herself enough to make words and, when her befuddled mind finally cleared enough for her to realize she was lying in a hospital bed with machines beeping above her head, her eyes immediately snapped open, her hands shooting out to caress and pat at her abdomen.

Feeling that it was flatter than it should be at eight months pregnant, she anxiously looked to her wife for answers.

"She's okay, Calliope. Our little girl is okay," Arizona stated, grasping one of Callie's trembling hands as she leaned both elbows on the edge of the mattress.

Tears immediately sprung to Callie's eyes before dripping down the sides of her face. She strongly clutched Arizona's hand, sensing from the dread she saw on her every feature that she was desperately going to need it for support. "But?" she asked, her tone hoarse and her throat burning with the effort of voicing such a simple word.

Arizona cleared her throat, her troubled blue eyes glancing around the room before once again landing on her wife's overwrought face. "She. . ." Arizona trailed off, her chest rising with a deep breath before she blew it out through her nose. "You were umm. . .preeclamptic. I, uh. . .Sofia and I came home, and I. . .found you on the bedroom floor. It was. . ." she once again hesitated; she was wholly unable to finish her statement as the tears that had been brimming in her eyes finally spilled forth and dripped from her cheeks to land on Callie's arm.

Callie closed her eyes, desperately trying to remember anything involving what Arizona had just said though, at this point in time, she was drawing a complete blank.

Finding only a molecule of resolve, Arizona wiped at her cheeks, desperately trying to gather herself. "So, we had to take her by emergency cesarean. Addison couldn't get here in time, so I made Alex and Bailey do it. I. . .she's okay, Callie. She's strong. Four pounds, eight ounces of strong."

Arizona flinched at her own words; this entire situation was far too familiar and, the feelings and emotions she had experienced during Sofia's untimely birth combined with the events of the day quickly came flooding back, completely overwhelming her. "She has brown eyes and beautiful black hair, Calliope. So much like Sofia. She's jaundice, but that should clear. Lungs are weak, but that's to be expected for a baby born at thirty-four weeks. We administered steroids. She's going to have to stay in the NICU."

Callie could tell her wife wasn't giving her all the information and, as she stared into Arizona's hardening eyes, she felt herself become more and more frightened. She could tell her wife was beginning to shut down, the words she was saying sounding more and more like those of a doctor than a woman who had just become a mother for the second time.

The brunette momentarily watched Arizona breathe deeply and divert her gaze before reaching out with an unsteady hand to lay it against an ivory cheek, turning a blonde head slightly so her wife was forced to look in her direction. "I need you to be honest with me, Arizona. Please. I need you to tell me what's wrong with Olivia."

* * *

_**(Arizona's POV)**_

_Every parent has a vision of their child before we actually get to meet them. Usually it's a bouncing baby boy or girl who is happy and healthy, a smiling and laughing little bundle of joy that brings happiness to the hearts and souls of everyone around them. _

_No parent ever wants to envision that the worst will happen, that our child will be born with defects or abnormalities that could forever alter their path through life. But, when that does happen, we are forced to make a choice. Because being a parent is so much more than just becoming one. . ._

* * *

_**(Callie's POV)**_

_It's an endless journey, not just a destination, and we quickly realize what we are willing to do for this new human life is. . .immeasurable. _

_We've been given this other person to mold and to love, and it's the scariest thing we will ever have to face because when they hurt, we do, too. But, we are also given the incredible opportunity of sharing in their happiness, their excitement and their fears, sharing in the most amazing moments, but also in the very worst. _

_So, what are we to do when the pretty pink bubble of babies and joy and happiness we've been floating in. . .pops? How should we react when that little bundle of joy is born differently than we could ever have imagined? What do we do? How do we move past the feelings of guilt and fear, jealousy and despair?_

_For a brief moment, we can fight it; we can run, and we can hide. We can pretend it doesn't exist but, once we're able to see past our initial confusion and denial, we once again have to make a choice. _

_We have to push through for the love of that child and do anything and everything in our power to make sure she is going to be okay. . ._

* * *

_**(Arizona's POV)**_

_We have to be more selfless than we've ever been, perhaps even at the cost of everything we've painstakingly worked to achieve. _

_There is no thinking or hesitation. No worrying what the backlash may be, as long as our child is given every possible opportunity to live an abundantly happy life. As a parent, we don't question any negative recourse as long as we're able to make all of our child's pain and all of their heartache go away. _

_We simply have to look past all the repercussions in order to find the way. We have to fight against the tragedy in order to find the remedy. _

_We have to find our way through the obscurity of darkness to find clarity in the light. . ._

* * *

_**(Shared POV)**_

_And hope like hell that our past mistakes can hurt us no more. . ._


	2. Chapter 2

**Title**: Clarity

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: M/NC-17 (For Future Chapters)

**Summary**: Three years after the plane crash, Callie and Arizona have reconciled their differences and are now the happiest they've even been. With their relationship now stronger than ever, will the necessary presence of a face from the past tear them apart? Will their marriage stand up to life's latest tragedy or will they find that they are in the exact same position they were years before?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Two**_

* * *

Callie stared out ahead of her, her sullen eyes blankly looking at nothing in particular as Arizona pushed her wheelchair closer and closer to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit of Grey+Sloan Memorial Hospital.

The brunette couldn't believe this was happening again; she'd made this exact same journey five years prior and, she currently was no more prepared this time than she was the time before.

She felt terrible. Her stomach churned, and her head ached; her entire body felt heavy and fatigued. She was anxious to meet her brand new baby girl but, as her heart pounded deafeningly in her ears, she swallowed hard, sure she was about to empty the contents of her stomach all over herself and onto the hospital's institutional tiled floor.

Moving her arms as quickly as she possibly could, she harshly gripped the padded arms of the wheelchair, clenching her eyes shut in a desperate attempt to force the world to stop spinning around her. Feeling the bile rise in her throat, she swallowed hard before somehow managing to speak. "Stop, Arizona. Please. Just. . .wait," she pleaded, her voice only loud enough for her wife to hear as her throat constricted with nausea and panic. "Just. . .just a sec. . ."

Arizona immediately halted their forward movement, one hand coming to rest on her wife's shoulder who immediately reached up to grasp at it for support.

Arizona then leaned forward, wrapping her free arm around the brunette's chest as her lips came to rest near her ear. "It's okay, Callie. I'm here. I've got you," she softly spoke before resting her own cheek against a clammy one as she continued to tightly hold on to her wife. "I'm here, and I'm not going to let anything happen to you. . ._or_ Olivia. Okay?" she spoke, hoping her gentle mantra would help calm her wife's tumultuous nerves.

Callie gasped for air, the deep pressure of Arizona's hug and the unwavering certainty she heard in her voice doing little to comfort her. "I. . .she. . .I'm scared, Arizona. I want to see her so much, but I-I'm scared."

Without losing contact with Callie's upper body, Arizona stepped to the side of the chair so she could make eye contact with her wife and, forcing the crying brunette to look at her with a gentle hand, she sighed. "There's nothing to be afraid of. Olivia _looks_ perfect. There's a hat on her head. There are all the usual tubes and wires, but she's. . .she's beautiful, Calliope. Beautiful."

Callie anxiously searched Arizona's eyes and, finding nothing but complete honesty in those cerulean depths, she reached out, pulling her wife into a clinging embrace as she took her time to gather the strength she was certain she was going to need.

Arizona whispered reassurances into Callie's ear, continuing to hold her as she breathed deeply; inhaling in through her nose and then exhaling out through her mouth and, when she felt her wife's breathing return to a normal rate and speed, she gently kissed her cheek though she continued to hold her close. "You ready now?" Arizona asked without any intention of letting her go.

Callie opened her mouth to speak but, finding that her throat had gone completely dry, she only nodded her head, leaning her face more firmly into her wife's.

When the brunette finally seemed to relax, Arizona slowly stood back up before once again gripping the handles of the wheelchair to navigate it the remaining distance.

After donning pink isolation gowns, they entered the eerily quiet room, dark brown eyes quickly scanning the area in search of her new little bundle of joy. As movement to her left caught her attention, Callie's eyes worriedly landed on an incubator surrounded by Doctors Alex Karev, Addison Montgomery, and Derek Shepherd. Certain that had to be the one, she sighed as Arizona moved them in that direction.

"So far, her skull has compensated for the growth of her brain, but as she grows, her head will become more and more misshapen. Increased intracranial pressure caused the seizure, but the Mannitol and hyperventilation should manage the symptoms. The coronal suture. . ."

A hand on his arm and the clearing of a throat behind him halted Derek Shepherd in midsentence and, turning around, his already tired features appeared even more exhausted when he saw the look on Callie's face. Quickly composing himself, he managed a slight smile as he looked between the blonde and the brunette before stepping aside so Callie could get her very first look at the child who had grown within her body for the past eight months.

As she scanned the clear plastic of the incubator walls, a choked breath left Callie's throat at her first glimpse of the new baby girl who lay with a pink beanie atop her head, various tubes and wires connected to her minute form. A worried, but relieved smile tugged at her lips even as tears began to streak down her face, a trembling hand quickly reaching into the infant warmer's hand hole to caress a miniature arm.

Leaning down, Arizona kissed Callie's temple, blue and brown eyes never leaving the baby's angelic face. "I told you she was beautiful," the blonde stated, wrapping her arms around her wife from behind.

"She's gorgeous, Arizona," Callie softly spoke, her voice cracking through her tears and, as the other doctors standing above them continued to talk, Callie and Arizona felt the rest of the world fade around them, their only focus now the tiny life lying before them.

They found themselves mesmerized; Olivia was breathtaking, just as miraculous as Sofia, but unfortunately, they were both very aware that looks could be so very deceiving. She was their baby, though; a new little life for them to love and to cherish and, though their minds raced with thoughts of what needed to be done, the sight of their daughter was enough to give them hope.

* * *

_**(Flashback: One Year Ago)**_

_Sitting down on the side of the bed with her back to her wife, Arizona slipped off her prosthesis, leaning it against the wall as she dropped the white cotton sleeve to the floor. _

_Swinging her lower half onto the mattress, she then pulled the blankets up over her legs, diligently folding over the top of the sheet to rest on her lap. Glancing sidelong to her right, she sighed as she watched Callie continue to read through the People Magazine she held in her hands._

_This was crazy. _

_Callie's silence was killing her. _

_The brunette had said very little since she and Sofia had admittedly bombarded her with the news of their want for another child, insisting they talk of Sofia's antics in day care instead. _

_While Callie did later relent that they would talk about the possibility of a new baby later that evening, she had mentioned nothing more on the subject since. _

_Scanning her wife's profile, Arizona only allowed her to remain silent for a moment longer before wrenching the magazine from her hands and tossing it over the side of the bed. "I know I probably shouldn't have brought it up in front of Sofia, but she asked me the other day if she could have a baby brother or sister and, ever since then, that's all I've been able to think about."_

_Callie didn't turn toward her wife, nor did she speak, choosing instead to gaze downward to where her hands were now clasped together and resting in her lap. Clearing her throat, she then sighed before drawing her bottom lip into her mouth as she continued to listen to Arizona speak._

_"You should have seen her today. She was so cute helping me get everything ready for dinner. She picked the roses out herself and even insisted we have your favorite pizza. She's just so amazing, Callie. So smart and so beautiful. She's headstrong and has such a wonderful personality, and it would be such a shame to not try to duplicate that."_

_The brunette's head remained bent, the tips of her right thumbs and fingers absentmindedly toying with the wedding ring on her left hand._

_"Are you really just going to sit there?" Arizona then asked, her tone full of exasperation. "You promised we'd talk about this later, Calliope, and now is later, so. . .can we talk about this? Can we have a conversation?"_

_"Yes," Callie finally answered, her head popping up and turning in her wife's direction._

_Arizona immediately halted in her rambled speech, questioningly searching Callie's face. "Yes, what?" she asked, scrunching her brow in confusion. "Yes, we can have a conversation? Yes, now is later? Yes. . ."_

_"Yes, to all of it," she softly admitted. "But mostly, yes. . .we can have another baby."_

_A shocked, but ecstatic grin slowly worked its way onto pink lips. "Really?" Arizona asked, her crooked grin soon morphing into a full-blown super magic smile._

_"Really, Arizona!" Callie exclaimed, completely unable to keep up the indifferent charade she'd been exuding or to contain her happiness for a moment longer. "I absolutely want to have another baby with you."_

_Arizona leaned forward, her lips immediately attaching to plump ones in a hard kiss as she harshly tugged at the front of Callie's shirt to pull her impossibly closer to her. But pulling back much too soon for Callie's liking, the blonde quickly began to ramble. "This is awesome! Sofia will be such an amazing big sister and, if it's okay with you, I'd really like you to carry this baby, too. Neither of us is by any means old, but you are younger than me, a-a-and I know we've never really discussed this, but it's very important to me that Sofia have a biological sibling. Not for any reason other than possible medical issues, but really, why mess with perfection, anyway? You know?" she coyly added as she leaned over the side of the mattress to grab a blue binder from beneath the bed. "I was really, really hoping you'd say yes, so I've done some research. We can. . ."_

_"Arizona, please. Take a breath," Callie interrupted with a chuckle. "Just slow down."_

_Taking her eyes off the information she held in her hands, the blonde tipped her head to the side, sheepishly regarding her smiling wife. "It's just. . .we didn't do it this way the first time around, and I want to be prepared for anything and everything. I want us to do the necessary research so we can make intelligent decisions. I want to have all the facts so when we're ready, we'll know."_

_Callie tilted her own head to the side to meet her wife's sparkling azure gaze and, grasping two ivory hands, she leaned forward to gently caress Arizona's lips with her own. Pulling back only slightly, she spoke against moist lips. "Trust me, sweetie. We'll be ready, and we'll know."_

* * *

Two hours after Callie had been wheeled into the NICU to meet Olivia for the very first time, Arizona now sat alone with their daughter, ivory fingers gently caressing the darker caramel skin of the baby's hand. "Hey there, Olivia. Remember me? We met earlier. I'm your momma. I'm the one who's been talking to you nonstop for the past eight months," she softly cooed as she ran the pad of her thumb over a tiny fist. "Your Mami wanted to stay longer, but she's not feeling so great today, baby girl. She's had a pretty rough day, so Dr. Montgomery took her back to her room to nap with your big sister, Sofia. You haven't met Sofia yet, but you just wait. She's the best. . .and you're already so much like her. I'm so in trouble when it comes to you, your Mami, and your sister. There's no way I'm ever going to be able to resist those magical brown eyes the three of you have."

Arizona paused in her soothing monologue and, as if on cue, tiny squinted eyes opened to reveal beautiful chocolate irises before once again falling shut. "A few years ago, I told your Mami I didn't want to have babies, but then your sister was born, and my entire world changed. From the moment I heard her tiny little heartbeat, I realized I'd been so very wrong. And now, I have _you_, and I have Sofia, and I have absolutely no idea what I'd do without either of you," she softly spoke as she watched the baby's chest rise and fall with every breath.

"I'm so sorry, Olivia. I feel like this is all my fault. I should have seen something on your ultrasounds or taken better care of your Mami. I should have done more. . ." Arizona trailed off as the tears she'd desperately been trying to hold back brimmed in her eyes, threatening to spill forth down her cheeks. "I'm not sure why stuff like this keeps happening to your Mami and me, kiddo. Just when things start looking up for us, something else happens. But, you know what? I've had enough. This is where I draw the line," she choked out, smiling through her tears when Olivia's hand grasped her finger and held on. "I know things seem pretty rotten right now, but don't worry, baby girl. We're going to get through this. I've already started making plans, and your Mami and I are going to do everything in our power to make sure this all turns out okay. You're going to be the one thing your mom and I get right the first time around. You're our light. . ." Arizona paused again, wiping at her face that was now wet with moisture. "I love you _so_ much, Olivia. You, Sofia, and your Mami are my entire world, and I'm not going to let anything else happen to my girls."

* * *

_**(Flashback: Seven Months Ago)**_

_Arizona sat on the playroom floor of the new house she had now shared with her wife and daughter for the past four months, softly encouraging Sofia to practice writing her name. "Nice job, little miss. Let's go over it one more time," she encouraged as she tapped a pencil against the page._

_The little girl smiled as she once again began printing her name across the widely ruled paper, her tongue peeking out from between her lips as she proceeded with the utmost concentration. "S-O-F-I-A. . .T-O-R-R-E-S," she spoke as she meticulously crafted letter after letter in a large, bubbly font. _

_Momentarily inspecting her work, she then looked up at her mother with a satisfied toothy grin._

_Arizona couldn't help but return her daughter's smile with a proud one of her own as she held up the sheet for closer inspection. "You're so going to kick Kindergarten's butt, big girl," she teased before leaning forward to wrap her arms around Sofia. "This looks amazing!"_

_Sofia giggled as Arizona began to tickle her ribs, kicking and squealing in an attempt to evade her mother's wandering hands. "Momma! Stop! Please! That tickles!" she giddily exclaimed, her breathless pleas only causing Arizona to further amp up her joyous assault._

_Stepping into the room's doorway, Callie smiled as she watched her two favorite people in the entire world happily wrestling. She absolutely couldn't get enough of the mere sight of her wife and daughter doing anything together and couldn't help but chuckle softly when the small chair Arizona was seated upon suddenly tipped backward, the blonde's arms flailing at her sides before her back hit the floor with Sofia rambunctiously landing in a heap on top of her._

_"Gotcha, momma!" the child happily exclaimed as she began to return the tickle treatment on her mother whose boisterous laughter filled the room as small hands went to work at her sides._

_"How's the handwriting coming along?" Callie interrupted as she made her way further into the brightly painted playroom to pick up the toppled chair and set it back on four legs._

_Sofia immediately bounced off her mother when she heard Callie enter the room and, quickly grabbing her previously discarded paper, she excitedly held it up for her Mami's inspection. _

_Taking the thin sheet from her daughter's insistent hand, the elder Latina scanned it, pursing her lips in concentration. "Hmm. . ." she began, her index finger tracing over the penciled letters that looked unmistakably like a juvenile version of her own handwriting. Smiling, she returned the paper to waiting hands. "Looks perfect, big girl. Kindergarten won't know what hit it!"_

_"Yay!" Sofia exclaimed before jumping up into Callie's arms nearly knocking her over._

_Finding her footing, the brunette reached out to help her wife up off the floor. "I need to run to the store to grab some things for tomorrow. I told the teachers I'd make Bruschetta for Italian Day at day care. You girls want to join me?" she asked, setting Sofia back down onto the floor._

_Arizona stood up, straightening her disheveled clothing. "What do you think, little miss? You want to go with Mami?" she asked, leaning over to tidy the mess of pencils, paper, and markers that haphazardly lay strewn across the small table in the middle of the playroom._

_Sofia seemed to ponder her mother's question, but a mischievous smile quickly found its way onto her face. "Can we get ice cream, too?"_

_Arizona looked toward Callie in question. "What do you think, Mami? Can we get ice cream, too?"_

_Callie rolled her eyes at her wife and daughter who both stood with their bottom lips protruding in identical and ridiculously cute little pouts. Shaking her head at the sight, she let out an exaggerated sigh. "How can I possibly say no to either of you when you look at me like that?"_

* * *

_A half hour later, Callie navigated their Lexus SUV into the market's parking lot, her eyes scanning the area for an available parking space as Sofia loudly sang 'Let It Go' from the backseat. _

_Glancing left and then right, the brunette finally saw just what she was looking for._

_"There's one, Callie," Arizona informed from the passenger's seat, pointing to the left, though Callie quickly turned the vehicle right._

_"This one's good," the brunette replied as she removed the keys from the ignition and unfastened her seatbelt._

_Arizona reached across her body to do the same, but glancing out the front window, a parking sign in front of her caught her attention._

_STORK PARKING - FOR NEW AND EXPECTANT MOTHERS_

_Straightening up in her seat, the blonde glanced across the car toward her wife. "You can't park here, Callie," she contended, turning to the rear of the car to make sure Sofia was still securely latched in her booster seat._

_A megawatt smile lit the brunette's features as she took in the confused look on Arizona's face. Opening her door, she quickly exited the car, but turning back around, she greeted her wife with a mischievous wink. "Actually, Arizona. . .I can park here."_

* * *

Arizona wearily trudged through the halls of the hospital, making her way from the NICU toward Callie's room. Entering the elevator, she pressed the button necessary to get her to her wife's floor before stepping back to lean against the wall, her eyes falling shut as she let out a defeated breath.

She was exhausted; the kind of fatigue that she could feel deep down in her bones as if she hadn't slept in weeks, and the worst of it was that she knew this feeling was most likely only going to get worse.

Shaking her head, she opened her eyes when the bell alerted her that the lift had carried her to her destination, and she soon found herself standing directly outside Callie's room. Peering in through the window's glass, she noted that her wife wasn't sleeping like she should have been, her watery brown eyes instead gazing off to the side of the room as her left hand errantly stroked the hair at the top of a sleeping Sofia's head.

Needing to be as composed as possible before she spoke with her wife, Arizona momentarily stood outside the door, intently watching Sofia's chest rise and fall as she napped. Breathing deeply, she laboriously plastered a smile on her face before finally stepping into the room.

Callie's head immediately turned upon seeing movement outside the door, her free hand quickly wiping the remnants of fallen tears from her ashen face. "How is she?" she softly asked as she watched Arizona take the seat next to her bed.

The blonde nodded her head as she rubbed her hands up and down her denim clad thighs, her smile faltering slightly at the despondent look in her wife's eyes. "She's good. No change, but she's good. She's sleeping," she disjointedly replied as she pulled the blanket down to cover one of Sofia's legs that had escaped its warmth. "She reminds me so much of Sofia, Callie," she added as an afterthought in an attempt to somehow lighten the mood.

Sighing, Callie adjusted herself, wincing slightly at the twinge of pain she felt in her abdomen along the line of her new surgical incision.

Once she found a more comfortable position, she searched Arizona's face, their eyes locking as she did. "I keep going over and over in my head where I went wrong. I tried so hard. I didn't want to repeat what happened with Sofia. I-I-I was so careful. No caffeine. No junk food. I took it as easy at work as I possibly could. I even drank your terrible kale and apple juice smoothies every single morning, Arizona, but yet. . ." she trailed off, her entire body beginning to shake as she allowed herself to dissolve into an unrelenting fit of tears.

Arizona immediately stood up, leaning down to gather the broken woman into her arms, careful not to jostle the sleeping child at her side. "You didn't do anything wrong. You did everything right. _We_ did everything right. This was out of our control, we. . ."

"I'm so tired of things being out of our control!" the brunette instantly spat in anger and fatigue, though she continued to cling to her wife who staunchly refused to let her go.

"I know, baby. I know," Arizona tried to soothe, though her voice cracked as she spoke.

"Why does this always happen to us? Why? Why can't I ever get anything right? Why does everything always have to be so fucking hard? Why do I always screw everything up?" she cried, her sadness and despair completely melting away the filter between her brain and her mouth, causing her to curse in front of their thankfully sleeping five-year-old. "I just want us to be happy, Arizona. That's all I've ever wanted. . ."

Arizona found herself at a complete loss for words; that was all she'd ever wanted as well but, for some reason, happiness never came easy for them. There was always an uphill battle they had to fight against and, with tears in her eyes and her heart breaking at the sight of her wife in such anguish and torment, she said the only thing she possibly could. "Olivia's going to be fine, Calliope. I need you to believe me when I tell you that," she earnestly insisted as she pulled back to quickly wipe at her dampened face before leaning back in to hold her sobbing wife. "I'm going to make sure nothing happens to her. I'm going to fix this, and I'm going to make sure she's happy and healthy. I'm not going to let anything happen to our girl."

Arizona's words only made Callie cry harder, her tears wetting Arizona's sweater as she sobbed into her shoulder. This was so much like her wife; she always attempted to bear all the hurt and all the pain while trying to make things right but, unfortunately, she knew that in this instance, Arizona's steadfast persistence wasn't going to be enough.

"We can't hide from this, Arizona. You know what that's done to us in the past. We can't just pretend everything's going to be alright. We can't. . ."

The blonde pulled back so she could look into tearful brown eyes. "I know that, Callie. . .I know. But, I mean it when I tell you we're going to figure this out. We're going to talk about it and research and make all the right decisions, and we're going to do it together. We're going to speak with the best surgeons we can find, and we're going to be honest with each other so we can do what's right for our baby."

Callie fearfully searched Arizona's face and, finding nothing but sheer determination, love, and devotion written across her every feature, she felt a calm suddenly fill her soul. Wiping at her eyes, she cleared her throat as she squeezed her wife's hand. "I'm so scared, Arizona. Not just about the baby, but about. . ._us_. We. . .we're. . ."

"We're going to be just fine," Arizona quickly interrupted, not wanting to even consider the toll or the negative repercussions this latest tragedy could potentially have on their marriage. "We learned our lesson a long time ago, and we can do this. We're stronger than we've ever been, and I have faith in us," she insisted as she held tightly to tanned hands. "Don't you?"

Worried brown eyes quickly met questioning blue and, with a nod of her head, Callie earnestly spoke. "Of course I have faith in us, Arizona. I'm just so emotional and confused. I can't even think clearly enough to figure out what we need to do. Where do we even start? How long do you think we should wait until her first surgery?"

Realizing that this conversation needed to be had sooner rather than later, Arizona was hesitant due to Callie's current state but, with a sigh, she finally relented that now was probably as good a time as any.

"We'll have to talk with everyone involved, but I think we should schedule the first surgery for a couple weeks from now. Her brain is going to continue to grow, and we need to give it some room to prevent any more seizures or further malformation of her skull," Arizona quietly informed, her eyes never straying from the brown ones staring back at her.

"So who do we need? Neurosurgery, Peds, Ophthalmology. . ." Callie asked, her attention quickly transitioning from her initial despair to focus on the very important task at hand.

Arizona worried her bottom lip between her teeth as she considered her words. "Alex and Derek wouldn't let me near Olivia when she was first delivered, and while Bailey was finishing up with you, I immediately started doing some research. I just couldn't sit and do nothing, you know? I just. . .I had to have _something_ to do," she worriedly explained as a tear escaped her eye. "And yes, we'll need all of those specialties, but what's most important is deciding exactly _who_ we want. We need to agree on whom to contact."

"I want the very best, Arizona. Nothing but the best," Callie quickly insisted, once again wiping at her cheeks. "And if we can't get the best of the best here at this hospital, then we'll get them from somewhere else."

Arizona's exhausted blue eyes immediately fell to their joined hands upon hearing Callie's words, her thumb fidgeting with the wedding band encircling her wife's left ring finger.

Looking back up at the woman she loved, she smiled a watery smile. "Derek is clearly the best neurosurgeon, and I've taught Alex everything I know, so as long as it's okay with you, I'd really like for them to continue with Olivia's care."

Callie nodded her head. "Of course, Arizona," she agreed as she watched her wife's eyes once again fall to the ring she proudly wore on her left hand. "We'll have anyone and everyone we need on standby just in case. I don't care how much it costs or who we have to get. Whatever or whoever we need, we're going to find, because I'm not going to let anything happen to her, Arizona. I just can't," she continued, her determination gradually shining through.

Arizona once again smiled at her wife, happy to see the despondency she'd been greeted with upon entering her room quickly beginning to fade away, making way for that fierce and tenacious perseverance she'd fallen in love with years before.

Callie was about to return her wife's smile with one of her own, but just before she could, Arizona once again looked down at their joined hands.

Reaching out to tuck back stray hair that had escaped the blonde's messy ponytail, Callie's face fell. "What else, Arizona. What aren't you telling me?" she softly asked, causing misty blue eyes to flick back up to meet her own.

"We, uh. . .we're going to need another surgeon. The very best. . .and I can make a few calls, but from the research I quickly did today, it looks like she. . ."

"Who?"

Arizona sighed; she couldn't even believe the words were about to come out of her mouth. "Derek and Alex are the best, but we're also going to need the _very_ best. . ."

"Who else, Arizona? Who else do we need?"

Arizona swallowed hard, desperately wanting to run and hide from this harrowing situation they had been presented with. "We. . .we'll need a specialist, Calliope. The very best. . ._craniofacial specialist_ we can find."

Callie flinched upon hearing her wife's response, the little color currently tinting her sallow face, completely draining to nothing more than a sickly grey.

"We need. . ."

"Don't say it, Arizona. Just don't."

"Calliope. . ."

"No, Arizona. Just. . ._no_."


	3. Chapter 3

**Title**: Clarity

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: M/NC-17 (For Future Chapters)

**Summary**: Three years after the plane crash, Callie and Arizona have reconciled their differences and are now the happiest they've even been. With their relationship now stronger than ever, will the necessary presence of a face from the past tear them apart? Will their marriage stand up to life's latest tragedy or will they find that they are in the exact same position they were years before?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Three**_

* * *

_**(Flashback: Two Days Ago)**_

_Arizona entered the beautiful five bedroom American Craftsman Style home she shared with her wife and daughter, her work bag and purse thrown over one shoulder as she held onto Sofia's hand with the other. Sliding her keys into the lock and pushing open the door, she shook her head as she watched the little girl immediately toe off her brightly colored New Balance tennis shoes, her jacket and Doc McStuffins backpack landing with a thud in the middle of the foyer floor before she took off running in the opposite direction._

_"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow down there, little miss," Arizona reproached, hanging her own jacket on a hook near the door. "Give me your jacket. Shoes and backpack up to your room."_

_Sofia's little face scrunched in distaste, but noting the warning look in her mother's eyes, she quickly relented, gathering her things and begrudgingly doing as she was told._

_Smiling in spite of herself as the little girl stomped just a little too loudly up the stairs, Arizona quickly flipped through the mail lying on a table near the door before making her way through the downstairs in search of her wife._

_"Callie?" she called into the quiet house, her brow furrowing when she received no response._

_Making her way up the stairs, Arizona frowned as she suddenly felt goose bumps rise on her arms, and not in a good way. The house was just too eerily quiet, and something deep inside her sensed that things just weren't as they should be. "Calliope?"_

_Once again receiving no response, Arizona pushed open the master bedroom door, her eyes quickly scanning the area for her wife. Not finding her there, she moved down the hall toward the new nursery, hoping to find her in that spot, but once again coming up empty handed, she entered the playroom. "Was Mami in your bedroom, big girl?" Arizona worriedly asked, running her hand through silky raven hair as Sofia sat in a small rocking chair soothing her baby doll to sleep._

_"Nope," she simply replied, mimicking her mother's movements over the doll's synthetic hair._

_Arizona's eyes darted around the room, worry rising more and more in her chest as her stomach began to churn with unexplained fear. "I need you to stay in here. Okay? Make sure your baby has a clean diaper and a bottle."_

_Not thinking anything of her mother's request, Sofia only nodded her head as she went about caring for her doll, paying no mind to the blonde as she made her way out the playroom door._

_Deciding to check the ensuite master bathroom, Arizona sighed as she once again found nothing, though her heart began to pound more rapidly in her ears when she saw what appeared to be one of Callie's black ballet flats lying in a strange position on the opposite side of the bed._

_Slowly moving in that direction, she closed her eyes. _

_She didn't want to look. _

_She didn't want to see what she knew would be there, but blowing out a deep breath, she quickly opened her eyes, her mouth falling agape when she saw Callie lying sprawled on her back, one arm outstretched with her iPhone lying just out of reach of her fingertips, one shoe on and the other lying next to one of her feet. _

_"Callie!" Arizona shrieked, dropping to her knees as two of her fingers immediately attached to her wife's neck to locate her carotid pulse. Finding it to be weak and thready, she grabbed Callie's phone, immediately dialing 9-1-1._

_"I. . .umm. . ." Arizona paused momentarily after hearing the dispatcher's voice on the other end of the line, shaking her head and clearing her throat in an attempt to gather herself. "I need an ambulance to 1540 North West 53rd Street, Seattle. My wife is thirty-six years old and thirty-four weeks pregnant. She's, umm. . .unconscious. Pulse is weak and thready, respirations shallow," she quickly informed, the doctor inside her somehow shining through the fear that was currently consuming her. "Airway is clear. . .but, her neck is rigid," she added, rolling Callie onto her left side. "I'm a doctor. If she. . .if her heart stops, I'm starting compressions."_

_Clicking the phone to speaker, she dropped it to the floor from between her ear and her shoulder, balling her hand into a fist to begin sternal rubs in hope of awakening her wife, her other palm resting against a clammy forehead. "Shit, Calliope. You're burning up," she whispered, blue eyes welling with tears as her fingers once again searched for a pulse. "She's fevered. No response to noxious stimuli," she spoke to the dispatcher._

_"Momma! Mami! I changed Gracie's diaper and fed her a bottle. She's all. . ." Sofia stopped short, the baby doll falling from her grasp, her dark brown eyes going wide upon seeing one of her mothers lying unresponsive on the floor as the other desperately hovered over her._

_Arizona's attention quickly snapped toward the five-year-old, her mind racing as she watched a lone tear slip down a smooth caramel cheek, a round cherubic chin beginning to quiver._

_Begrudgingly leaving her wife's side, the blonde knelt in front of her daughter. "I need you to put on your shoes, big girl. Mami. . .she's sick, and we're going to have to take her to the hospital," she simply explained as she held Sofia's hands in her own._

_The little girl only stood motionless, her face lit with shock and horror. "Momma. . .Mami. . ."_

_The tears Arizona had desperately been trying to hold at bay bounced from her eyelids as she blinked before sliding down her face. "I need you to be a big girl, and go get ready, okay? Put your shoes back on and grab your backpack."_

_Big brown eyes looked over Arizona's shoulder to land on the lifeless form of her other mother and, when they once again found moist bright blue orbs, she nodded her head before running out of the room._

_With a sigh, Arizona watched as her daughter briskly retreated before quickly returning to Callie's side. Leaning an ear next to her mouth, she found her respirations to still be weak, but laying the pads of her fingers to her neck, she gasped when she found no pulse._

_"Damn it!" she muttered as she gently rolled her wife into supine. _

_And with tears now streaming down her face, her voice cracked when she spoke. "Starting compressions. . ."_

* * *

Barbara Robbins peeked her head in through a small crack in her daughter-in-law's hospital room door, her face falling when she saw the dejected look on Callie's face. She and Daniel knew their brand new granddaughter had been born with some complications but, other than that, Arizona hadn't elaborated any further information.

"What are you waiting for, Barbara? Go on in," Daniel insisted when his wife remained motionless outside the wooden barrier.

Barbara sighed, turning toward her sometimes thoughtless and extremely impatient husband. "It's not good, Daniel. I've never seen Callie look like that before."

The generally stoic man's face fell, his brow furrowing as he took in his wife's words. "Of course it's not good, Barbara. Arizona said the baby's going to need surgery," he replied, moving past his wife, knocking as he entered the room.

Sullen brown eyes slowly dragged themselves away from the inanimate spot outside the window to land on her visitors, her lips barely curling in greeting.

"Callie," Barbara sympathetically spoke before quickly moving across the tiled floor to take a seat next to the distraught younger woman's bed.

Large tears immediately collected in Callie's eyes as she took in the sincere concern on her mother-in-law's face and, taking the older woman's proffered hand, she squeezed it tightly as her body began to tremble with a tumultuous round of tears.

Barbara stood from her seat, gathering the brunette into a motherly embrace as Daniel stood silently looking on.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," Callie cried into Barbara's shoulder for so many reasons and for none at all at the very same time.

Another soft knock on the door caused the women to pull apart, Barbara Robbins' heart breaking at the sight of her daughter's dejected and exhausted features, her usually bouncy blonde hair lying limply around her face, her generally sparkling blue eyes, now dark and morose.

Arizona hesitated in the doorway, questioningly regarding her wife who had pleaded with her to leave the room - to give her some time - after she had divulged to her that they may need to consult with Dr. Lauren Boswell on their daughter's condition.

Adamantly refusing to look at her wife, Callie quickly turned her head, once again staring off to the side of the room.

With the tension between her daughter and daughter-in-law not going unnoticed, Barbara crossed the room, taking Arizona by the hand. "Can we see her?" she asked before worriedly glancing back in Callie's direction.

Arizona never took her eyes off her wife's melancholy and angered form, her heart aching and her mind racing as she desperately tried to figure out exactly what Callie was thinking, what she was feeling, and what she could do to bring some relief to this harrowing situation.

When her mother once again squeezed her hand, Arizona finally dragged her attention away from her wife, tears welling in her eyes as Barbara pulled her into a warm embrace. "Come on. She seems like she needs some space," the elder Robbins whispered into her daughter's ear, unsure of exactly what was going on, but certain that something was definitely amiss.

Arizona slowly nodded her head, her eyes once again finding Callie and, with a deep breath, she crossed the room, reaching out to smooth brunette hair back from an unreadable face.

Callie flinched at her wife's gentle touch, empty brown eyes refusing to meet distraught and apprehensive blue.

Arizona sighed, glancing up toward the ceiling as she attempted to fend off her tears before leaning back down to gently lay her lips against Callie's cheek. "Meredith and Derek are taking Sofia home with them for the night. Derek is going to take her to school for us in the morning," she softly informed, her mouth lingering momentarily before she pulled back to look down at her wife's stock still form.

When Callie once again refused to speak or even glance in her direction, the blonde decided to retreat, slowly backing away before turning and motioning for her parents to follow her out the door.

* * *

Once they were all properly gowned and gloved, Arizona led her parents into the NICU, her eyes glancing to the left to seek out the incubator housing her brand new baby girl. "It's that one," she whispered, nodding her head and pointing toward the appropriate tiny human.

Barbara and Daniel made their way toward the little girl; both smiling as they took in the sight of their granddaughter for the very first time. "She's beautiful, Arizona," Barbara commented as she took a seat on a stool next to the clear plastic warmer.

Arizona smiled slightly in agreement as she stepped to the opposite side of her baby, a fair right hand immediately making its way into the hand hole to caress her daughter's arm before reaching up to remove the pink beanie from atop the infant's head.

Standing behind his wife, Daniel grasped at her shoulder when he saw the deformity of his granddaughter's skull, tightly squeezing Barbara's hand as she reached up to hold onto his larger one.

Arizona watched for her parents' reaction and, though they appeared mostly unphased, she could see the concern and fear evident in their respective eyes. "It's called craniosynostosis. . ." she began, glancing up from the innocently sleeping child to regard her own worried parents. "When we're born, we all have joints or sutures in our skulls that allow for us to develop and for our brains to grow," she continued to explain, her palm softly brushing over Olivia's thick raven hair. "Unfortunately though, sometimes. . .sometimes those sutures fuse together sooner than they should. When that happens, the skull can't grow properly, so babies have an irregularly shaped head and abnormal facial features. In some cases, it's associated with an underlying brain abnormality that prevents the brain from growing properly, but that doesn't seem to be the case with Olivia," she said with a sigh before adding, "thank God."

Daniel nodded his head; this was definitely not good, but it didn't seem as grave as he had originally imagined. His daughter _was_ a world renowned Pediatric Surgeon - the best in her field - she had to know people who could fix this without even a second thought. "But, it _can_ be corrected, right?"

Arizona reached her free hand into the incubator to replace the hat on Olivia's head before slowly pulling away. "Umm, yeah. In most cases," she said as she tiredly rubbed her fingers over her own eyes.

Barbara skeptically watched her daughter make some kind of note on the chart hanging near Olivia bed. "You _are_ going to find a surgeon to fix this, right?"

Arizona exhaled as she once again sat down next to her daughter to aimlessly stroke the back of her tiny hand.

Barbara could tell that something was awry; that much was obvious from the chill that blew through Callie's hospital room the moment her daughter entered, the tension so thick she could have cut it with a knife. "What aren't you telling us, Arizona? Why are you acting as if this is the end of the world? Sofia had so much more than this wrong with her when she was born but, right now, you and Callie are both behaving as if there's nothing you can do."

"Mother, please. Not right now," Arizona beseeched, pulling her hand from within the warmth of the baby's bed to stand up. "Not here."

Barbara adamantly shook her head, her own hand entering the incubator for her first touch of smooth baby skin. "Don't _mother_ me, Arizona. This isn't you. This isn't Callie. Why are the two of you acting like enemies instead of family? Why?" she demanded.

Clearing her throat, the blonde felt her heart begin to rapidly thump in her chest as tears relentlessly stung her eyes, her face burning like the crackling embers of a fire. "Because the best surgeon out there, the only person I would trust to fix this. . .is the same surgeon I cheated on my wife with, two years ago."

* * *

_**(Flashback: Two Years Ago)**_

_"I've been picturing you. . .screwing that woman. Over and over again, and I can't. . . think about it or talk about it, anymore. I'm all done with that for now. So, I'm. . .not going into that room," Callie softly, but deliberately informed, her eyes then glancing down Arizona's form. "But I think you should. I think you need to," she added, slightly nodding her head, her eyes hoping her estranged wife would agree._

_Arizona glanced toward the ceiling, her eyes welling with tears as she began to shake her head. "No," she insisted, causing Callie's face to fall. "Please. I really need to talk. I really need you to-to do this," she beseeched._

_Callie glanced away from Arizona, unable to watch the pain flash across her pleading blue eyes. Looking back, she nodded her head, a sad smile pulling at her lips. "I know," she spoke, her voice beginning to crack as her chin quivered. "You wore the red dress and everything. . ."_

_Then, with pain evident in her soulful brown eyes and an apologetic smile on her face, she shrugged slightly, letting out a breath before forcing herself to put one foot in front of the other and walk away from the woman she loved._

_Arizona's mouth fell agape as she watched her wife disappear out the waiting room door, her heart plummeting into the pit of her stomach as moisture stung her eyes._

_"Dr. Robbins?"_

_Arizona jumped, immediately spinning around to regard the person calling her name._

_"Are you and Dr. Torres ready?" the therapist asked, glancing down at the watch adorning her left wrist._

_Arizona ruefully smiled before quickly wiping at her eyes. "I. . .umm. . .I apologize. We're not going to be able to make our session tonight," she informed, hastily leaning over to gather her jacket and purse from the sofa she had been seated upon prior to Callie's arrival._

_The therapist stepped forward, watching as Arizona pushed her arms through the sleeves of her jacket. "Well, just because Dr. Torres is unavailable doesn't mean you and I can't begin," she replied, knowingly watching the internal battle rage within her new client's stormy eyes._

_Arizona shook her head. "No, I think. . .I need her to be here. I really need to talk. . ."_

_"Then you've come to the right place. I'm an excellent listener."_

_The blonde sighed, barely resisting the urge to roll her eyes at the therapist's cheesy sense of humor._

_"Just give it a try," the therapist gently continued. "You never know. It might change your life."_

_Arizona didn't want to do this, at least not alone. She had no desire to be stripped bare by some head shrinker who felt the need to talk to her about some overwhelming and prolonged sense of sadness she perceived in her life. _

_She didn't want to have any intense emotional discussions. _

_She didn't want to cry. _

_She didn't want to succumb to another overwhelmingly angry outburst like she'd shocked herself with on the night she screamed at Callie, admitting to her wife that she wanted to even the score._

_She didn't want to have any part of this. Not without her wife there by her side. Not without Callie with her, right where she belonged_

_But, the dejected and broken look on Callie's face as she left that waiting room just moments ago. . .haunted her. _

_She could see those magical brown eyes she loved so much begging her to do this, pleading with her to do what she needed to do. She could also feel the pain of being without her daughter night after night and, in that instant, Arizona realized this was the only way. The only way to get her family back. The only way to fix her marriage but, more importantly, the only way she could attempt to find the person she used to be, the person she hadn't even realized was missing until the night she succumbed to unknown desires with a woman other than her wife. _

_So, with a deep breath in through her nose that she then exhaled through pursed lips, she draped her purse over her shoulder, nervously smiling as she turned to follow her new therapist through the office door. _

_She needed to find the person who had been stripped from her grasp. _

_She needed to recover the good man in the storm whom she'd left behind in the woods. _

* * *

_**Callie's POV**_

_It's been a long time since I've felt so helpless and insecure, since I felt like I wasn't in control of my own life. _

_It's been a long time since I've had to question. . .what did I do wrong?_

_That's how I feel right now with my baby girl lying in the NICU, and my wife and I attempting to put together a team of surgeons necessary to save her life. _

_I feel confused._

_I feel empty. _

_I feel enraged. _

_I feel embarrassed. _

_I feel alone. _

_It's been so long since I've experienced so many emotions all bottled up into one and, thinking back, the last time I felt this way was the night I discovered another woman wearing my wife's scrub top with her wedding ring pinned to it, shining proudly for all to see._

_What did I do wrong? _

_That was my initial thought on that stormy night, the fateful night I found out my wife had fallen into bed with another woman. Suddenly, everything I was, was wrong. Every aspect of myself was something I wanted to peel off and throw on the floor behind me and, the person I was before, the person who was blissfully unaware of my wife's unhappiness, was suddenly both enviable and laughable._

_Never in my life did I think she would do this to me. Never did I think she would do this to our child. Never before did I believe she was capable of doing this to. . . herself._

_Finding out was like being punched in the stomach; all the wind was stolen from my body. My heart ached worse than ever before as the floor opened up, and I fell right through in an endless descent into every ugly moment of self-doubt and self-loathing I had ever experienced in my entire life._

_And that's how I feel right now as I lie here attempting to find some justification or explanation for all of this, something I doubt I'll ever be able to find. _

_Just like back then, things are happening beyond my control; everything that is happening is what I swore never would, and I'm once again transported to the worst time of my life._

_A time when my wife and I had become like so many other couples; the kind of couple I never imagined we would be. A couple who was untrusting and dysfunctional. One that was heartless and unkind. _

_I cringe at the thought of all the things I missed, of the things that were happening when I wasn't looking, of the fact that my wife was miserable when I thought she was happy._

_Maybe I was naive. Maybe I didn't want to see her pain, but we had made such progress. It seemed that we had made it through, that we had emerged from the ashes of a raging inferno of anger and despair, that we had gone from the couple who couldn't even tolerate being in the same room with each other, to a happy, loving one with a bright future ahead of them._

_Except I was wrong. _

_We weren't happy. _

_My wife wasn't happy and so she had sex with another woman. _

_And now, two years later, the same woman who swooped into our lives and took advantage of my wife, a married woman, may be needed to help save our daughter's life._

_I would be remiss to say Arizona was completely innocent, but who does that? Who deliberately pursues a woman who is married? What kind of person knowingly attempts to ruin a family and then lies about it?_

_In the wake of the storm, I searched my soul for the answers to these questions but, eventually, I had to push all thought of her out of my mind. _

_Just as I need to do right now, but how can I consciously decide to bring the woman who nearly ruined my marriage back into our life? How can Arizona just expect me to be okay with that?_

_The answer to that question is one I can't seem to find. On one hand, I have to realize I would not be bringing her back for me, and not for Arizona, but for our innocent baby girl who grew inside my body for the past eight months. For the beautiful child I have been blessed with. _

_And I know. . .I know I'm being selfish and narrow-minded at a time when I really need to be more selfless than I've ever been, but the truth is. . .I'm torn. I've spiraled back to that fateful night. The night my world fell apart. _

_I feel sick._

_feel hurt. _

_I'm angry at my wife for placing us in this situation and scared to death that having that woman back in this hospital will be the hardest test Arizona and I have ever had to take. Harder than Africa. Harder than car wrecks and plane crashes. Harder than amputations and infidelity. Harder than the journey we were forced to travel to find ourselves again._

_How can the world be so unkind? How can it grant me such a miraculous gift only to spit in my face?_

_How can I choose to bring that woman back into our lives?_

_But really, how can I not?_

* * *

"BP is one eighteen over seventy-two, incision looks good," Miranda Bailey spoke as she lowered Callie's hospital gown back over the freshly sutured surgical cut now marring the brunette's lower abdomen. "Any dizziness?"

Callie shook her head to the negative.

"Blurry vision?"

"No."

"Headache?"

"No, Bailey," Callie indignantly huffed.

"Nausea?"

"No."

"Stomach pain? Muscle aches?"

"No, and no," Callie hissed, turning away from her doctor and friend. "I'm fine, Bailey. Now, can you please just leave me alone?" she choked out as she pulled the covers up over her body.

"Severe agitation?"

Callie looked over her shoulder, scowling at the short statured surgeon.

"Yes, that much is clear," Miranda answered on her own before taking a seat in the chair next to the brunette, forcing the brooding woman to meet her eyes. "I know you've had a terrible couple of days, and I know that having a baby in the NICU is miserable, but this is more than that? What's the matter with you, Torres?"

Callie immediately felt tears brim in her eyes for what seemed like the thousandth time that day. "It's nothing," she lied, wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand. "I'm just overly emotional and _overthinking_, trying to figure out what I need to do for Olivia."

Miranda sat back in her chair, pursing her lips as she considered her friend's words. "That seems pretty simple to me. You do anything and everything you can to make sure she's okay. You find the best surgeon available to perform the necessary procedure on your little girl."

Callie rolled her eyes before straightening herself up in the bed. "Do you by any chance _realize_ who the best doctor for Olivia's surgery is?" she asked, her eyes hard and unrelenting.

The shorter surgeon leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees. "I have a pretty good idea," she admitted with a shrug. "But you and Arizona beat that horse to death years ago, and you both came out better for it."

Callie stared at her friend, knowing everything she was saying to be true, but hating it nonetheless. "I'm just not sure I _can_, Bailey. That was the most horrifying time of my life, and I just. . .I just can't," she insisted with a shake of her head. "What would you do if it was Ben? If it was your life?"

Glancing toward the door when she saw movement out the corner of her eye, Miranda waved at Arizona who now stood in the doorway before slowly making her way to her feet. "I think you already know," she softly spoke, patting her friend on the arm before turning on her heel to exit the room.

Once alone, Arizona lingered across the room before nervously moving to take a seat next to her wife's bed. Folding her hands in her lap, she sighed as she dragged her attention toward the tired brown eyes of the woman she loved. "My parents are on their way to the house for the night. They'll be back in the morning and insist on picking Sofia up from school for us."

Callie only gave a slight nod, unwilling to speak at this time as she attempted to gather her own disconcerted thoughts.

"Olivia is good. Respirations are forty, heart rate one forty-five, O2 sats are ninety-three. She's sleeping," Arizona added, desperately needing to fill the uncomfortable silence that permeated the small room. "Derek scheduled another MRI for tomorrow morning."

"I need to say some things to you, and I really need you to promise me that you won't get mad and that you'll let me finish before you say anything," Callie informed, her voice dry and emotionless.

Arizona watched as her wife pulled the blankets from her body before guardedly moving to sit on the edge of the bed.

"I promise," the blonde softly agreed, leaning forward to give Callie her full attention.

Callie glanced toward the ceiling, blowing out a breath as she carefully chose her words. "I'm. . ._scared, _Arizona. I'm nervous. I'm. . ._angry_," she admitted, her eyes now solely focused on her wife's questioning face. "And. . .I finally realized I've been wasting all my thoughts and all my energy thinking about. . ._her, _when I should be thinking of nothing other than our little girl."

Arizona nodded in understanding but, keeping her promise, she didn't say a word.

"I know I need to get it together. . .that I'm misdirecting all of my energy, but that doesn't change the fact that I should be allowed to maintain _some_ amount of dignity, Arizona. I deserve to be able to keep _some_ self-respect."

"I know, Calliope. I. . ."

Callie held up her hand, her eyes begging Arizona to let her finish. "You broke my heart, Arizona. You and _that_ woman. . .it's been years since I've imagined the two of you together, but today, that's all I can see. It's all I've been able to think about, no matter what I do, and it makes me _sick_. It makes me _so_ mad," she continued, wanting and needing to be completely honest with her wife. "And I want to know, what do you expect me to do? How do you expect me to feel? How am I supposed to react to the thought of seeing that woman again?"

The despondency and fear she could hear in her wife's words caused tears to well in Arizona's eyes and, when she blinked, a lone streak of moisture trailed down her ivory skin. "I-I. . .I don't honestly know," she earnestly admitted with a shake of her head. "But what I _do_ know is that. . .I'm scared, too."

Callie's head snapped up from where it had slumped to stare down at her lap, her eyes confused and questioning.

Taking in her wife's shocked reaction, Arizona felt anger rise within her. "I'm not some kind of manipulative bitch, Calliope. It's not like I've completely shut that time out of my mind. Don't you think I'm worried, too?" she questioned, her voice rising in frustration.

Callie shook her head, her eyes alight with rage. "I don't know _what_ you are, Arizona! You come in here and just tell me we need to bring her back here without so much as even asking me, and what am I supposed to do? Am I just supposed to be okay with that? I mean, I do have _some_ respect left for myself!"

Arizona shook her head; this was not going at all as she had hoped. "I didn't do any such thing, Callie! I told you that we needed to talk. That we needed to research and that we needed to do what's best."

"And what's best is bringing back your little whore!?" Callie spat, immediately jumping up from the bed. "Shit!" she yelled into the room when her rapid movement caused pain to sear through her abdomen, one hand clutching at her aching midsection as the other quickly covered her mouth as the realization of the words she'd just spoken filtered into her brain.

Arizona's mouth fell agape, tears now brimming unabashed in her shocked blue eyes.

"You slept with her at a time when I-I-I didn't even realize there was something wrong with us. And now, you just expect me to face her again? You expect me to be all buddy-buddy with the woman who experienced something with _my_ wife that should be reserved only for me?" Callie continued to rant.

They stared at each other from mere feet apart and, after what felt like forever, Callie opened her mouth to speak, though this time, Arizona held her hand up to halt her. "I know that was a difficult time for you, and I know how bad I hurt you, but I will tell you right now with one hundred percent certainty that I will _never_ do something like that again. I will never hurt you again, Callie. I will never take you for granted or-or-or place our marriage in jeopardy. _Never_. I love you too much. I love Sofia and Olivia. . ._too_ much," she trailed off with a choked sob as she hastily wiped at her eyes. "I love myself _too much_ to become that _lost_, ever again."

Callie searched Arizona's cerulean eyes and, finding nothing but the steadfast strength and unrelenting honesty of the woman she had fallen in love with nearly eight years before, she gave in to all of her sadness and fears, all of her confusion and insecurities as she began to cry, the walls she'd erected that day crumbling to the ground as her body trembled with unrelenting sobs. For herself. For her daughter. For her wife. For their family.

Without hesitation, Arizona closed the distance between them, immediately gathering the sobbing woman into her arms.

"Don't, Arizona. Just. . .don't!" she hissed as she fought against her wife's embrace.

Refusing to let go, the blonde stood firm as her wife flailed within her arms. Tightly holding on until she finally felt Callie's body relax, Arizona too gave in, an unrelenting stream of tears falling from her eyes to wet the thin material of Callie's hospital gown. "I'm sorry, Callie. I'm so sorry."

Callie shook her head as she cried together with her wife and, after several long moments of holding on for dear life to the smaller woman, she pulled back so she could see her wife's face. "Me, too," she honestly spoke, her left hand brushing Arizona's bangs across her forehead. "I'm so in love with you, Arizona, but I hate this. It scares the shit out of me."

"I know," Arizona simply replied in understanding, grasping at Callie's hands with her own before aimlessly fidgeting with the wedding band encircling her left ring finger. "It scares me, too, but we have to think of Olivia. We have to do what's best for her. The _very_ best," she tearfully concluded as she squeezed Callie's cold, trembling hands.

Callie leaned into her wife, once against needing to feel her embrace.

Arizona held onto Callie with all her might, closing her eyes as she breathed in the intoxicating and calming scent that was purely the woman she loved before blowing out a cleansing breath.

"I'm here, Callie. For you and for our girls. I'm not interested in being anywhere but right here with the three of you," the blonde insisted, speaking into her wife's ear. "Please. Please believe me when I tell you that you and our family are my everything."

Hesitantly pulling away, Callie swallowed hard. "This is so unfair," she whispered with a rueful shake of her head. "But, as much as I hate this and as much as I know it's going to hurt, you're right. Olivia needs Lauren Boswell. . ."


	4. Chapter 4

**Title**: Clarity

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: M/NC-17 (For Future Chapters)

**Summary**: Three years after the plane crash, Callie and Arizona have reconciled their differences and are now the happiest they've even been. With their relationship now stronger than ever, will the necessary presence of a face from the past tear them apart? Will their marriage stand up to life's latest tragedy or will they find that they are in the exact same position they were years before?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Four**_

* * *

_**(Callie's POV)**_

_Forgiveness is a resolution. A decision to let go of resentment and thoughts of revenge._

_It's difficult to forget when we've been wronged, and I know the act that hurt me might always, and probably should always, remain a part of my life, but when I finally gave in - when I was truly able to forgive - I was finally able to see past my pain in order to focus on other, more positive parts of my life. _

_Through forgiveness, I was able to understand. To empathize. To show compassion for my wife. She had been forever changed by the events of the plane crash and by the fact that I was essentially forced to make the decision to amputate her leg. . .to save her life. _

_After that, she wasn't the same. She no longer loved herself and, because of that, I ultimately was no longer able to keep hold of her love. And that. . .was the real pain. The idea that her love was mine to keep, but that I was ultimately unable to do so. _

_For a while, I deluded myself into believing there was something I could have done to prevent it, but yet, never stopped to realize that was an impossibility. It took me so long to understand that it was entirely up to her. If anyone could have stopped what happened, it was her._

_But she couldn't. _

_She couldn't overcome her own feelings. She needed to prove something to herself. She needed to be the same as she was prior to the crash. She needed to overpower that person she no longer was in order to make herself whole again. _

_And. . .that wasn't up to me. I couldn't put her back together like I had feverishly tried to do before, because it wasn't going to work. My efforts were futile. She needed to do it for herself. She needed to find the strength to love herself again in order to be able to love me in return._

_So, I distanced myself from the betrayal and started to believe I wouldn't have been able to stop it and that I certainly didn't deserve it. Something catastrophic was bound to happen - she was eventually going to break - and while there will always be a part of me that questions that time in our lives, I also believe that it made us. . . stronger. _

_It made us better. _

_It made us both realize we weren't the same people we were years before. _

_We weren't the same girls who danced wildly in the living room of my apartment, or the women who made out in right field in the middle of the fifth inning of a hospital softball game._

_In the end, I had to swallow my pride. I was forced to forgive, but that didn't mean I denied her responsibility in hurting me, and it certainly did not minimize or justify the wrong. It just meant I had to come to terms with the fact that the woman who did this to me wasn't really my wife. She was a shell of herself, and she needed help. The help I encouraged her to seek, and when I was finally able to let go of all the anger, all the hurt, and all the pain, I finally realized I could forgive her without excusing the act, and in coming to that conclusion, I came to the realization that I no longer blamed her. _

_I blamed the plane. I blamed the infection. I blamed the circumstance. _

_I blamed Lauren Boswell. _

_Had I continued to blame Arizona, I would have been destined to wallow in a sea of self-pity for the rest of my miserable existence. So, I had to stop thinking about it. I needed to stop picturing it. I had to let it go. There was nothing else I could do but forgive. . .because forgiveness brought a kind of peace to my mind and to my heart that helped me go on with my life._

_But now, two years later, I'm faced with all this once again and, as I lie here thinking of my wife and how hard she is working to do what's best for our little girl, I can't help but think back to the lessons I learned as a child in Catholic school. . ._

_I once heard that the command to forgive is most difficult because sometimes we don't want to forgive. We want to strike back. We want justice. We want the other person to know the pain they have inflicted and, if we can't have justice, we vow we will never have a relationship with that person again. We avoid them and ignore them and, it's not surprising that when we talk about forgiveness, we are more interested in finding loopholes than we are in obeying the command._

_But, that's not true forgiveness. That's avoidance, and I'm past that. I forgave Arizona years ago and, right now, she is trying so hard to be strong and to do what's right, but I've lashed out at her, even though I promised her and myself I would no longer condemn her for her past actions. _

_I've gone back on my word, and I need to remedy that. I need to be stronger, and I need to right the wrong I have done, because I've already forgiven her. Our relationship has been restored. I found the good in her again, and her past actions no longer hold a present bearing. I momentarily lost my way, but I need to remember that my forgiveness was real, like really real, and I know that because in forgiving, my hate was replaced by love._

_And, I need to make sure she remembers that, too. I need to make sure she knows just how much I truly love her. How much I trust her. _

_With my heart. _

_With my life. _

_With our family. _

* * *

"From this morning's MRI, it appears that Olivia's craniosynostosis is an isolated defect. It's not part of a syndrome, but it is compound. It involves the . . ."

"And what exactly does that mean?" Barbara Robbins interrupted Derek Shepherd from where she sat across from him at a long table in the surgical conference room.

"Mom. . ."

Barbara turned her head, glaring at her daughter's interruption. "We just want to be informed, Arizona," the elder Robbins woman immediately contended, her blue eyes boring into those of her daughter. "You invited your father and me to this meeting, and we want to get the most out of it. We just want to understand."

Leaning back in her seat, Arizona sighed, her shoulders slumping as she hung her head.

God, why did this have to be so freaking hard?

Sensing the tension between her wife and not just her mother-in-law, but her father-in-law as well, Callie quizzically furrowed her brow, reaching out to comfort her wife with a gentle hand on her thigh.

Arizona glanced up at her wife upon feeling the lightest of touches and, giving her a weak smile, she looked back up, nodding for Derek to continue.

"I'm sure Arizona and Callie have explained some to you, but in Olivia's case, it involves the sagittal suture and one coronal suture," he informed, reaching out to illustrate his point on a model of the human skull.

"It occurs more often in premature infants and causes the head to be elongated from front to back," Alex Karev chimed in. "Dr. Shepherd and I will perform part of the surgery to relieve the elevated intracranial pressure. It's called a cranial vault reshaping."

Barbara and Daniel both nodded in understanding as Derek picked up where Alex left off. "I'll remove part of Olivia's skull in order to dissect any bone from her brain, and then Dr. Avery and Dr. Boswell will carry on from there to make the cuts necessary in reshaping her head," he explained.

The elder Robbins exchanged a knowing look before Barbara returned her attention back to the four surgeons seated around the oblong table. "And when will the surgery take place?" Barbara asked, her gaze flitting from Alex and Derek to first land on Callie and then Arizona. "When will Dr. Boswell be arriving?"

Unable to tolerate her mother's penetrating glare, Arizona looked toward Alex, hoping he could answer the woman's questions in order to take the attention off herself.

Realizing his boss' discomfort, Alex was quick to speak. "Dr. Avery is trying to get in touch with her as we speak. It depends on her schedule, but we'd like to perform the surgery as soon as possible."

Barbara nodded in understanding, her disappointed eyes never leaving her daughter's face.

Even with her head turned away, Arizona could feel the heat of her parents' glowering eyes and with that, she simply couldn't take it anymore. "Excuse me," she apologetically spoke, her voice wavering as she quickly stood to remove herself from the reprehensible stares of not just one, but both of her parents.

"Arizona?" Callie called as her wife made her way to the conference room door, staring in confusion as it swung closed behind the blonde without so much as a look back in her direction.

Glancing around at the other occupants of the room, Callie then slowly stood from the wheelchair she was seated in. "I'm sorry," she said as she followed her wife. "I'll, umm. . .I'll be right back."

* * *

Moving as quickly as her aching body would allow, Callie exited the conference room, turning left and then right in search of her clearly upset wife. Spotting her disappearing behind a supply closet door, she proceeded in that direction.

Reaching the closet and finding it locked, Callie raised her hand to rap lightly on the wooded door. "Arizona?" she called, softly knocking once again.

Receiving no response, she gently laid her palm against the door. "Arizona? You okay?"

Callie sighed when silence was all she heard. "You know, I know people around this place. I kind of own the joint, so if I have to, I'll go get a janitor or ask Owen for his keys. . ."

The sound of a wheeled stool scooting across the tiled floor of the supply closet interrupted the brunette's speech as the click of the lock caught her attention. Smiling slightly, Callie then entered the small room, re-locking the door behind her.

Spying Arizona seated alone with her back to her in the dimply lit room, Callie's heart reached out to her. "Hey. You okay?" she softly asked again, the sight of her wife's slumped shoulders as her body shook slightly, causing her heart to break.

Arizona looked up, her eyes landing on a box of four by four sterile dressings as she hastily wiped at her eyes. "I'm fine. I'm. . ."

"No you're not," Callie whispered, crossing the room to stand behind her wife, her palms coming to rest on both of her wife's shoulders.

Arizona looked up toward the ceiling, sniffing in an attempt to fend off the tears she knew were about to fall, her back collapsing into the warmth of her wife's front. "I can't take it, Calliope. I can't. . .the way they're staring at me. . .I just can't. . ."

Confused by her wife's admission, Callie slowly turned Arizona around to face her before gingerly crouching down on her knees so she could meet her wife's tearful blue eyes.

But, when the blonde refused to look at her, she gently grasped an ivory chin, turning a fair face in her direction. "The way _who_ is staring at you?" Callie gently asked, her hand lingering against the smooth skin of Arizona's cheek.

Once again looking upward, Arizona let out a breath. "My parents."

Callie squinted her eyes, unsure of why her in-laws would be staring at her wife in any certain way.

"I-I. . .I told them about Lauren. I told them that I'm a cheater, and now. . .now they _stare_," she explained, her voice cracking as a sob erupted from her chest, her body quickly dissolving into the fit of tears she'd been so desperately trying to hold at bay.

With that revelation, Callie understood, quickly gathering her trembling wife into her arms and allowing her to cry. Gently stroking the back of a blonde head as she held her trembling wife, Callie felt her own tears threatening to spill forth, but clearing her throat, she closed her eyes, willing herself to be strong.

For herself.

For Arizona.

For their family.

"They're not staring at you, Arizona. They're just. . ."

"They're staring, Callie," the blonde quickly spoke as she pulled away from Callie's strong embrace, her tone more harsh than she intended it to be. "I know the stares. They have the exact same look in their eyes that you did. . ._before_, and it's the same look you gave me last night."

Callie's face fell as she considered Arizona's words, their argument and her own accusations from the previous night entering her mind and, right then, she knew she needed to remedy her actions; she needed to right the wrong she had done. "Look at me, Arizona," she softly beseeched, her voice gentle but stern.

Arizona shook her head. "I can't, Callie," she cried. "I can't. I don't want to see that look in your eyes. It's enough to see if from them, but you. . ."

Callie reached out, squeezing her wife's shaking hands. "Look at me right now, Arizona," she once again insisted. "I need you to look into my eyes."

"No, Callie. . ."

"Please, Arizona. I want you to look at me right now and tell me what you see."

The blonde once again shook her head but, when Callie's grip on her hands only increased, she finally turned her head, tearful blue eyes meeting beautiful chocolate brown.

"What do you see?" Callie softly repeated once she was sure she had her wife's attention.

There was complete silence throughout the small room as Arizona studied her wife's soulful brown eyes as if she were admiring the beauty of the frescos of the Sistine Chapel; cerulean eyes scrutinizing chocolate orbs as if studying the vivid coloration of a work by Vincent Van Gogh.

"What? Do? You? See?"

Arizona sighed, the tension in her body beginning to visibly diminish as she searched Callie's face, her weary eyes soon landing on the eyes she found herself drowning in on a daily basis and, in those eyes, all she could see was. . .love.

Devotion.

Dedication.

Trust.

All she could see in Callie's eyes was their future together with their beautiful little girls. Not the anger, disappointment, or distress she had been expecting to find reflected back at her.

Callie smiled slightly as she watched her wife's stormy blue eyes lighten as tears once again welled in those magical azure seas. "I'm sorry I ever looked at you like _that_, Arizona. I promised you I'd never do that again, and I let you down. I let myself go back to _that_ place, and I'm sorry. . ._so_ sorry."

Arizona's jaw clenched as she attempted to fight off the torrent of tears that were once again determined to swallow her whole but, too exhausted to fight it, she gave in, her body shaking with all the emotion and all the fear that had been building inside her for the past two days.

"It hurts, Callie. I. . ._hurt_. So much. You. . .Olivia. Finding you like that," she trailed off, shaking her head and trying to rid herself of the image of Callie lying lifeless on their bedroom floor. "I was so scared. You're heart. . ._stopped_, Callie! A-a-and then, Olivia. I never suspected that anything like this could be wrong. The ultrasounds. . .everything looked good. She was fine. You-you were _fine_, but. . ."

Tears welled in Callie's eyes as she watched the anguish once again rise within her wife's dejected form. She had been so selfish; she'd not even considered Arizona's feelings in all of this and, with that in mind, she swallowed hard, vividly recalling just how harrowing it felt to hear that the love of her life was dying. It was the worst feeling in the world, and she mentally chastised herself for not thinking of what Arizona had been through.

"And now, my parents know that their daughter is a big ol' _slut, _and _I. . ."_

"I'm going to stop you right there," Callie quickly interrupted with a defiant shake of her head as she wiped at her own tears.

"It's true, Callie. I'm gay. I have one leg. I'm a cheater and a whore. And they're both looking at me like I just strangled their puppy, and I. . .I'm-I'm. . ."

Callie reached up, her palms firmly holding onto the sides of Arizona's face. "You're wonderful," she honestly insisted, her brown eyes boring into tearful blue. "You're amazing. You're beautiful. You're spectacular, just the way you are. You. Are. Great, Arizona. And I love you. Sofia loves you. Olivia loves you. You're parents _love_ you."

"Hmm," Arizona doubtfully hummed with a roll of her eyes, her tears finally beginning to slow. "I'm pretty sure that's not love they're looking at me with, Callie. Let's face it. My parents hate me."

"They don't hate you, Arizona. They're just a little. . .in shock. They need some time. They just need to _understand_."

Arizona shrugged as she wiped at a stray tear that escaped the confines of her eye.

"Come here," Callie insisted, once again pulling her wife into her arms. "You just need to have a conversation with them. Just lay it all out on the table and tell them everything, and you know what?"

"What?" Arizona asked, pulling away so that she could see her wife.

Callie smiled, reaching out to wipe the last of the moisture from Arizona's face. "I'll be right there with you the entire time. We're going to get through that just like we're going to deal with everything else that's happening right now."

Arizona couldn't help but smile at the sincerity she heard in her wife's voice. "Ugh," she groaned, blowing out an exaggerated breath. "Can't I just stay in here until this is all over?"

Callie regarded her wife, a knowing and sympathetic look on her face. "Only if I can stay here with you. Especially when _you know who_ gets here," she teasingly replied with a wink.

Arizona reached forward, tucking a stray lock of brunette hair behind her wife's ear. "Thank you, Callie," she softly spoke, cerulean eyes looking less downtrodden than they had in over forty-eight hours.

"You're welcome, sweetheart, and I'm so, _so_ sorry. I. . .yesterday, I just had so many thoughts flashing through my mind. The plane crash. The amputation. _That woman_. And I was so angry. . ."

"Callie. . ."

"But then, I finally realized I was projecting my feelings onto you, Arizona, and then I decided all those things have something in common."

Arizona quizzically regarded her wife as Callie cleared her throat, shifting her weight, her knees on the cold tiled floor beginning to ache. "Losing you, Arizona. All the things I was thinking about led me to losing you, and I just. . .I can't. . .the thought of that. . .scares me to death."

Arizona leaned forward, once again embracing her wife. "You're not going to lose me, Callie, and when _that woman _gets here, I'm going to make sure she realizes that, too. We are together, and we're going to stay that way. Forever," she adamantly insisted as she shook her head against a tanned neck.

Callie closed her eyes, breathing deeply as she sent a silent prayer up to the heavens, thanking whoever might be listening for the strength and resilience of the woman she held in her arms.

"I know," she quietly admitted as she pulled back to gaze into Arizona's eyes. "And I'm _so_ sorry for thinking otherwise. . .or for looking at you with anything other than the love and respect you deserve."

Arizona closed her eyes, blowing out a cleansing breath, content to just linger in Callie's loving embrace for the rest of her life. "I love you, Calliope. So much."

Gently pressing a kiss against the smooth skin of her wife's neck, Callie smiled. "I love you, too."

* * *

_**(Flashback: Two Years Ago)**_

_"I just. . .I can't stand the way she looks at me," Arizona admitted to her therapist who sat across the office from her in a high back arm chair. _

_With her interest piqued, the counselor tapped her pen again the clipboard she held in her hands. "Are we talking about Callie?" she asked._

_Arizona hesitantly nodded her head. "It started after the crash. When I was in the hospital. . ." she trailed off as she gathered her thoughts. "I was a mess. Hysterical. I begged her not to let them take my leg, and she. . .I know now that she was at a loss. That at the time, she said the only thing she possibly could," the blonde rationalized, tilting her head to the side in thought. "She promised me she'd save it but, in the end, she couldn't. She couldn't keep the promise she made to me, and the pity - the fear in her eyes - I trusted my wife more than any other person in the world, but she. . .she betrayed me."_

_"Is that how you feel now?" the therapist asked once Arizona had finished her statement. _

_Arizona shrugged, nervously shaking her head. "I, umm. . .yes. A little bit, I do," she admitted, clearing her throat. "The rational part of me knows she made the only possible decision she could - that her decision ultimately saved my life, but sometimes. . .well, sometimes I have a really hard time being rational when it comes to all of this."_

_The therapist nodded her understanding, pausing momentarily to allow Arizona to continue if she needed to. _

_When her patient remained tight lipped, the counselor decided to speak. "You mentioned that it started after the crash. What happened after that?"_

_Arizona inhaled deeply, fidgeting with the wedding ring she absolutely refused to remove from her left ring finger. "Callie's eyes. They're. . .magical. Just looking into them, I've always been able to see her every thought, her every feeling. . ." she mused, a dreamy look on her face, "and after. . .my leg, all I could see was disappointment. In me. In herself, I think. Her eyes were just so. . .sad. So hurt. My words and my actions sucked all the light and all the magic out of those stunning brown eyes. For a while, it. . .things got better. I got better. . .or at least I thought I did, but I wasn't the same. As much as I tried - as much as Callie wanted it to be, nothing was the same."_

_The counselor sat quietly, waiting for Arizona to continue. _

_Anxiously shifting her weight in her seat, Arizona dropped her therapist's gaze, her now tearful blue eyes staring at a picture on the wall behind the other woman's head. "Callie did everything right, but when I looked in her eyes, all I could see was the pity. Even when she told me I was beautiful. . .so, so beautiful. . .even when she told me there was no way she would ever leave my side, all I could see in her eyes was remorse. Sorrow. My wife didn't look at me like she used to."_

_"Did Callie really look at you with sorrow? Or do you think that was just your perception of the way she was looking at you?"_

_Arizona furrowed her brow, her mouth falling open in question. "I, umm. . .what do you mean?" she nervously asked._

_The therapist shifted her weight as she rephrased her question. "Do you think what you were seeing could have stemmed from your own insecurities?"_

_Arizona carefully considered her therapist's question, all the times Callie had demonstrated her feelings to her crossing her mind. "I think, umm. . .a little bit of both. I guess," she vaguely replied._

_The therapist nodded, making a note on the page she held in her hand. _

_Taking the counselor's silence as her cue to continue, Arizona crossed her right leg over her left. "And so, I got caught up in how the looks - the stares - of another woman made me feel," she trailed off with a dejected sigh. "I. . .I cheated on my wife. I slept with a perfect stranger because I liked the way she looked at me. She made me feel whole again at a time when all I wanted was for people to look at me like a normal human being. Not like a person who almost died in a plane crash. Not like the surgeon with only one leg," she paused, closing her eyes before opening them to look directly at her therapist. "She looked at me with admiration. With desire in her eyes, and now. . .because of that, because she looked at me in the exact way I'd so desperately been craving, all I can see when I look into Callie's eyes is how much pain she's in. How much I hurt her."_

_Arizona momentarily paused to reflect on the words she'd just spoken but, having so much more to say, she continued. "I'm just so. . .mad. At myself. At Callie. I know I shouldn't blame her, but I do. I blame her for the way other people look at me. I blame her for the fact that my life will never be the same. I blame her for betraying my trust. I. . .I blame her for the look in her own eyes."_

_The therapist stared across the room toward Arizona, her face one hundred percent unreadable. _

_"I blame Callie for the fact that I've let everyone down, but at the same time. . .I want her back. I don't want to live without her. I don't want to spend night after night without Sofia and Callie and myself in the same place," Arizona honestly spoke before pausing and once again shaking her head. "How messed up is that?" she ruefully asked, not necessarily expecting to hear an answer. _

_The counselor smiled softly before glancing down at her paper. Looking back up, she considered her patient before deciding to speak. "Have you talked to Callie about any of this? Have you told her what you just told me?"_

_A sardonic bark of laughter escaped Arizona's chest at the question as she shook her head. "Callie's not. . .she's not really there, yet. She's not exactly ready to listen to a whole lot of what I have to say."_

_The counselor quietly sat considering her patient's response. "And have you been ready to talk? Like really talk about all of this with her?"_

_Arizona shook her head. "I guess not," she earnestly replied. "I mean, I've tried, but I. . .I guess deep down, no. I haven't really been ready, either."_

_The therapist nodded in understanding, crossing one leg over the other. "Then that's your homework for next week. I want you to talk to your wife. Not an argument. Not just hello or goodbye at work or when you're picking up Sofia, but a real conversation."_

_Arizona quizzically regarded the therapist. "What if she's not willing? What if she still isn't ready?"_

_"Then you need to find a way. The ball is in your court, Arizona. If you want Callie back, it's your job to make her listen to you."_

* * *

Callie worried her bottom lip between bright white teeth as her eyes scanned the article she'd pulled up on her iPad.

_Craniosynostosis and Craniofacial Surgery: A Parent's Guide_

As she stared at the screen, her eyes flitting from left to right, her fear and anxiety over Olivia's upcoming surgery became more and more intense with every word she read.

Sighing, she closed her eyes, setting the tablet to the side with a shake of her head. She may have been a surgeon, but as a mother, she just couldn't read anymore. She couldn't sit there and imagine the fact that Derek Shepherd was going to cut into her brand new baby girl's skull. . .

"Ugh. No more," she groaned to herself, adamantly shaking her head in an attempt to rid herself of the disturbing and admittedly terrifying visions now consuming her mind.

Taking a deep breath, she swung her legs over the edge of the bed. She needed to get out of her room. She needed to be around other people instead of just her thoughts and research and obsessive reading. She needed something to do so she could stop overthinking and dwelling on her baby's impending surgery.

She needed to see her sweet baby Olivia.

But, just as she was about to stand from her seat, the sound of a very familiar and extremely contagious laugh accompanied by a small set of feet running down the hallway toward her room, caught her attention.

With a smile on her face and a slight chuckle of her own, Callie closed her eyes.

A visit from her _other_ baby girl would do just fine.

"Mommy!" Sofia shouted as she came bounding through the open hospital room door, followed closely by Daniel and Barbara Robbins.

"Mija!" Callie greeted, the sight of her five year old daughter helping to lift her melancholy spirits. "How was school, sweetheart?" she asked, smiling brightly as Sofia climbed up the mattress to take a seat next to her.

"It was great, mommy!" Sofia excitedly answered, tugging her backpack off her shoulders and dropping it to the floor to land with a thud. "Ms. Pam read _Olivia and the Fairy Princesses_ to us_, _and I told everyone that my new baby's name is Olivia. Not the pig, Olivia, but my baby sister, Olivia."

Callie smiled as she intently listened to her daughter continue to happily ramble on about her day, nodding her head as Sofia told the tale of how she played with Joshy on the playground while Abigail had to sit in timeout for pinching Brayden because he wouldn't let her into the playhouse. "Sounds like you had a wonderful day, big girl," Callie finally stated, once she was able to get a word in.

"I did, mommy! A-a-and I'm so excited 'cuz Gram and Pop-Pop said that today, I get to go see Olivia! Not the pig. My sister."

* * *

_**(Flashback: Two Months Ago)**_

_"And I will eat them here and there. I will eat them ANYWHERE! I do so like green eggs and ham! Thank you! Thank you! Sam-I-Am!" Callie trailed off as she closed the Dr. Seuss book she held in her hand, rolling onto her side to face her daughter who lay snuggled next to her in the little girl's bed._

_"I love that book, Mami," Sofia admitted with a smile on her cherubic face._

_Callie brushed soft raven bangs back from the child's face, her hand lingering over a smooth cheek. "I know you do, sweetheart. Momma has been reading it to you since before you were born," she mused, remembering back to her first pregnancy._

_A small hand reached out, gently rubbing the baby bump of Callie's six month pregnant belly. "How much longer until my baby gets here," Sofia asked, caressing her mother's taught abdomen through the cotton of her t-shirt._

_Callie placed her hand over the smaller one, her eyes never leaving the identical dark brown ones staring back at her. "About fourteen weeks," she answered, the same response she had given the night before._

_Sofia's bottom lip jutted out in an adorable little pout that reminded Callie so much of Arizona that she couldn't help but laugh. "That's still a long time, isn't it?" the smaller Latina asked in frustration._

_Callie nodded her head. "Yeah, we still have a while to wait, but your baby will be here before we know it."_

_Sitting up on the bed, Sofia placed both hands on her mother's belly. "And we still don't know if it's a boy baby or a girl baby?" she asked._

_"No, Mija. Momma and I told you that we're going to be surprised. Won't that be an awesome surprise?"_

_Sofia paused, her hands lovingly moving over Callie's bump. "If it's a boy baby, can we name him Sam?" she innocently asked._

_Callie pursed her lips in consideration. "That's not a bad name, but why do you want to name the baby Sam?"_

_"'Cuz of Sam-I-Am, mommy! That's my favoritest book, and I think we should name a boy baby Sam," Sofia replied as if that response was the most obvious answer in the world._

_"I'll have to discuss that with your momma," Callie replied, hugging her daughter closer to her once the little girl laid back down. "And what do you suggest we name a girl baby?"_

_Sofia rolled her eyes as if Callie was the densest person in the world. "That's easy Mami, we'll name a girl baby after my other favoritest book," she dramatically scoffed._

_"And what book is that?" Callie asked._

_"Geez, Mami. It's. . .Olivia."_

* * *

Callie shifted herself back into the bed, her legs outstretched in long sitting with Sofia seated in between them and playing with her Leap Pad as she went through the contents of her daughter's book bag.

"When can we go see Olivia, Pop-Pop?" Sofia asked of her grandfather who sat silently next to his wife on a small love seat on the opposite side of the room.

"That's up to your moms, kiddo," Daniel replied, looking toward Callie who had been polite, but had diligently kept to herself for the half hour they had been present in her room.

Looking up from the papers she held in her hand, Callie sighed. "We'll have to wait until momma gets back, baby girl. She's. . ."

As if on cue, Arizona appeared in the doorway with Alex Karev standing behind her, a slight smile lighting her face when she saw Callie and Sofia seated together in the middle of her wife's hospital bed.

"Momma!" Sofia cheered, immediately hopping down to scurry across the floor to her mother.

Bending down, Arizona instantly picked up the happy little girl, holding her close. "Mmm, I missed you!" the blonde hummed, swinging Sofia back and forth in her arms before pressing a loud kiss to her cheek. "How was school today?" she asked as she set her daughter back down on the floor.

"It was great, momma! And now, I'm so excited 'cuz I get to see my baby Olivia."

Arizona nodded her head, taking her daughter's hands into her own. "That's right, big girl. Alex is going to take you in now and get you all gowned up, and then Mami and I will be there soon. Sound good?"

Sofia emphatically nodded her head. "This is gonna be so cool!" she cheered, completely bypassing her mom to stand next to Alex.

Reaching up and tugging on his much larger hand, she hastily tried to pull him out of the room. "Come on, Dr. Alex. Let's go! I want to see my baby!"

All of the adults in the room laughed at the exuberance of the child and even more at the fact that the much larger doctor allowed her to lead him in whatever direction she chose.

Once Alex and Sofia were completely out of her sight, Arizona crossed the room, leaning over the bed to lay a gentle kiss on Callie's cheek. "You feeling okay?" she asked, adamantly refusing to look in her parents' direction.

Callie only nodded, squinting her eyes as she knowingly watched Arizona ignore the other two people in the room.

With a slight sigh at the look on her wife's face, the blonde stood from where she had perched herself on the edge of Callie's bed to face the two people she never in her life wanted to disappoint.

"So, two years ago, I had an affair. Just a little one. It was just once, and it was only like twenty minutes of my life, but it happened. I did it. I cheated on Callie, and now the two of you are staring at me like the world has ended. So there. I said it. I'm a cheater. I'm a terrible person. I'm. . ."

"Arizona!" Barbara gasped and she jumped up from her seat, completely shocked by how blasé her daughter was acting.

"What, mother? What?" Arizona spat. This wasn't at all how she'd anticipated having this conversation, but now that her words had spewed forth in the form of verbal diarrhea, there was nothing else she could do. "It happened. It's over. Callie and I have moved past it and, because of it, we are in the best place we've ever been."

"How can you say that, Arizona? How can you behave as if this is all just okay? This is not at all who we raised you to be!" Daniel argued, standing next to his wife.

Arizona shook her head, about to lose even more of her cool than she already had but, when a strong hand reached out to tightly grasp her own, she closed her eyes, taking a calming breath.

When she felt her heart rate finally begin to slow, she opened her eyes, glancing down into the miraculous face of the woman she loved. Smiling slightly at the support she saw written across her every feature, she then turned her head to once again face her angry parents. "You're right, dad. I'm _not_ who you raised me to be. I'm not that person. I-I-I was in a car wreck, and I changed. I became a mother, and I changed. I married Callie. . .I changed. I lived through a plane crash, and I changed. I only have one leg, so I changed. I cheated on my wife, and I changed. I'm not excusing my actions in any way, dad, but I'm just not the same person I used to be," she contended, her grip on Callie's hand increasing with each word she spoke. "I-I-I'm so much better than that person, mom. I was brought to my knees, but somehow I was able to stand tall again. I may not be the same, but I'm still your daughter, and damn it, I'm a good person. I'm a good wife and a good mother, and if you wouldn't mind, I'd really appreciate it if you could stop looking at me like _that_."

Daniel and Barbara stared wide-eyed at their daughter, both shocked into silence by her volatile tirade.

Swallowing hard as she watched anger and disappointment flash through her parents' eyes, Arizona instantly opened her mouth to apologize, but feeling Callie's grip on her hand tighten ever more, she paused.

Daniel and Barbara looked between each other before glancing back in the direction of their daughter and daughter-in-law, their faces softening from the initial condescension they had felt to something that resembled indifference. "Okay," Barbara stated, currently unable to say anything more.

Arizona looked down at Callie who proudly smiled up at her before resolutely nodding her head. "Great," she agreed, trying mightily to hide the surprise she was currently experiencing upon hearing her mother's response. "Now, umm. . .if it's okay with the three of you, I promised Sofia we would go with her to see _her_ baby."

* * *

_**(Arizona's POV)**_

_We all mess up. We've all done things we wish we wouldn't have and, a lot of times, forgiving ourselves is a lot harder than forgiving someone else. _

_For me, it was both. I desperately needed to forgive myself for being weak, for betraying my wife and disappointing the people I love, and there came a time when I had to give in, because those of us who refuse to forgive, only hurt ourselves. _

_We can't sleep. Ulcers line our stomachs. Our blood pressure rises. We see the negative in every situation because our lives are polluted with these feelings of resentment and anger. We falsely believe that, in punishing the other person, we will feel a sense of relief, when in reality, the only person paying the price was. . .me._

_So, I searched my soul. I talked with and took the advice of others even when I didn't want to, because I. . .hurt. Part of me was broken, and another part was bitter. Part of me wanted to cry, while another part of me wanted to fight. _

_I was left with a decision, and I chose. . .to forgive. To let go of the disappointment I felt in order to fight for what I wanted. In order to prove to those I had disappointed that I was worth it. _

_Because, in the end, my family was worth it. I was worth it, and when I finally believed that, I was ultimately able to forgive my wife for doing what she thought was right - for doing the only thing she could do to save my life._

_Someone once told me that I may have done a terrible thing, but that my act didn't make me a terrible person. _

_I just needed to believe it for myself._


	5. Chapter 5

**Title**: Clarity

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: M/NC-17 (For Future Chapters)

**Summary**: Three years after the plane crash, Callie and Arizona have reconciled their differences and are now the happiest they've even been. With their relationship now stronger than ever, will the necessary presence of a face from the past tear them apart? Will their marriage stand up to life's latest tragedy or will they find that they are in the exact same position they were years before?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Five**_

* * *

_**(Flashback: Two Years Ago)**_

_Making sure Sofia was securely bundled in her L.L. Bean rain coat, hood on her head and matching pink and green fish patterned rain boots covering her feet, Callie held her daughter's hand as they made their way toward the exit of Grey+Sloan Memorial Hospital on their way across the street to their warm and dry apartment. _

_It had been one hell of a week, and all Callie wanted to do was spend her weekend off cuddled up with Sofia, reading books, watching movies, and doing anything else the little girl wanted to do. _

_Stepping up to the double doors, Callie pulled her umbrella from within her bag but, before she could push through the glass doors, the blaring of the pager clipped to the side of her purse halted her forward progress. _

_With a huffed exhalation, she rolled her eyes, ripping the offensive device from its place. Groaning when she read the numbers 9-1-1 across the display, she hung her head in defeat. This was the complete antithesis of how she wanted to begin her weekend off with Sofia. _

_With a heavy heart, Callie knelt down in front of the little girl, gently pushing the hood back from her head. "Mami needs to run back to work for a little bit, big girl," she sadly stated as she tucked a strand of hair behind Sofia's ear. "I'm going to take you back to day care for a while, but I'll be as quick as I can. Then we can go home."_

_"Kay, mommy," Sofia answered, thankfully never one to argue about spending time with her playmates in the hospital daycare._

_With a dejected smile on her face, Callie leaned forward, pressing a loving kiss against a chubby caramel cheek. "Let's go," she said as she stood from her crouched position, once again taking Sofia's hand and leading her back into the lobby of the hospital. _

_Reaching the elevator, she pressed the up arrow, anxiously awaiting the doors to open. When they finally did, she pulled Sofia forward, but paused when she caught sight of the blue eyes belonging to the woman she'd fallen in love with years before. _

_"Hey," Arizona softly greeted, unsure of what else to say and, stepping off the lift, her arm brushed against Callie's as she bent down to kiss the top of Sofia's head. "Did you forget something at day care?"_

_Callie found her body on high alert the moment she felt the inadvertent touch; a strange mixture of familiarity and obscurity, anger and contentment, love and loss consuming her entire person. _

_"I, umm. . .I got paged. Rock climbing accident. I'm going to have to take her back to day care for a while," she informed, a rueful smile tugging at her lips at the sight of Arizona tickling and kissing the little girl, the sound of Sofia's intoxicating giggles causing Callie to laugh, as well._

_Straightening herself up, Arizona fidgeted with the strap of the bag hanging from her shoulder. "I could take her," she offered in a rush. "I mean, I'll take her home. . .umm, to your apartment. If you want. Until you're finished."_

_Callie's first instinct was to argue, to deny this woman who had ripped out her heart, but taking in the pleading look in her estranged wife's eyes, she found herself unable to deny her this one thing. "I. . .umm, okay," she answered, her gaze flitting to the rain that pelted the windows. "I promised her tons of books, movies, hot chocolate, and mac 'n cheese," she nervously added, focusing back on Arizona as she removed Sofia's bag from her shoulder. _

_Accepting the proffered bag, Arizona smiled, overjoyed that Callie had granted her this extra time spent with their daughter. "Okay," she said, taking Sofia's much smaller hand into her own. _

_Callie knelt down on the hard tiled floor, once again securing the hood on Sofia's head. "Momma's going to take you home, and I'll be there as soon as I can. Okay?" _

_Sofia happily nodded, laughing as Callie took her into her arms. "I love you," the brunette said into the little girl's ear before standing back up._

_"Love you too, Mami," Sofia returned, excitedly swinging the hand joined with Arizona's back and forth. _

_"Okay," Callie awkwardly said as she shoved her hands into her coat pockets._

_"Okay," Arizona replied._

_With a slight nod of her head, Callie then turned to once again push the up button of the elevator but, before she could turn all the way around, the warm feeling of Arizona's hand against her own, stopped her. Slowly facing the blonde, she couldn't help but focus on the warmth and ardor she found reflected in her cerulean eyes, something that had been absent for so long._

_Gazing back into Callie's magical brown eyes, Arizona had to fight the urge to continue holding the taller woman's hand. Begrudgingly dropping it from her grasp, she smiled a sincerely grateful smile. "Thank you, Callie."_

* * *

_Nearly five hours later, Callie slowly walked toward the blue door of apartment 502, sighing as a twinge of sadness at the thought of missing out on the evening with Sofia combined with the fact that Arizona's heartwarming laughter no longer filled their home, causing her heart to ache. _

_Shaking her head in an attempt to rid herself of that thought as she pressed her key into the lock, Callie suddenly realized that while an intern had packed up Arizona's things and delivered them to her at the hospital, she had never asked the blonde for her key back. Deciding there was no harm in allowing her to keep it in case of emergencies, she turned the door knob, gently pushing it open. _

_Quietly removing her jacket and hanging it on a rack near the door, she then deposited her bags on the nearest sofa. Glancing around the room as she did, she noted there was a fire lit in the fireplace, supplying the only light in the living area of the apartment. _

_With a quick look to her left, her breath caught in her throat at the sight of mother and child cuddled together, fast asleep on the red sofa in front of the window. _

_Callie couldn't help but stare at the sight; several long moments passing as she admired the pair - the contrast of the ivory skin of Arizona's arm wrapped securely around Sofia's caramel one - warming her heart. She found herself mesmerized by the sight. Arizona and Sofia looked so angelic in their sleep. So perfect, and it was more than obvious that the two belonged together._

_Granting herself a few more moments to stare, she then shook herself from her silent musings before softly padding across the floor to extract the sleeping toddler from Arizona's loving embrace in order to carry her to bed._

_The moment Arizona felt Sofia move, her eyes snapped open with a look of fear, but it was soon replaced by relief when she realized it was Callie who had lifted the little girl from her grasp. As she watched the two disappear behind the nursery door, she closed her eyes, wanting to go back to sleep. _

_But realizing her place, she quickly sat up, feeling incredibly unsure of herself. Deciding Callie would most likely want her to leave, she stood from the sofa, slipping on her shoes before making her way to the door. Grabbing her rain jacket from the rack, she threaded her arms through the sleeves, turning around when she heard Callie approach from behind. _

_"Thank you, Arizona. You, umm. . .you saved me, tonight," Callie honestly stated._

_Nodding in reply, Arizona zipped up her jacket before reaching out to grab her bag from a table near the door. "You're welcome," she replied. _

_Callie stood still as she watched Arizona turn to leave and, just when the blonde's hand began to turn the knob, Callie jumped backward when her estranged wife surprisingly spun around to face her. _

_"I did what you said," Arizona anxiously stated, her hand nervously pushing her now shortened blonde hair behind her ear. _

_Callie quizzically regarded the shorter woman, her own hands wringing together in front of her._

_"Counseling. Therapy. I went. . .I've been going. Ever since that first night."_

_Surprised by Arizona's disjointed admission, brown eyes momentarily widened before she quickly composed herself. "Good. That's good," Callie said with a nod of her head._

_"Yeah. It has been," Arizona agreed with a nod of her head. "It's nice to talk to someone, and umm, it's made me realized that before. . .in the beginning, I really wasn't ready to talk, not to you at least, but now. . .now I guess I am."_

_Callie slowly nodded, trying to follow Arizona's rambled statement, realizing she wasn't quite sure of what the blonde was alluding to. "I'm glad you decided to go. I. . .I'm proud of you."_

_Arizona smiled at Callie's words and, deciding to just take a chance, she cleared her throat in an attempt to gather herself. "So, umm. . .would you be willing? Now? Do you think we could? Talk?"_

_When the brunette didn't immediately respond, Arizona glanced toward a clock on the wall, her face registering surprise at the fact that it was already after 11:00pm. "Oh shit. I'm sorry. It's late. You've had a long day. Maybe some other time," she quickly tried to recover, immediately turning back toward the door. _

_"Arizona."_

_Upon hearing her name, she spun back around, a hopeful look shining on her face, though she tried to appear nonchalant. _

_Callie clenched her jaw, considering her options and, just when she was about to once again thank Arizona for taking Sofia for the evening, her mouth betrayed her every thought. "Yeah, umm. . .I think we could. Talk."_

* * *

"Oh, come on, Bailey. How bad can it possibly be?" Callie whined as her friend and doctor hastily tapped her fingers against the electronic tablet holding her medical record.

"Callie," Arizona tried to soothe.

"It's one fifty-six over one hundred, Torres. It's too high," Miranda warned. "I told you I'd release you if your BP remained within normal limits, but that hasn't happened. So, you're staying. No questions asked. End of story."

Rolling her eyes, Callie shook her head. "It's not like I'd be going anywhere. I'd still be at the hospital. We have a baby in the NICU, Bailey," she pointedly stated with a huff. "I mean, check Arizona's blood pressure. I'm sure it's elevated, too."

With a warning look in her eyes, Miranda ignored Callie's request, choosing instead to make her way across the room to where Sofia sat coloring with Arizona at a small table in the corner. "Hey babes," she said, removing the crayon from the little girl's grasp and setting it to the side. "What do you say to some ice cream in the cafeteria?"

Sofia's face instantly lit up as she jumped up to stand on her chair and, just as she was about to lunge into Miranda's arms, she thought better of it, glancing first at Arizona and then toward Callie, her pleading eyes, silently asking their permission. "Please, Mami? Can't I go with Dr. Bailey? Can I have ice cream, momma?"

Arizona looked toward Callie who still appeared to be pouting at the news that she would have to remain as an inpatient in the hospital for a longer period of time before standing up, deftly adjusting the clip that secured the miniature Latina's bangs back from her face. "You can go. But only one scoop," she reluctantly allowed.

"Awesome!" Sofia cheered, turning from Arizona to finally jump into Miranda's arms. "And sprinkles?" she asked as the short statured surgeon carried the long legged five year old toward the door.

Arizona shook her head, a dimpled grin curving at her lips. Sofia couldn't be more like her if they were biologically related. "Yes, you can have sprinkles," she relented with a sigh.

"Yes!" Sofia cheered as Miranda disappeared with her out the door.

Once alone with her wife, Arizona took a moment to study Callie from across the room, tension and anxiety holding the brunette's shoulders in a rigid posture, her face and eyes utterly dejected as she blankly stared out the open hospital room door.

She knew Callie had _mostly_ been joking with Bailey; Callie knew the risks of being released from the hospital too quickly after her body had suffered such a trauma, but that knowledge didn't make the fact that she couldn't necessarily come and go as she pleased - visiting Olivia in the NICU whenever she wanted - any easier and, while this wasn't as terrible as the amount of time she'd been unable to hold Sofia after her untimely birth, this was still a tough pill to swallow.

_Again_.

With a sorrowful smile on her face, Arizona stepped up close to Callie's bed, leaning down to kiss her temple before pushing her way onto the small mattress next to her wife.

Callie immediately moved over, allowing the blonde greater room, her head automatically tilting to the side to rest against Arizona's royal blue sweater clad shoulder.

Taking a tanned hand between her ivory ones, Arizona kissed the top of Callie's head before wrapping one arm around her shoulders. "She's right, you know," she softly said against brunette hair. "We all just want what's best for you."

Callie let out a long breath, resting more of her weight against her wife, reveling in the feeling of being held by the woman she loved. "I know," she softy relented. "It's just. . .I want to do more. I _should_ be doing more."

Arizona shook her head, toying with Callie's wedding band with her own fingertips. "You're doing everything you can, Calliope. We all are," she insisted, holding her wife ever tighter. "And I. . .maybe I'm being selfish, but I. . .I want you healed, Callie. I need you one hundred percent healthy because I. . .I'd never be able to do this without you. I _need _you here to help me get our family through this."

Slowly pulling away so she could gaze at her wife, a small smile curled at Callie's mouth as she saw the sincerity of Arizona's words flash through her stunning blue eyes and, tipping her head to the side, she leaned in, her lips gently brushing against moist pink ones.

Wanting more and needing to feel the reassurance only Callie's kiss could provide, Arizona placed both her palms against the smooth skin of her wife's flawless face, tugging her forward as their lips lovingly caressed in an intimate reaffirmation of their love and commitment to one another.

With a soft moan, Callie was just about to seek entrance into Arizona's mouth with her tongue, though the clearing of someone's throat from the doorway caused both women to freeze in place before slowing turning their heads in the direction of the intruder.

"Daddy?" Callie whispered, her hands tightly grasping Arizona's as she turned in her father's direction.

Eyes widening slightly at the sight of her father-in-law, Arizona scooted over before quickly standing from the bed, though she remained as close to her wife as physically possible.

Carlos was immediately at his daughter's side, taking her into a loving embrace as he rocked her back and forth. "I thought you were out of the country. I thought you were in Europe on business," Callie rapidly stated, a confused smile covering her face.

"I was, but I came back as soon as I got Arizona's call," he informed, taking a seat on a wheeled stool next to Callie's bed before pulling her back into his arms. "There was no way I could stay away."

Looking over her father's shoulder to meet Arizona's sparkling blue eyes, she smiled as her wife winked in response before allowing herself to relax further into Carlos' loving fatherly embrace. "Thank you, daddy. I. . ."

Movement in the doorway caught both Callie and Arizona's attention, both women's bodies going into high alert.

"Mom?"

* * *

_**(Flashback: Five Months Ago)**_

_Sitting on the sofa in their living room while Arizona bathed Sofia upstairs, Callie's thumbs tapped across the touch screen of her iPhone, dialing the same number she'd called at seven thirty in the evening for more years than she could count. Bringing the phone to her ear, her free hand moved to rest against her barely there baby bump._

_"Torres residence."_

_Callie froze upon hearing that voice; a surprisingly familiar female one as opposed to the masculine one of her father she'd been expecting. "Oh, umm. . .hi mom. I was calling to speak to daddy."_

_There was silence on the other end of the line, and Callie's foot nervously began to tap up and down when all she could hear was her mother's breath through the phone. She could count on one hand the number of times she'd spoken to her mom since the fateful day she had condemned her to Hell for all eternity; the night before her wedding. _

_"Your father had to run into the office this evening, Calliope," Lucia Torres finally spoke. _

_Callie anxiously cleared her throat, adjusting her legs beneath her on the couch. "Oh, okay. I'll just call him there."_

_Just as Callie was about to end the call, her mother's voice caught her attention and bringing the phone back up to her ear, she closed her eyes in an attempt to compose herself. "I'm sorry. What did you say?" Callie softly questioned._

_There was another pause on the other end of the line before Lucia finally spoke up. "How are you, Callie? How are Sofia. . .and Arizona?"_

_Surprised by her mother's initiation of conversation, especially about her lesbian wife and her bastard child, Callie worried her bottom lip between her teeth as unexplained tears began to brim in her chocolate brown eyes. Damn pregnancy hormones. _

_"They. . .they're doing well. Sofia is amazing, daddy says she reminds him so much of me at that age. She loves kindergarten and is. . .she's just miraculous, mom," she said, her feelings toward her daughter causing her heart to swell with emotion. "And Arizona. . .she's great. She was published again last month in the Journal of Pediatric Surgery for her clinical trial on kids with Leukemia. She's doing really well. We all three are," Callie mused, realizing she could go on and on about her family for days and days._

_"That's good, Callie. I'm so happy to hear that the three of you are doing well," Lucia offered, her tone lighter than Callie could remember hearing it in years._

_"Thanks, mom," Callie replied, unsure of what else she could possibly say. _

_"You're welcome, Calliope. Your father gives me updates after every one of your calls. I. . .umm. . .I love hearing about Sofia," she softly admitted before clearing her throat. "I don't necessarily understand your marriage, but I. . .it's not my place to judge."_

_Callie sat in silence completely caught off guard by her mother's revelation. _

_"And I'm sure your father would love to speak with you, but he got called into a meeting. Is there a message I can give him?" Lucia quickly asked, feeling uncomfortable with her own admission from moments before. _

_Realizing that there actually was a reason she had called other than her usual weekly update, Callie once again adjusted herself on the sofa, unsure if she should tell her mother or just wait to break the news to her father during their call the following week. Allowing her happiness at her news to win out, she cleared her throat before swallowing hard. "Actually, yes. I. . .umm, I'm pregnant, mom. Arizona and I are having another baby."_

_The line once again was silent, and Callie could feel her heart beginning to break, but just as dejected tears were about slip down her cheeks, she heard a slight chuckle on the other end of the phone. "That's wonderful, Callie. I'm so happy for you. Sofia will make an excellent big sister."_

* * *

"Abuelo and abuela are going to take you home now, mija," Callie said as she helped Sofia into her jacket before threading her arms through the straps of her backpack. "Grandma and pop-pop are already there," she continued before leaning in to hold her daughter tight as she kissed the top of her head.

"Can abuelo and pop-pop do my bath tonight?" Sofia asked as she hopped down from Callie's bed. "I want to show abuelo how pop-pop sinks battleships in the bubbles."

Arizona rolled her eyes at her father's unwavering sense of honor and dedication to his country and the military, even during his granddaughter's bath time. "That's up to them, big girl," she said, leaning over to hug the little girl and leave a loud smacking kiss against her smooth caramel cheek. "No arguments. Your grandparents are in charge tonight."

Sofia nodded in understanding, and as Carlos picked her up, her face scrunched in question. "When are you coming home?" she asked, looking from Arizona to Callie who both looked saddened by the little girl's inquiry.

"We'll be home soon, Sof," Callie insisted, looking between her wife and daughter. "Dr. Bailey said I'm still too sick to come home and baby Olivia isn't feeling well, either. . ."

". . .but Mami and Olivia are going to be better before you know it," Arizona quickly took over Callie's statement. "We just need you to be patient with us right now."

Carlos and Lucia exchanged knowing looks, their hearts going out the their daughter and her wife at the situation they had been presented with. "How about abuelo and I take you to the park after school tomorrow?" Lucia offered.

Surprised by her mother's proposal, Callie's eyes widened in shock. She doubted her mother had ever been to a park, let alone taken a rambunctious five-year-old with unending amounts of energy to one, and the thought of high powered attorney Lucia Torres chasing Sofia around a jungle gym and down the twirly slide instantly caused her to chuckle.

Sending Callie a poignant look, Lucia defiantly crossed her arms over her chest. "What, Calliope?" she asked with a hint of consternation in her voice.

"Nothing," Callie quickly replied, biting her bottom lip in an attempt to hold her laughter at bay. "You three have a good time."

With one last wave goodbye and _I love you's _exchanged, Arizona crossed the room, leaning over her wife to press a kiss against her temple. "I'm going to go check on Olivia and then find an on-call room to sleep in for a couple hours," she softly stated, running her hand through thick brunette hair.

Callie searched Arizona's face, finding exhaustion written across her every feature. She knew they both needed their rest, but she just wasn't quite ready to let her go. "Stay with me," she softly beseeched, reaching up to wrap one arm around a slim waist. "I. . .I'm tired of being alone in here."

Tipping her head to the side, Arizona smiled apologetically before allowing herself to be pulled down to sit next to her wife on the bed. They sat in silence for several long moments, two drained and frazzled bodies resting against each other in an attempt to recharge, to soak up any amount of strength or clarity the other had to offer.

"Sofia's going to be okay, right?" Callie asked a short time later.

Glancing to her side, Arizona kiss Callie's temple. "It's going to be rough for a while, but I think she's managing pretty well. Don't you?"

Callie sighed, crossing one leg over the other at her ankles. "I think so. As long as our parents are here to keep her occupied. And Bailey and the McDreamy's. Yeah, I guess so. I guess she'll be alright."

Another companionable calm fell between the two women before Arizona felt her own body begin to shake with the trembling woman at her side.

Immediately thinking her wife was crying, the blonde swung her arm around her shoulders to offer support, but turning toward her, she realized that Callie wasn't crying at all, but laughing instead. "Can you believe. . .my mom offered to take Sofia. . .to the park?" she managed to get out, her laugh now verging on hysterical.

Arizona looked confused at first, but allowing her mind to register the fact that her mother-in-law simply was NOT the playground type, she too began to shake, a hearty laugh erupting from deep within her chest.

They spent several long minutes consumed in a fit of giggles, happy tears sliding down both caramel and ivory cheeks. "I'm pretty sure we're delirious," Arizona choked out in between her laughter. "We are certifiably insane."

Wiping at her eyes, Callie nodded in agreement. "Someone should probably have us committed," she teased, leaning over to press a kiss against the corner of Arizona's mouth.

"They'll probably take our kids away from us," Arizona added, leaning her weight more fully against her wife as their laughter filled the room.

Stepping through the door, Alex Karev and Jackson Avery quizzically regarded the hysterical women whose bodies continued to quake with the vehemence of their now howling cackles. "Robbins," Alex called into the room, hoping to get his boss' attention. Receiving no response, he tried again. "Robbins! Torres!"

Finally hearing the voice of the intruders who had infiltrated their private and pretty pink bubble, Callie and Arizona both looked in the direction of their visitors, their faces instantly falling into sober impassiveness as they witnessed the stoic looks on both of the younger attending' features.

Straightening up, Arizona was the first to gather herself enough to speak. "What is it Karev?"

"Is it Olivia?"

"Is she okay?"

"Olivia's fine," Alex insisted.

Arizona exhaled the breath she didn't realize she was holding, her right hand immediately landing on Callie's thigh in some kind of unspoken support. "What is it then?"

Stepping forward, Jackson sat down on a wheeled stool at the end of Callie's bed. "I left several messages with Dr. Boswell and her chief of surgery earlier today, and she finally called back. I just got off the phone with her."

With their brief moment of jovial humor now completely disintegrating before their eyes, Arizona felt Callie's body instantly stiffen at her side.

"She can be here as early as a week from today," Jackson concluded.

Glancing between Jackson and Alex, Arizona then turned her attention to the woman who now dejectedly sat at her side. Taking her hands into her own, she held them tightly, lowering her head so that she could meet Callie's gaze. "We don't have to get Lauren, Calliope. We can find someone else. Maybe we can get Anthony Perez at Miami Children's or Carla Wells as Mass Gen. There are other doctors out there, Callie, and if you aren't absolutely sure about this, we can call one of them."

Adamantly shaking her head, Callie swallowed the lump that had taken up residence in her throat. "No," she was quick to respond. "She's the best, Arizona. We're not taking any chances on this. We're not just going to settle for second best."

Searching Callie's eyes for any amount of hesitation or uncertainty in her now tearful brown eyes, Arizona nodded in silent agreement and, before she could give the other doctors in the room the go ahead, her wife began to speak. "Call Dr. Boswell, Avery. Tell her to get here as soon as she can."

* * *

_**(Flashback: Two Years Ago)**_

_Arizona sat on the sofa in her counselor's office with the older woman sitting across from her in her usual overstuffed arm chair. She had come so far in opening up to the therapist about the events of the past year; she had talked and explained, she had cried and even yelled on several occasions. _

_But today everything was different. She was too nervous to speak; her heart thundering uncontrollably in her chest. _

_Glancing sidelong out the corner of her eye, she sighed. This - the fact that this time she wasn't alone with the counselor she'd grown to trust over the past four months of sessions - was exactly why she'd reverted back to excruciatingly uncomfortable silence. _

_Callie. _

_She was there, sitting two feet away from her on the opposite end of the brown leather couch, and Arizona could tell by the set of her jaw and the rigidity in her spine that she was completely second guessing the fact that she had agreed to join Arizona there today._

_Glancing between the two thoroughly uncomfortable and completely silent women, the therapist crossed one leg over the other as her gaze moved between the gorgeous blonde to land on the stunning brunette. "I'm glad you decided to join us here today, Dr. Torres," she began, causing anxious brown eyes to finally drag themselves away from the bookshelf she had been content to stare at for the past ten minutes. _

_"Callie is fine," she insisted, aimlessly running her palm over the soft leather covering the arm of the couch before clasping her palms together and resting them in her lap. _

_With a slight nod of her head, the counselor decided to push forward. "Well, Callie. Like I said, I'm glad you're here and, if you don't mind, I'd like to start with you here today."_

_Callie's face instantly registered fear upon hearing the counselor's statement. She hadn't come here to be analyzed. She'd only come because she knew she and Arizona couldn't exist in limbo any longer; they needed to either find a way to move forward. . .or to decide divorce was the best thing and, since neither had really been able to voice their true feelings and true opinions on the subject, Callie had relented when Arizona had asked her to come to this session. _

_"I'm just curious as to why you decided to join your wife today," the counselor continued._

_Chancing a look in Callie's direction, Arizona's heart sank even further into the pit of her stomach as she watched her entire form bristle at the word 'wife' before nervously beginning to fidget with the cuff of the black sweater she was wearing. Crossing her long legs and securing her hands together at the top of her knee, Callie then blew out a breath. "I. . .umm. . .it's been four months. Arizona and I have barely spoken to each other, and I. . .I guess it's time?" she said, her voice completely unsure of itself. _

_They hadn't done much talking, only yelling in the very beginning before dissolving into complete silence. They hadn't even managed to actually talk that night a month ago when Callie had agreed; yelling had once again ensued followed by Sofia calling out for her momma to come get her out of bed. _

_"You don't sound so sure of yourself," the therapist concluded the obvious. _

_A sarcastic bark of laughter escaped Callie's lips as she uncrossed her legs, anxiously running her hands up and down the length of her jean clad thighs. "That's pretty much the understatement of the century," she ruefully provided. "I. . .it's safe to say, I'm not sure of anything anymore."_

_The counselor glanced from Callie to evaluate Arizona's response to the brunette's words and, seeing nothing but sorrow written across her patient's face, she decided to cut to the chase. "That's what we're here for. To figure things out not just for you, Callie, but for Arizona, as well. But, in order to do that, you have to speak to each other, and you have to understand that you will perhaps hear some things you don't want to."_

_Both women sat in silence, neither willing to look up from the carpet beneath the therapist's feet. "No one will ever be able to understand the true reasons for everything that's happened between the two of you but, if you learn to listen to each other, to look at the bigger picture, you may learn some things about each other you didn't realize," she continued._

_Silence once again fell over the room and, after several long moments, the counselor chose to once again carry on. "You've wanted Callie to come here with you for a while, Arizona. You've wanted to talk to her, so why don't you go ahead and start."_

_Arizona's dejected blue eyes glanced upward, her body stiffening at the thought but, conceding to the fact that they would get nowhere if she wasn't the first to begin, she ran her hand over the socket of her prosthesis beneath her black jeans. "Okay," she breathed out, forcing herself to face her wife. "Callie, I. . .I've wracked my brain. I've gone over each and every step along the way, and the only conclusion I've been able to come up with is. . .I don't know. I'm not sure, in that moment, why or-or-or. . .how it happened, but it. . .it just did."_

_Adamantly shaking her head, Callie quickly stood from her seat, surprising the woman seated across the sofa from her. "I didn't come here to sit through this again. You've said all of that before, Arizona, and I'm tired of it. I just. . .I'm sorry, but I can't listen to you tell me that you don't know why you screwed some other woman, anymore."_

_Worried Callie might actually walk right out the door, the therapist spoke up in an attempt to diffuse the situation. "If we dwell on all the little details about this situation, we aren't going to get anywhere. . ."_

_"I'm pretty sure the fact that my wife had sex with another woman while still married to me, is more than just a 'little' detail," Callie retorted, crossing the room to grab her jacket from a rack near the door. _

_Quickly getting to her own feet, Arizona started to cross the room to stop her disgusted wife but, when Callie's eyes warned her not to come any closer, she paused, choosing to speak instead. "Please, Callie. Please stay. I-I-I've been trying so hard with all of this, and I just. . .I really need you to stay. I need to tell you everything. What you do with the information is up to you, but please Callie. Please just let me get everything out before you make any decisions."_

_Callie paused, the pleading in the cerulean eyes she loved so much, tearing at her heart. She'd never previously been able to deny Arizona anything when she looked at her like that, but this was all just. . .it was too much to bear. "I've finally gotten to a place where I don't cry myself to sleep every night, Arizona , and I. . .I can't go back there. I can't lose myself in all that again. I just can't."_

_"I know, Callie. I know. . .but all I can do is be honest with you. That's all I have," Arizona softly spoke, hoping she could somehow get Callie to stay and listen to her._

_When Callie didn't head back toward the door but instead, slumped against the arm of a chair at the side of the room, Arizona made the decision to quickly continue. "I don't know exactly why it happened, Callie, but what I do know is that it. . .it didn't have anything to do with you. . ."_

_"I'm just going to stop you right there, Arizona," Callie hastily interrupted, unwilling to hear the 'it was me, not you' speech she knew was about to come. "How can you even say that? A marriage doesn't just involve one person. It involves two. How can you say what you did had nothing to do with me?"_

_Arizona shook her head. Her thoughts were definitely not coming out of her mouth in the way she so desperately wanted and needed them to. "I know that, Callie. I know my actions have forever changed not just me, but both of us. Neither of us will ever be able to forget what I did, but I. . .I just need you to know that I didn't do it because I didn't love you. I didn't do it because of any one thing you did, but I-I. . .it happened. . .I think it happened because I didn't love myself enough to stop it," Arizona admitted, going over all of the sessions she had been through with the counselor in her head as she spoke. _

_Callie shook her head, unwilling to listen. "I put you above everything, Arizona. There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't hate myself for not being able to do more for you. I tried to be supportive. I tried to do whatever you needed, but all you could see was the fact that I made a decision that ultimately saved your life. . ." Callie trailed off with a rueful shake of her head, her dark brown eyes welling with tears. "I was loyal to you. I did everything for you. I took care of you, and trust me, you didn't make that easy. I was there for you, Arizona, even when you did nothing but yell at me and berate me. I've never been treated like that by anyone in my life, but I. . .I stayed. I never left, and I did it all. . .for you."_

_Arizona found herself crying at her wife's heartfelt revelation but, too angry and frustrated not to get all of her thoughts out, she began to shout. "Do you know how hard it is to lose your independence, Callie? How difficult it is to go from being a mother and a wife and a surgeon to-to-to. . .nothing? Do you know how degrading it is to need your wife to help you with everything?"_

_"Actually, I do, Arizona. I was in the hospital for three months after the car wreck. I had to learn to walk again and use my hands. I had to bust my ass to get back to some kind of normalcy," Callie insisted, anger rising in her face as she once again stood from her seat. "But do you know what the difference is between you and me? The difference is I fought for you. I fought for our daughter and for our relationship, and you. . .you did nothing but fight against me."_

_"I was lost, Callie. I wasn't healthy. I wasn't strong enough to be the mother Sofia needed. I obviously wasn't the wife you once had, and in the midst of all that, I felt betrayed by the person I loved most in the world. I lost myself. You have no idea how hard that was. . ."_

_"Because you wouldn't talk to me, Arizona. I begged you to talk to me, but all you did was shut me out! There was nothing else I could have done to save your leg, so I made the choice. Maybe I was selfish. Maybe I was wrong to think you would rather be alive with one leg than dead with two but, that's the decision I made, and there's nothing I can do about it now."_

_Arizona nodded her head, tears streaming down her face. _

_Callie was right. _

_She had become so consumed by her own anger and her own despair that she could barely tolerate breathing, let alone having a rational conversation with her wife, and that was why this had all happened. Neither of them was very good at communication but, had she just opened up, had they both been willing to listen to what the other had to say, they might not be in this position. _

_"There's nothing I can do about what I've done either, Callie. Other than to apologize to you, other than to take all my actions onto my own shoulders and tell you I was wrong. So very wrong. I was trying to. . .find myself. I now know I didn't go about it in the right way, Callie, and I. . .I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for what I've done."_

_Callie glanced up from where he hands were folded in her lap, her tearful brown eyes studying the moist blue ones that were boring into her soul. "That's the first time you've actually said that to me," she whispered, reaching up to brush at the tears that left damp trails down her face._

_Arizona's brow furrowed in confusion as she continued to hold her wife's gaze. "The first time I've said what?" she softly asked. _

_Callie shifted her weight, sliding into the chair from where she rested against its arm. "In all this, that's the first time you've actually told me you were sorry. All you ever said was it was a mistake and you knew I was mad, but you. . .you never apologized. Not until right now," she revealed, her eyes searching her wife's face for the realization that what she was saying was true. "Do you have any idea how much that hurt?"_

_A silence fell over the room as Arizona searched her brain for all the interactions she had engaged in with Callie since the night of the storm. She had to have apologized before now, right? There was no way she could possibly have overlooked such an integral admission. _

_Deciding to cut in, the counselor cleared her throat, causing one set of brown eyes and one set of blue to snap in her direction. "Letting go and moving forward comes in many forms, and I need to ask you, Arizona. Have you forgiven Callie for allowing your leg to be amputated?"_

_Arizona closed her eyes, searching her soul for the honest answer to that question. Opening her eyes and holding Callie's gaze, she nodded her head. "I have," she softly admitted, taking Callie by surprise. _

_"You sure do have a funny way of showing it!" the brunette angrily spat, once again making her way to her feet. _

_"And once again, I'm telling you that I didn't do this to spite you. I didn't do it to get back at you. I did it because I was trying to take control. It was like. . .it was like I was mirroring myself in Lauren. She wasn't committed. Not tied down. She was a world renowned surgeon who could chase after anything she wanted. She. . ."_

_"Well, I'm sorry Sofia and I are tying you down!" Callie angrily shot back. _

_Arizona shook her head. "That's not what I'm saying, Callie!" she shouted in response. "She accepted me. One leg and all, and it felt good, because in my mind, you. . .you only looked at me with pity. I was sure you were only there for me out of obligation, but. . .I now know I was wrong. I've realized I was projecting my own feelings. . .my inability to love and accept myself, onto you."_

_Callie sighed, dejectedly sitting back down as she nervously ran her hand through her hair. _

_"In that moment. . .with Lauren, I thought it would fix me. I thought because she found me attractive that I could heal, that I could return to my old self. I was desperate, Callie, a-a-and selfish. I behaved so carelessly, and I now know I did it because it felt good to be accepted. I thought because she accepted me. . .that I would be able to do so of myself, too. _

_Callie shook her head, disbelief and sadness written across her every feature. "You don't think I accept you? You don't think I find you attractive?" she questioned, her tone full of hurt. _

_"I thought you were just acting out of obligation, but I now know that was wrong. I was just. . .I was trying to find myself again, and when she. . .when she looked at me, I felt like my old self again, Callie. The way she looked at me felt. . .good."_

_Callie's head snapped in Arizona's direction; she felt like she was going to vomit. "I can't do this. I can't stay here and listen to you tell me about the way some other woman made you feel while she was fucking you!"_

_Arizona recoiled at her wife's vehement words. "That's not. . .I. . .I. . ."_

_"Let's just take a breath," the therapist offered. "Why don't you both sit back down and try to relax a moment."_

_Callie rolled her eyes, but did as suggested, her jacket draped over her arm, fully ready to leave at a moment's notice. _

_"This process is a rollercoaster. I tell patients it can take a year-and-a-half, or longer, to feel okay again. Progress can sometimes feel elliptical. One week you both make leaps and bounds, the next week feels like you're back to square one. If you do push through, you can emerge with a stronger, better union, but you have to be willing to talk about the affair. Neither of you will be able to heal if you don't. You need to reach the point where you can talk about it without pain. If you never, ever discuss it, you can't recover, individually or as a couple."_

_Callie and Arizona stared at the counselor, both fairly exhausted from the entire session and, when neither woman appeared willing to offer anything else, the therapist spoke again. "We're about out of time, but Arizona, I know you have something you've been wanting to say to Callie. Why don't we end with that," she suggested, making a note on the paper she held in her hand. _

_Arizona cleared her throat; she was sure that what she was about to say would fall on deaf ears, but deciding to just push through, she sighed. "I know there was nothing else you could do to save my leg, Callie, and I really hope you'll be able to accept my apology for blaming you for that for so long," she honestly began. "And I know it's going to take some work, but I. . .I love you, Calliope. I need you. I want you. I-I'm not going to try to defend myself. There's nothing to defend because what I did was absolutely wrong. It was horrible. It was terrible, and I can blame no one but myself," she earnestly insisted, slowly standing to cross the room so she was leaning against the arm of the couch only a foot away from her wife. "I'd give anything not to have been so lost and so wrong, Callie. I'd do anything to make you smile again because seeing how much pain I've caused is killing me. It's breaking my heart, and I am so very sorry. I want. . .I need you to believe me when I say that. I need you to know that nothing like this will ever happen again," Arizona paused, desperately wanting to reach out and caress her wife's tear moistened cheek but, realizing she may no longer have that right, she nervously shoved her hands into her pockets. "I know I've broken your trust. I was careless with your heart, and I don't deserve your forgiveness. I don't even really have the right to ask you this, but please, Callie, please don't give up on me. Please don't throw away our marriage. Please let me prove myself to you. Please let me make all of this right again."_

_The therapist watched the brunette once again wipe her own eyes, and the blonde's body language demonstrated that it was taking all that she had not to pull her wife into her arms. "I'd like for you to join us again next week, Callie. Do you think you could do that?"_

_Callie shook her head, completely overwhelmed by the events of the past hour and, making her way up onto unsteady legs, she sighed. "I, umm. . .I don't know. I. . .I'll have to check my schedule."_

* * *

"Do you think I could convince you to sleep in here with me tonight? I mean, I know this bed is tiny and it totally sucks, but I'd really like it if you'd just hold me tonight. I miss sleeping with you next to me," Callie asked, her head resting on Arizona's chest as a fair hand massaged her scalp.

Arizona glanced down, meeting questioning brown eyes. "I think that could probably be arranged," she softly replied with a smile before leaning down to brush her lips against Callie's.

The brunette's body completely relaxed, melting into her wife's upon hearing Arizona's response, her right hand disappearing under the blonde's shirt to caress the smooth alabaster skin of her abdomen and side. "Mmm, thank you," Callie replied once she reluctantly pulled away.

"Don't thank me, I'm doing this for purely selfish reasons," Arizona teased, loudly pecking at Callie's lips. "I can't sleep without you, either."

Callie lowered the head of the bed so they were now lying flat, tucking one arm under her pillow as the other came to rest on Arizona's hip to pull her closer into her embrace.

Facing each other, their legs entangled together as Arizona reached up to push brunette hair behind her wife's ear. "I love you, Calliope," she softly insisted.

Callie smiled at the sentiment, placing her hand at the back of a blonde head to pull Arizona closer to her. "I love you, too," she reverently whispered against pink lips before capturing them with her own.

As the kiss came to its gradual need, Arizona nuzzled her nose against her wife's and just as she was about to capture Callie's lips once more, the ringing of her pager halted her advance. "Errr! I hate that thing," she grumbled before sitting up on the edge of the bed to rip the offensive device from the bedside table.

Reading the display, her mouth fell open, her heart pounding in her chest as she hastily scrambled from the bed, her mind suddenly so immersed in her own thoughts and fears that she nearly tumbled to the floor when she carelessly put too much weight through her left leg.

Confused by her wife's hasty exit from the bed and the loss of balance she hadn't experienced in years, Callie too stood, following Arizona as quickly as she possibly could. "What's going on, Arizona?" she worriedly asked, crossing the room to stand next to her wife who had finally managed to get herself to the door unharmed.

Arizona turned toward her wife, her hand resting on the doorknob as tears welled in her eyes. "9-1-1 in the NICU. It's Olivia."


	6. Chapter 6

**Title**: Clarity

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: M/NC-17

**Summary**: Three years after the plane crash, Callie and Arizona have reconciled their differences and are now the happiest they've even been. With their relationship now stronger than ever, will the necessary presence of a face from the past tear them apart? Will their marriage stand up to life's latest tragedy or will they find that they are in the exact same position they were years before?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.**  
**

**AN: **Note the change in rating. Sexy time ensues. . .

* * *

_**Chapter Six**_

* * *

Arizona couldn't take her eyes off Callie's usually strong and steady hands that now trembled uncontrollably as she fumbled to don a pink gown outside the NICU doors. "Let me help," she softly stated when Callie failed twice to successfully tie her mask behind her head.

Relenting with an apologetic and almost embarrassed look on her face, Callie dropped her hands, sighing as Arizona stepped up behind her. "It's going to be okay," Arizona lovingly tried to reassure, leaving a lingering kiss at the nape of her wife's neck.

Arizona's words helped Callie's body to somewhat relax and, once they were wearing the appropriate attire, the two women shared a glance, apprehensive blue and disheartened brown glazing with fear as silent tears brimmed in both sets of eyes.

With an unspoken, but poignant message conveyed between the two, they found some semblance of resolve before instantly pushing through the door, rushing toward Olivia's clear plastic incubator that was now surrounded by two nurses and an anxious looking Alex Karev.

"What happened, Karev? Did she de-sat? Did. . ."

"She woke up pretty irritable, and we tried everything we could to soothe her. She had another seizure, Robbins, but we were able to manage it by increasing the Mannitol," Alex informed as he removed his stethoscope from where it rested against Olivia's tiny chest.

Immediately grabbing the electronic tablet from the younger doctor's hands, Arizona's eyes scanned up and down the screen, scrutinizing her baby girl's lab values and vital signs that had been collected over the past several hours.

"What now, Arizona?" Callie anxiously asked, taking a seat on the opposite side of the two pediatric surgeons, one relentlessly shaking hand immediately finding its way into the incubator to lovingly rub the skin on her daughter's arm. "We can't just keep letting her seize, and high doses of Mannitol can. . ."

"I know, Callie. I know," Arizona stated, trying desperately to keep her tone calm.

"I think we need to do the surgery as soon as possible. I don't think we should wait any longer," Alex interrupted.

"But, Dr. Boswell can't be here for a few more days, and I only want the best operating on our daughter," Callie argued in a whispered yell. "I refuse to settle for anything less."

Arizona once again couldn't take her eyes off the magnificent woman she called her wife. For a person who had only moments before been nearly paralyzed with the fear of what she might find upon entering the NICU doors, Calliope Torres now was the epitome of strength, courage, and determination and, refusing to break the gaze she now shared with her wife, Arizona nodded her head, swallowing hard before she spoke. "Call Boswell again, Karev. Tell her the board of Grey+Sloan Memorial Hospital will do anything they can to get her here sooner than next week."

* * *

_**(Flashback: Eighteen Months Ago)**_

_Callie lay silently staring up at the ceiling of the bedroom she once again shared with her wife. Arizona had moved back into the apartment a month prior and, while things were progressing rather smoothly, there was still a slight awkwardness that they hadn't quite been able to shake._

_"Arizona?" she softly called into the darkened room lit only by the silvery glow of the moon above and the street lights below. "You asleep?"_

_When the other woman - with her head nestled on a pillow and her left arm securely wrapped around her waist - didn't respond, Callie softly sighed, not wanting to awaken her slumbering wife. Rolling onto her side, she couldn't help but smile at the sight of blonde hair tousled in the sexiest of ways, a slight smile tugging at highly kissable pink lips. _

_Silently staring at the woman who had only recently returned to her bed, Callie's mind drifted over the past month. _

_When she had basically demanded Arizona move back in with her and Sofia during one of their joint therapy sessions, surprising not only her wife and counselor, but herself as well, Callie hadn't been prepared for the perilousness of sleeping with her wife again. And it wasn't about sex, but the actual act of sleeping, going to bed together. So many questions ran through her head that first night. Should she lie on her side? Her back? Maybe her belly? Should they cuddle with Arizona's back nestled into her front like they had done so many nights before? Should they talk? Should they share a lingering goodnight kiss?_

_Callie sighed at the thought of how awkward that first night and subsequent nights had been. It had never been like that for them. Even in the very beginning they hadn't felt unsure around each other, not even the first night they made love. It was tough going for a while, but now, they seemed to have it figured out. With each passing day, it became easier and more comfortable, less awkward and more natural for them to go to bed together._

_With her mind still racing, Callie reached out to gently tuck a stray strand of wavy blonde hair behind Arizona's ear. "Arizona?" she softly called again, unable to stop herself._

_Arizona's face flinched in response, her nose twitching in the cutest of ways. "Hmm?" she sleepily responded into the silence of the bedroom._

_Callie sighed, happy she at least had a bit of her wife's dreamily lethargic attention. "I'm sorry about earlier. I. . .I thought tonight would be the night, but. . ." she trailed off unsure of what else to say._

_Arizona's eyes moved behind closed lids before slowly blinking open. Without a word, she scooted closer to her wife, once again wrapping her arm around a curvy waist as she entangled her leg between Callie's. "It's okay," she softly insisted. "You have nothing to be sorry about."_

_Callie stared into listless, but completely honest eyes, and even though she wasn't sure Arizona would remember this conversation in the morning, she decided to continue. "I just. . .I don't want you to think that I don't want to, because I do," she earnestly whispered, never once breaking their gaze. "You're beautiful, Arizona, and I love you so much. I'm just. . .I'm not ready."_

_Blue eyes now appeared more alert as they gazed into moist chocolate brown and, pulling her right arm from beneath her pillow, Arizona reached forward with both hands to gently pull Callie's face closer to her own. Nuzzling their noses together, she then captured plump lips in a gentle massage as she tried to convey all the love and respect she felt for her beautiful wife with the simple, but intimate joining of their lips._

_Callie responded in kind, never tiring of kissing the gorgeous woman lying next to her and, when the kiss came to its gradual end, both women opened their eyes, a silent understanding transpiring between them. "You're miraculous, Calliope. Breathtakingly stunning. . ." Arizona husked before placing another kiss against the corner of her wife's mouth. "I would never pressure you into anything. I love you, Callie, and I will wait for you as long as you need."_

* * *

"Okay, so my parents are going to pick Sofia up from school, and then bring her back here. Your parents are going to take her to dinner while mine do a little grocery shopping. Once you and I get back to the hospital, you can stay with Olivia while I go to the board meeting at five," Arizona rambled on as she moved about the master bedroom of their house, pulling socks, underwear, and a bra from her top dresser drawer before moving into the walk-in closet. "I'm not sure what you did to get Bailey to discharge you, but whatever it was obviously worked," she continued as she perused the line of sweaters hanging on her side of the closet.

Callie sat silently on the foot of their king-size bed, barely listening to her wife, her attention more focused on the incessant thoughts that loudly ran through her head.

"Do you want to shower first? Or should I?" Arizona asked, stepping out of the closet with a pair of jeans and a royal blue turtle neck sweater draped over her arms.

When she received no response, Arizona halted in her anxious movement to take in the apprehension that now radiated from her wife's every feature. Noting that her wife hadn't moved since entering the bedroom and realizing she hadn't spoken more than ten words during or since their drive home from the hospital, she slowly stepped to the side to deposit her clothing in a pile atop the bureau before hesitantly making her way to sit next to her introspective wife.

Reaching out to envelope Callie's hand between her own, she pulled their joined hands upward to lay a gentle kiss against tanned knuckles. "Olivia's going to be fine, Calliope. She's. . ."

"I thought I had the next five days to get this all sorted out in my head," Callie softly interrupted, staring out ahead of her. "I was going to spend as much time with you and our daughters as I possibly could. I was going to gather my strength and. . .my courage. I was going to give myself pep talks, and I was going to rally and do everything I possibly could to come to terms with the fact that I'm going to have to see _her_ again. . ." Callie trailed off, aimlessly picking a piece of lint from her yoga pants with her free hand. "But now, my plan has been shot to Hell, because I don't have five days. I barely have five hours, and I. . .I'm not sure I'm ready."

Arizona swallowed hard, knowing exactly what Callie was referring to and, if she was honest with herself, she wasn't sure she was ready either.

When Alex had again gotten in contact with Dr. Boswell the night before, the craniofacial specialist had consented to arriving in Seattle the following day, four days prior to her original plans.

Which led them to their current position.

Breathing deeply and exhaling via pursed lips, Arizona released Callie's hand, reaching up with ivory fingertips to guide her wife's face in her direction. Once she was absolutely sure she had Callie's attention, she smiled softly as she tipped her head to the side. "I'm not going to lie to you and tell you this is going to be easy. In fact, it's going to be one of the most difficult things you and I have ever had to face, but I have one hundred percent faith in us, Calliope. We're committed to each other _and_ to our family. We are in love. We're strong, Callie, so strong, and when together, we're a force to be reckoned with."

Large tears welled in magical brown eyes as she listened to Arizona's passionate and heartfelt speech and, unable to stop herself, Callie leaned in, taking pink lips into a hard and insistent kiss, her hands tangling in blonde hair to hold her wife close. Pushing forward, her kiss became more passionate and more forceful, one hand dropping from Arizona's hair to slip beneath her shirt, trailing up the smooth skin of a taut abdomen to cup a satin covered breast.

"Whoa, wait," Arizona husked against increasingly urgent lips. "Callie. What are you doing?" she panted, grasping onto her wife's roaming hand to hold it at bay. "You just had a baby. We can't do this."

Leaning back slightly, Callie gazed into questioning blue eyes, the intensity of the want and desire in her own needy brown ones boring into the furthest recesses of Arizona's soul. "She's coming back, Arizona. Tonight. And in just a few short hours, I'm going to have to face the woman who nearly ruined my life. And I. . .I can't do that. Not before I make love to you. I need to have you. I need to know you're mine. I need to know that we're _together_, and that we. . .that we're one."

Large tears instantly stung at bright azure eyes at the vulnerability she saw in Callie's eyes, the unguarded tone of her husky voice. Her wife was laying herself bare; she was completely unarmed, thoroughly exposed in every way. Arizona wasn't sure she had ever seen Callie so defenseless, so vulnerable, and that honestly scared her to death.

But, nodding her head, she squeezed a caramel hand, pulling the brunette up to stand directly in front of her. With their faces so close they were breathing the exact same air, Arizona softly spoke, her mouth moving against plump lips. "Take me."

* * *

_**(Flashback: Seventeen Months Ago)**_

_"So, things are going well?" the therapist questioned, a genuine smile on her face as she looked across the room toward Arizona who sat in her usual spot on the leather couch._

_"Yes," Arizona agreed with a nod of her head. "I think Callie and I have made amazing progress over the past couple months. More so since I moved back into the apartment," she continued, her voice sounding happy, but her demeanor proving otherwise._

_The counselor crossed her legs at her ankles, tapping her pen against the pages secured on her clipboard. She sat silently watching her patient and, when Arizona didn't take that as an implication for her to continue, she once again spoke. "You don't seem completely pleased with the way things are going at home," she offered._

_Arizona immediately snapped to attention, her brow furrowing in confusion as she considered her therapist's statement. "Of course I'm happy. I'm living with my wife and daughter, again. It's all I've wanted for so long. Being without them. . .either of them. . .was misery."_

_The counselor nodded in understanding, but she had been working with Arizona for months and could tell when the younger woman wasn't being completely honest with her. . .and herself._

_Becoming more and more uncomfortable as her therapist continued to scrutinize her, Arizona rolled her eyes nervously shifting her weight on the sofa. "Things are going really well. Better than I could have ever expected, but it's just. . .there's just. . .this one little thing," she finally admitted, holding her fingers up to measure an inch._

_When the other woman once again sat quietly, Arizona cleared her throat, knowing she needed to continue. "Callie and I. . .we haven't. . .she and I haven't. . .made love since before the affair. We umm, we've tried. . .we've gotten close, but she's still holding back. She's just not ready, and I get that. I really, really do. I would never force her into doing anything that made her uncomfortable, and I know I need to leave this up to her. It's her call for when we take this final step, but I'm just. . .I'm just so worried we'll never be able to reconnect on that level," she honestly admitted as her cerulean eyes began to twinkle with unshed tears. "I would do anything for Callie. Anything in the world, but if we can't do this - if she never trusts me enough to let me in, in that sense - then what do I do?"_

_The therapist nodded her head, completely understanding her patient's confusion and uncertainty. "Sex is one of the most intimate things about a marriage and, unfortunately Arizona, you broke the rules by having sex with someone else. . ."_

_Arizona huffed, opening her mouth to speak, but was immediately cut off._

_"I know you already know that, but what I'm saying is. . .this isn't exclusive to you and your marriage. One of the most troublesome things to deal with when reconciling after an affair is how to have sex with your spouse. But, the good news is, there's a way through it. You're just going to have to work through this with Callie. Slowly and gently, until both of you are ready to begin making love as you did before."_

* * *

_Stepping off the elevator an hour later and rounding the corner on her way toward the blue door of apartment 502, Arizona inhaled deeply at the intoxicating scent of some kind of freshly baked good that wafted through the hallway. Smiling as she inhaled deeply, she fished her keys from within her bag before unlocking the door and pushing her way through._

_Once again breathing in an exaggerated breath, she tossed her purse and jacket onto the couch before giving the apartment further inspection. Noting the lights throughout the entire apartment to be slightly dimmed, she then spotted two taper candles on the kitchen island and Callie leaning against the sink with a bottle of beer in her hand._

_"Hey," Arizona softly greeted, stepping around the bar to place a gentle kiss against Callie's cheek._

_"Hey," Callie returned, enjoying the tingles of lust that surged through her entire body at the lingering sensation of Arizona's lips on her skin. "How was your session?" she asked, turning from her wife to offer her a beer from within the refrigerator._

_Accepting the proffered beverage, Arizona then hopped up on a high stool, content to watch her wife move around the kitchen as she chopped vegetables for a salad. "It was. . .good," she vaguely replied. "Where's Sofia?" she then asked, her attention scanning the apartment for the generally noisily exuberant child._

_Callie took a long draw from her beer before setting it to the side. "She's spending the night with the McDreamy's. Meredith is going to take her to dance class with Zola in the morning, and I told her we would meet them there," she innocently stated, jumping slightly when the oven's timer let out a shrill ding._

_Arizona's eyes narrowed as she curiously watched Callie turn away from her, hoping beyond hope that she was about to pull out what she thought could possibly be baking inside that oven. Shifting nervously as her wife donned two oversized oven mitts before opening the door, she couldn't help the dimpled grin that consumed her entire face when her gorgeous wife turned around with her offering._

_"I made half pesto and prosciutto and half pepperoni and extra cheese," Callie stated, setting the steaming hot pan of homemade crust, meat, and cheeses on a tile trivet to cool._

_"Looks amazing," Arizona complimented, leaning up on her elbows to breathe in the pizza's scent._

_Callie smiled at her thoroughly pleased wife and, when blue eyes flicked up to meet chocolate brown, she couldn't help but notice that Arizona's eyes had darkened slightly, twinkling seductively in the candle light. "We haven't had homemade pizza in a while, so I thought tonight could be. . .the night."_

_Arizona found herself speechless at the smoldering look in Callie's nearly obsidian eyes and, reaching out for her wife's hand, she brought it to her mouth to lay a reverent kiss against the band of white gold and diamonds encircling her left ring finger. "Sounds to me like it's going to be a great night."_

* * *

Taking her wife's hand, Arizona slowly led Callie into the ensuite bathroom, coming to a halt directly in front of her in the middle of the floor. Without a word spoken, she took one of Callie's hands into her own, placing it directly over her beating heart. "My heart beats. . .only for you," she earnestly whispered before leaning in to intimately join her lips with Callie's, the taller woman's free hand tangling in blonde locks to hold Arizona close.

Pulling back slightly, the blonde gently nuzzled her nose against her wife's before reaching down for the hem of Callie's t-shirt to pull it up and over her head, but the taller woman halted her advances, tugging Arizona's shirt off instead. Hungry chocolate eyes immediately landed on the silky material of a black bra before roaming caramel hands made quick work of it, as well.

Callie studied the way her wife's chest rose and fell with each breath, thoroughly enthralled by the way the skin around her nipples tightened in obvious arousal. Leaning down slightly, she brought one delicious bud into her mouth, sucking lightly at the sensitive tip before slowly moving her tongue over it.

Arizona's mouth opened with a sharp intake of breath, a gasp resembling Callie's name falling from parted lips as the brunette continued to flick an insistent tongue over her nipple before kissing her way over to the next one, thoroughly attending to it as she had done its mate.

Gazing back up into darkening azure eyes, Callie held Arizona's gaze for several long moments before stepping away to turn on the faucet, the spray of hot water from the shower stall soon sending a cloud of steam billowing throughout the room.

* * *

_Pressing Arizona through the kitchen and into their bedroom, Callie's lips never left her wife's as they stumbled through the open bedroom door. Losing herself - and her control - as she reveled in the flavor of the pizza and beer that lingered on Callie's full lips, Arizona forced herself to pull away, slightly shaking her head and taking Callie's hands into her own to slow their passionate ministrations. She could tell her wife was nervous; she was, too, but Callie's nerves had manifested into quick and forceful movements and kisses that Arizona knew she needed to slow down. _

_This wasn't going to be quick. This wasn't going to be just sex. Arizona was going to make love to her wife. She was going to show her there was definitely a difference. She was going to take her time and be everything her wife needed and all she deserved. What they BOTH needed and deserved._

_Stepping back, Arizona paused, her eyes raking up and down her wife's clothed body; the tight black jeans and blouse she wore, leaving little to the imagination. "You're stunning, Calliope," she husked, taking a step closer to the woman she loved. "And I want so badly to make love to you right now. I want to show you how much I love you, and I. . .we're going to take our time."_

_Callie stared down into Arizona's almost pleading eyes and with a nearly imperceptible nod, she dropped her arms to her sides, surrendering herself to the woman she loved more than life itself. Taking a deep cleansing breath to calm her raging emotions, she squeezed her wife's hand when the shorter woman tugged her toward their bed._

* * *

Closing her eyes, Callie leaned her face against the tile wall of the shower, letting the water pound into her skin, loosening the knots and tension that seemed to consume her entire form.

A gust of cool air caused brown eyes to snap open as she watched her naked wife enter the shower before closing the door behind her. "Arizona? Your leg," she whispered when she saw that her wife was still wearing her prosthesis.

Arizona didn't speak, reaching up to lightly press her index finger against Callie's lips to halt her concern before kissing a caramel shoulder blade. Wrapping an arm around her wife's waist and enjoying the sensation of her own breasts pressed so intimately against Callie's back, pink lips then busied themselves against a tanned neck, biting softly into the soft flesh near her shoulder.

Grabbing a bottle of shampoo, Arizona then poured a generous amount into the palm of her hand, running her fingers through thick brunette hair and curling them into her scalp to massage away the stress of the past several days. Pulling Callie away from the wall, she pushed her under the steaming spray of the shower to thoroughly rinse the soap from thick locks, watching intently as the suds slid down her shoulders and over the swell of her breasts.

Callie's arousal skyrocketed as she watched Arizona hungrily lick her lips and, unable to control herself for a moment longer, she grabbed her wife's shoulders to forcefully turn them around.

* * *

_Arizona knelt atop the mattress mirroring her wife who did the same and, slipping her hands to the hem of her shirt, she seductively tugged on her sweater before slowly pulling it up, inch by inch to reveal pristine alabaster skin. With her eyes never straying from Callie's, she tossed it to the side, her hands then moving behind her to unclasp her bra._

_With her upper body now naked to Callie's eyes, Arizona paused, allowing her wife to take her in. Darkening chocolate eyes first wandered over perfectly rounded breasts, then downward toward a taut abdomen before the taller woman reached forward, tangling her hand through wavy blonde hair to tug her wife close, meeting her lips in a bruising kiss._

_When the heated kiss came to an untimely end, fair hands made quick work of Callie's shirt before toying with the front clasp of a lacy black bra and, with heaving breasts now freed to her, Arizona leaned forward, kissing the hollow of her wife's throat before taking a heavy breast into each of her palms. _

_Worshiping Callie's neck and chest, Arizona felt her libido soar when she heard a ragged moan above her, a sound she knew she would never tire of hearing in a million years. "I love your body, Calliope," she husked against smooth skin before leaning back to once again stare into her wife's eyes. "You're gorgeous."_

_Callie blinked, uncomfortable under her wife's scrutiny and, blushing at the compliment, she ducked her head, staring down at the plush duvet covering their bed._

_Tipping her head to the side as she considered the uneasy woman kneeling before her, Arizona reached out with her hand, trembling fingertips pressing Callie's chin upward so that she could look into her eyes._

_When tearful brown eyes finally flicked to meet deepening blue, Arizona shifted closer to her wife, snaking one arm around her neck as the other came up to brush at the lone tear that streaked down her face. "I want you, Calliope. I need you. Only you. Now. And forever," she honestly stated, once again pausing to search expressive brown eyes. "No one else."_

_Callie couldn't take her eyes off her wife and, finding nothing but honesty in every last one of her delicate features, she softly spoke. "Show me."_

* * *

Arizona gasped when her back met the cool shower wall, her eyes falling shut when two needy hands caressed the sides of her face, ravaging lips laying purchase on her own.

With her hands moving from her wife's cheeks, Callie gently massaged down the sides of Arizona's neck as she caught her lower lip between her teeth, exerting enough pressure just to tease her, her arms then snaking further down a slim waist to take Arizona's wrists, pinning them to the wall behind her, watching mesmerized as her breasts became more prominent from the change in her posture.

Placing a gentle kiss against one turgid nipple and then the other, Callie then insinuated her knees between long pale legs to gently force them apart. Urgently locking her eyes with uneasy blue ones, Callie felt her arousal increase from smoldering embers to a raging inferno; she needed to _have_ this woman, to claim her. She needed to be sure that she was hers and always would be.

Arizona offered no resistance, her head falling backward against the tiles as Callie once again kissed up her chest and neck but, when she felt Arizona's hands only come to rest at her hips, she pulled back, her eyes pleading. "Please, Arizona. I need you. I need to know that you're mine."

Gentle fingertips reverently traced the new surgical incision at the top of her wife's pubic area; the wound that had given life to their brand new baby girl. "I don't want to hurt you, Calliope," Arizona softly stated, her hand continuing to aimlessly run over the steri-strips holding her wife's skin together. "I'd never be able to forgive myself if I. . ."

"She's going to be here, Arizona. That woman. She's. . ."

Arizona shook her head, holding up her hand to halt her wife's worries. "I don't want _her_, Calliope. I want _you. _Only _you_," she adamantly whispered, reaching up to wipe droplets from her wife's brow before trailing a singular fingertip down her cheek bone, wiping at a tear that blinked from her pleading eyes. "I love you, Calliope. So much. I'm yours," she lovingly insisted, her cerulean gaze boring into chocolate brown as her hand drifted between Callie's legs to cup her mound, squeezing it softly.

"Arizona," Callie gasped, her forehead falling forward to rest on Arizona's shoulder as ivory fingers trailed up and down her inner thighs, drawing unknown abstract patterns into velvety smooth skin.

* * *

_Lying down on the pillows, Arizona watched Callie do the same but, when the brunette reached out to turn off the bedside lamp, she halted her, grasping her hand and lacing their fingers together. "No hiding," Arizona insisted as she lowered herself down to lie next to her now completely naked wife. "It's just me. And I. . .I want to see you. No more hiding. For either of us," she repeated in a husky whisper. "Not anymore."_

_Callie bit her bottom lip feeling more exposed than she ever had before but, with a nod of her head, she glanced down between their bodies, thoroughly captivated by the view of Arizona's naked body straddling her hips._

_Gazing down at her wife, Arizona paused, watching as trembling hands hesitated to touch her body before dropping to land at Callie's sides._

_Pushing brunette hair back from a caramel forehead, Arizona refused to look anywhere but directly into Callie's eyes as she spoke. "Please touch me, Calliope. I love the way your hands feel on my body," she supplied, hoping to calm her wife's nerves._

_Callie swallowed hard, slowly raising her hands from where they were bunched in the duvet, but she once again paused in apprehension, in fear of rejection and disapproval._

_"Please," Arizona once again requested, disheartened cerulean eyes growing moist with tears but, gathering all the courage and determination she could muster from deep within herself, she pushed through, taking tanned hands into her own to place them over her hips._

_Callie sucked in a quick breath at the sensation of the hot, satiny skin that now rested beneath her palms, her body visibly relaxing; all the tension and all the uncertainty of what they were about to do slowly beginning to escape her._

_Arizona worried her own bottom lip between her teeth as Callie's hands became more resolute, sliding around to rest on her bottom before tugging her center closer to her own. With an insistent downward thrust of her hips, Arizona then leaned forward, aroused nipples caressing aroused nipples, heated centers molding together as one._

* * *

Callie bit down on Arizona's shoulder when she felt two hesitant fingers brushed against her pulsing bundle of nerves, her own fingers slipping between her wife's heated folds, a cursed expletive falling from Arizona's lips as they breached her entrance.

Arizona nipped and sucked at Callie's chest, her roving tongue drinking in the droplets of water from the shower that ran down her wife's neck to mingle with the salty sweet sweat that gathered there. Moving downward, she took a darkened nipple into her mouth, licking it with broad strokes of her tongue before switching sides. "Please tell me if you're uncomfortable or if I'm hurting you," she earnestly beseeched.

Callie nodded her head, her fingers forcing their way further inside her wife's slippery depths. "I'm okay," she breathlessly insisted. "But. . .I'll tell you. I promise."

Even though the baby had been delivered via cesarean, Arizona remained apprehensive of penetrating her wife so soon after the birth of their daughter, but satisfied with Callie's response, slim ivory fingers were content to draw deliberate circles over a greedy clit as she blazed a trail of hot kisses up a caramel chest, her lips coming to rest near Callie's ear. "You feel incredible inside me. I love being wrapped around your fingers," she husked, enjoying the sensation of their cheeks pressed so lovingly together.

With her fingers never hitching in their reverently perfect in and out cadence, her thumb forcefully brushing over a protruding clit, Callie harshly bit down on Arizona's earlobe, causing the woman to buck against her, screaming her name.

"Callie!" Arizona cried, her free hand incessantly grasping at her wife's rounded bottom to hold her as close as possible.

Lost in a whirlwind of need and want, ecstasy and love, fear and survival, Callie forcefully pushed at the socket of Arizona's prosthesis to rid it from her body. "I love you, Arizona. Don't stop. Please don't ever stop," she groaned, hooking her arm under her wife's residual limb to possessively hold it against her hip.

* * *

_"I love you, Calliope," Arizona whispered into Callie's ear, their lower bodies writhing together in perfect harmony. "Just hearing you breathe. . .sends shivers down my spine," she murmured, picking up the pace and thrusting against Callie harder and more frantically with every passing moment._

_Callie's hands grasped at Arizona's back, her fingernails leaving crescent shaped indentations up and down the long muscles of her wife's spine. "I love feeling you on top of me, Arizona. You feel. . .so good," Callie groaned, her breath catching in her throat as an unexpected sob fell from her lips._

_Leaning upward with her forearms that rested on either side of her wife's head, Arizona stared down at Callie's closed eyes, her heart breaking when she saw tears streaming down caramel cheeks. "Open your eyes, Calliope. I want you to look at me. I need you to see me, and I want to see you."_

_Callie's eyes slowly opened, her top teeth digging into her bottom lip as she raced closer and closer to the edge. "You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I love you with all my heart," Arizona humbly whispered as she kissed away the moisture on her wife's face. "Please don't cry."_

_Reaching up with one hand, Callie gently brushed at the identical tears that now glistened in beautiful azure eyes as they slid down her wife's face, before tugging her down into an insistent kiss. "I love you too, Arizona. So much."_

* * *

Arizona's body arched harshly, the back of her head coming in contact with the cool tiles of the shower wall. "Oh God, baby. . .so close. . ." she husked, her fingers tangling and gripping tightly onto the brunette hair at the back of her wife's head.

Callie hummed against Arizona's neck, one arm holding a slippery limb around her right hip as the other forced two fingers into her pulsing center, the blonde's hips bucking wildly as her thumb firmly massaged deliberate circles over Callie's erect clit.

As hoarse moans and seductive groans echoed over the sound of the stream of water spraying from the shower head, two lovers doubled the efforts of their individual hands, Callie's teeth sinking into Arizona's clavicle to mark her as her own.

"I need you so much, Arizona. God, I need you. . ." Callie begged. Her voice was emotional. It was raw. It was pleading and, pulling Arizona's face toward her own, she forced their lips together in an intimate tryst of needy lips and probing tongues.

"I'm yours, Calliope. Only yours," Arizona stated, pulling back slightly from the bruising kiss. "I'm here. I'm right here."

* * *

_"Oh, God!" Callie gasped, the tears she had been unable to hold at bay continuing to slide down her face as she felt Arizona thrusting down against her, her own hips moving upward, meeting the sensual rocking of her wife's heated core._

_"I'm so close. . ."_

_"Me too. Keep going. Please don't stop," Callie begged, her eyes falling tightly shut._

_Both women moved in sync, their bodies instinctively knowing what the other craved and, as if out of nowhere, Callie's body contracted tightly before beginning to tremble uncontrollably as an explosion of shattering release flooded her entire body. "God, yes! Arizona!"_

_"So good. You feel so good," Arizona mumbled and, with their cheeks pressed firmly together, ivory skin against caramel flesh, her body soon went rigid with ecstasy as she forced herself down against Callie one last time. "Ca-Calliope!" she shouted into the room before collapsing on top of her wife as one sweat slickened body continued to convulse and jerk against the other._

_Callie's back continued to arch off the bed, her mouth opening to release another choked scream when Arizona's hips relentlessly continued to circle against her core, milking every last bit of orgasmic pleasure she could from within her lover's body._

_Physically breathless and emotionally spent, Arizona finally rolled off her wife and, feeling Callie's hot breath on her neck as her head came to rest on her shoulder, she reached up to wipe at the hot tears that continued to escape her eyes with one hand as the other lovingly smoothed through Callie's hair. "Thank you so much for tonight, Callie. Thank you for trusting me. Thank you for letting me back in."_

_Kissing Arizona's jawline, Callie then leaned up on her elbow so that she could stare down at her beautifully sex tousled wife. "Thank you for your patience, Arizona. And, thank you for coming back to me."_

* * *

Arizona cursed into the shower, her left thigh sliding from Callie's hip as the last pulsating wave of pleasure left her body, her arms wrapping tightly around her wife's torso for support.

Callie's body sagged against her wife, trapping Arizona against the wall, her arms falling limply to her sides as the water from the shower continued to pelt their overly heated bodies. "Please don't leave, Arizona. Can you just. . .hold me? For a minute? I. . .I'm not ready."

Arizona pulled back from where her lips peppered gentle kisses against Callie's neck and, once she was sure her wife wasn't in any kind of physical pain from the exertion of their love making, she searched Callie's flushed face, watching as tears brimmed in sad and confused chocolate eyes. "I'll stay here for as long as you need," she whispered against plump lips, one hand smoothing though saturated brunette hair. "I'm here, Calliope, and I'm not going anywhere. Ever again."

* * *

"Is she bigger?" Callie asked, her eyes lovingly scanning the length of Olivia's nearly five pound form. "She looks bigger."

Arizona smiled, leaning her head against Callie's shoulder and, wrapping one arm around her wife's waist, the other came to rest on her thigh as they sat side by side facing their daughter's incubator. "We were only gone for a couple hours, Callie. I doubt she's bigger, but hey. . .she might be," she teased, placing a chaste kiss against Callie's cheek.

Callie continued to stare at their daughter, one hand positioned protectively atop the baby's head, the other gently caressing the skin of a tiny leg. "I can't get over how much she looks like Sofia," she mused, leaning back against her wife.

Arizona nodded in agreement as she lovingly rubbed her palm up and down Callie's leg. "Both of my girls are beautiful. Just like their Mami," she replied, winking at Callie who had turned slightly to face her.

With an embarrassed roll of her eyes, Callie pecked Arizona's lips before turning back to take in every single movement Olivia made, each rise and fall of her chest, every kick of her tiny feet and wave of her little arms. Sighing, Callie realized she could do this forever; she would be content to sit and watch the small child every hour of every day.

But, just as the sight of Olivia's rhythmic breathing was about to lull her into complete relaxation, the sound of a familiar gravelly voice caught her attention.

Feeling Arizona stiffen behind her, Callie instantly froze, completely unsure of what to do.

Should she just sit there and pretend she hadn't heard the voice of the person she despised most in the world? Or should she gather all her defenses, turn around, and face the bitch head on?

"We're in this together," she heard Arizona whisper into her ear.

Closing her alarmed eyes and swallowing the giant lump that had taken up residence in her throat, Callie breathed deeply as her wife pressed a lingering kiss against her temple.

"We're going to be okay."

Hearing footsteps behind them, Arizona hugged Callie from behind before taking her hand and turning them both around on their stools to face whoever had approached.

The tall, slender craniofacial specialist who walked next to Alex Karev quickly halted in her stride upon seeing the stoic look on Arizona's face and, smiling nervously, she softly cleared her throat. "Arizona," she greeted, refusing to look from the blonde to meet Callie's threatening glare. "I was hoping I would be working this case with you."

Arizona's stomach ached, painfully twisting as bile rose in the back of her throat but, feeling Callie flinch at her side, she knew she needed to be strong. She needed to be level headed. She needed to get her family through this. "Sorry, Dr. Boswell. This isn't my patient," she replied, standing to her full height and pulling Callie along with her.

Lauren swallowed hard when she finally allowed her gaze to flick in Callie's direction but, smiling a sickenly sweet smile, she waved her hand. "Oh, I just assumed. . .since you were here, that. . ." she trailed off, glancing down to read from the electronic tablet she held in her hand, "_baby Olivia_ was your patient."

Squeezing Arizona's hand, Callie cleared her throat in order to find her voice. "No, Dr. Boswell. Olivia _isn't_ Arizona's patient," she repeated her wife's earlier statement. "In fact, she can't be. Because. . .she's _our_ daughter."


	7. Chapter 7

**Title**: Clarity

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: M/NC-17

**Summary**: Three years after the plane crash, Callie and Arizona have reconciled their differences and are now the happiest they've even been. With their relationship now stronger than ever, will the necessary presence of a face from the past tear them apart? Will their marriage stand up to life's latest tragedy or will they find that they are in the exact same position they were years before?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Seven**_

* * *

Lying awake with her face nestled into the crook of Arizona's neck, Callie sighed, breathing in the scent of her wife's shampoo and perfume as she tried to make herself comfortable on the small on-call room bed. "Did you see the look on her face when I told her Olivia was _our_ daughter?" she questioned, her tone jovial as she lifted her head so she could gaze down into her wife's blue eyes. "I'm pretty sure she swallowed her own tongue and maybe even threw up a little in her mouth."

Arizona didn't say a word, her lips only momentarily curling into a slight smile before instantly falling back down into a thin line.

"That face. Oh my God. I don't think I would have missed that for the world," Callie continued, tipping her head back with a slight chuckle before burrowing her head back onto the pillow she was sharing with her wife. Closing her eyes and kissing Arizona's cheek, Callie then wrapped her right arm around her wife's waist, once again attempting to find a satisfactory position.

Lying in silence for several long moments, the only sound in the room coming from the sighs that repeatedly breached Arizona's lips, Callie once again leaned up on her elbow to look down at her wife. When Arizona still remained silent, her body completely rigid and unmoved by Callie's loving touch, the brunette finally decided to speak. "Talk to me, Arizona," she softly beseeched. "Tell me what's going on up here," she urged, gently tapping at her wife's temple with the pad of her index finger.

Arizona shook her head, her eyes falling shut. "Just worried about Olivia," she vaguely replied before sitting straight up and swinging her legs over the side of the bed. "I think maybe I should go spend the night with her in the NICU. Just in case."

Callie sat up in the middle of the mattress and, reaching out to stop her wife from exiting the small bed, she quickly found her hand, lacing their fingers together. "Please don't do this, Arizona. Please don't pull away from me. Not now."

Arizona paused, her posture stiff and unyielding as she listened to the underlying hurt in Callie's words but, with a deep inhalation that she then blew out via pursed lips, her body soon relaxed, becoming more pliable before Callie's eyes.

Arizona was content to continue staring away from her wife for a moment longer but, when she felt Callie squeeze her hand, she relented, moving backward to sit on the edge of the bed.

Callie didn't say a word, allowing Arizona the time she needed to process whatever was going on in her head and, running a soothing hand up and down the expanse of her wife's back, the brunette then laid a benevolent kiss against the back of a blonde head. "Talk to me, Arizona. I want to know what you're thinking."

Finally turning back to look at her wife, Arizona searched Callie's face, finding all the strength she needed to speak just by gazing into Callie's expressive brown eyes. "I'm sorry, Callie. I was thinking about. . .Dr. Boswell. I was. . ."

"You were. . ._thinking_ about her?" Callie dejectedly questioned, hurt and fear evident in the waver of her voice and the moisture that instantly welled in her eyes.

With a shocked look on her face, Arizona shook her head. "No, Calliope. Not like that. That's not what I meant."

Moving from her knees to sit Indian style atop the thin hospital issued blanket, Callie looked down toward her own trembling fingers that now aimlessly fidgeted with her wedding ring. "What _did_ you mean?"

Arizona sighed, mentally chastising herself for once again being the cause of Callie's insecurities when they had worked so hard to move past them and, ducking her head, she forced tearful brown eyes to meet her cerulean gaze. "I was thinking about. . ._before_. About how I never should have let things get so bad," she honestly admitted with a rueful smile when Callie's eyes reluctantly flitted upward. "I'm not sure what I thought would happen when I saw her again, but tonight, in the NICU, when I saw her, I felt. . ._nothing_. Nothing other than disgust in myself for being so weak and for letting her get to me before."

Callie searched Arizona's face, unsure of exactly what she was looking for but, seeing nothing but honesty and care mixed with uncertain foreboding and tribulation written across her every feature, she reached forward to take the sides of her wife's face into her hands. "No more thinking about _before_, Arizona. You just. . .you can't keep punishing yourself over and over again for what happened, sweetheart. Neither of us can," she earnestly stated as she gently glided her thumbs up and down over moist cheekbones. "No more rehashing our past mistakes, okay? We've already found our solution. We know what happened. We may not like it, but we fixed it. It's time to live in the present, Arizona and not dwell on the past."

* * *

_**(Flashback: Nineteen Months Ago)**_

_The counselor couldn't help the slight smile that tugged at her lips at the sight of the blonde and brunette who sat on the brown leather sofa across from her. _

_Throughout the month and a half they had been attending sessions together, their demeanors had drastically changed; in the beginning they attempted to stay as far away from each other as physically possible, but now, they sat side by side on the sofa with less than a foot separating them._

_"We did what you asked," Arizona admitted, her hands anxiously tugging at the front of the grey tab collar jacket she was wearing. "We, umm. . .we each made a list of things that are special about each other and discussed them over dinner," she continued, her tone nervous as she glanced toward Callie who seemed to be a million miles away. "I thought it. . .went well."_

_Arizona and the therapist then expectantly looked toward Callie who sat silently staring at an indiscriminate spot behind the eldest woman's head. _

_"Callie? Is there anything you'd like to add?" the counselor tried to lead._

_With a minor shake of her head, Callie squinted her eyes as she was pulled from the silent reverie she'd been submerged in since the beginning of their session. "Oh, umm. . .yeah. It went well."_

_Upon hearing Callie's vague response, Arizona felt her heart begin to race, her stomach churning as bile rose in the back of her throat and, with her shoulders slouching in sorrow and dejection, she swallowed hard. She had been so excited two nights ago after her first official "date" with Callie since the affair, a dimpled grin refusing to leave her face even after she'd changed her clothes and settled herself into bed. She was downright giddy. She felt like a moony-eyed school girl who had just spent the evening with her high school crush. She was quite simply. . .ecstatic. _

_They had talked and laughed as they shared a bottle of wine over their dinner of gourmet French cuisine and had even engaged in a slightly awkward, but thoroughly enjoyable goodnight kiss on Callie's doorstep at the end of the night, but now, considering the pensive and introspective look in Callie's eyes, all of Arizona's hopes and dreams were expeditiously being sucked right out from under her. _

_Glancing between the two wives and sensing the blonde's worry nearing a boiling point, the counselor decided to intervene. "What did you think about Arizona's list, Callie? Did you believe the things she was saying to be true?"_

_Allowing her contemplative eyes to finally focus on the therapist, Callie nodded her head, lacing her fingers together on her lap. "I. . .yes. I believed everything Arizona was saying, and I. . .I really believe she's truly sorry for what happened. She's been very patient and invested in making sure I'm fully healed." _

_"But?" Arizona asked, unable to stop herself as she became increasingly more uncomfortable with where Callie's revelation seemed to be leading them._

_Callie's waywardly fluctuating attention quickly snapped in Arizona's direction upon hearing her shaky interruption and, with a heavy sigh, she decided to continue. "We both let things get out of control. There was just so much uncertainty in our lives. I woke up every morning waiting for the other shoe to drop, and I believe Arizona was just. . .lost. In anger a-a-and grief, and. . .I tried, but there really wasn't anything I could do to help," she recalled, repeating some of the conversation she and Arizona had shared during their date. "But, I really. . .I just. . .I've come to the point in my life where I've finally realized that I need to be kind to myself. I. . .I need to listen to my heart and trust my head, because really, that's all I have. That's what's going to get me through this."_

_Arizona visibly recoiled in her seat, her mouth falling open to protest, though she was completely unable to formulate words. This was it; this was where Callie was going to ask for a divorce or some kind of dissolution of their marriage, and she knew without a doubt that she was going to vomit at any moment. It was inevitable; she could feel her stomach beginning to convulse as her mouth filled with saliva but, before she could stand up to dash out of the counselor's office toward the nearest restroom, Callie beat her to it. _

_Once on her feet, the brunette crossed the room in an anxiously paced circuit before turning around to walk back toward the sofa. "It wasn't just Arizona. We both were so, so lost. I felt that I'd completely failed her, and she just couldn't see past the disability. This has helped, though. The couple's therapy has been great and, to be honest, we should have been sitting in this office way before now," she honestly rambled, nervously wringing her hands together in front of her. "Because for our entire relationship, we've always tried to avoid conflict. We've constantly moved on without ever really dealing with our underlying issues," she paused, considering her words. "But we can't do that this time. We just can't, so this has been good. Amazing, actually."_

_Arizona sat stock still in her seat, her eyes shifting from side to side as she tried to anticipate what would be next to come spilling out of Callie's mouth. She loved Callie more than anything, but when she got going on a horribly tangential speech; when her beautiful mouth moved at a much faster rate than the thoughts swarming about in her pretty little head could be formed, she found herself at a complete loss. It was absolutely maddening._

_"I'm glad you've found the couple's therapy helpful, Callie," the counselor stated, also unsure of where the brunette was going with her line of thinking. "But would you care to elaborate? I think Arizona and I are both a little confused."_

_Arizona nodded at the therapist, swallowing hard against the giant lump that had taken up residence in her throat, stubbornly refusing to vacate the premises. _

_Callie scratched the side of her head, her hands then flamboyantly moving as she spoke. "Well, to be honest, I'm getting tired of all of this. Exhausted, actually," she honestly admitted, her face scowling into a grimace when she considered how her revelation sounded. _

_"Calliope. . ."_

_Callie's attention quickly snapped in Arizona's direction, her teeth worrying her bottom lip and her eyes twinkling with mirth. She couldn't remember the last time she'd heard her wife call her by her full name and, closing her eyes, she slightly shook her head in order to get her thoughts back on track and away from the joy and warmth she felt at the sound of her name falling so effortlessly from Arizona's tongue. _

_Clearing her throat and looking away from the counselor and her wife, Callie once again began to pace. "Compliments and apologies can help heal a bruised ego and a wounded heart, and Arizona. . ." she paused, her eyes settling on the increasingly baffled wife. "You've done all of that. You've been so amazing about telling me how you really feel, and I think you can agree that I've done the same." _

_Holding Arizona's gaze, Callie decided to continue when she saw her wife's nod of silent agreement. "I've apologized for betraying your trust when it came to your medical decisions, even though I really had no choice. I've expressed to you how hurt I was after the affair, how betrayed I felt, and we've struggled through what happened and what it all means. We've both made an honorable effort of working through all that stuff, all the hard questions of what happened and why. We've talked and talked. We've discussed until we're blue in the face, and I. . .I can't do that anymore. I just can't."_

_Unable to take it any longer, Arizona stood from her seat, making her way in Callie's direction. "Please, Calliope. Don't do this. We've tried so hard to fix our marriage, and I. . .I'll do whatever you need. I'll. . ."_

_"Move back in with me, Arizona. Come home with me and Sofia," Callie instantly demanded, shocking not only herself, but the other two women in the room, as well. _

_With her expressive brown eyes wide with shock, Callie nervously placed her hands on her hips before swinging her arms to the front of her to harshly squeeze her palms together. "Our relationship is stronger than it's ever been, Arizona, but I. . I need. . .action. I need physical reassurance. I need to fall asleep with you every night and wake up with you every morning. I need your presence, Arizona. More than just emotionally. More than just words. I need to see it, not just hear it. I need to see with my own eyes that all these things you're saying to me are true."_

* * *

Tying a way oversized gown around Sofia's body, Arizona took a seat on a wheeled stool, pulling the little girl onto her lap as her eyes perused her daughter's latest test results on the tablet in her hand.

"How much longer until my Olivia gets to come home?" Sofia asked, her small hand holding the even smaller one of her sister through the clear incubator wall.

Looking over her eldest daughter's raven hair toward her wife who stood on the opposite side of Olivia's bed, Arizona sighed, tugging Sofia closer to her chest. "Soon, baby," she simply replied, setting the electronic device to the side.

"But I want her to come home now, momma," Sofia argued. "I want to play with her and show her all of my toys and show her the pictures I painted for her in her room."

With a sigh, Callie removed her hand from the incubators hand hole before making her way around the clear plastic baby warmer to take a seat on a rolling stool in front of her wife and daughter. "Do you remember all the stories momma and I have told you about when you were born?" Callie asked, resting her palms on Sofia's knees.

"You mean how I was small, but strong?" Sofia innocently asked, glancing behind her to see Arizona nod.

Wrapping her arms more protectively around the little girl's body as she kissed her temple, Arizona then rested her chin atop her head as she and Sofia intently watched Callie continue to explain.

"Yeah, baby. You were really tiny, and that's why you had to stay in the hospital for such a long time," Callie clarified, reaching out to gently caress a cherubic cheek before winding silky black hair behind her ear. "And you had to have surgery to fix your heart, just like Olivia needs to have surgery to fix her head," she continued, glancing between both of her little girls before looking up toward her wife.

Sofia seemed to consider Callie's explanation and, twisting back and forth on Arizona's lap, she tipped her head to the side in question. "Are you and momma gonna fix my Olivia's head?" she asked, scooting from her mother's embrace to place her palms against the sides of her sister's bed. "'Cuz our moms are the bestest surgeons in the whole wide world, Olivia. They're superstars with scalpels."

Callie bit her bottom lip in an attempt to stifle the laughter she felt bubbling inside her upon hearing Sofia's statement and, reaching out, she took Arizona's hand into her own as she scooted closer to rest her head against her wife's shoulder.

Wrapping her arm around Callie's back, Arizona kissed the top of her head. "She's going to be an amazing big sister," she commented as she and Callie continued to listen to Sofia amicably chat with Olivia about how _awesome_ their mommies were at fixing femurs and clavicles and tiny human lungs and livers and spleens.

* * *

Stepping through the NICU doors, Lauren Boswell smiled at the nurse who handed her Olivia's medical record, her attention quickly drawn to the small group of people hovered around the particular baby she was there to see.

From across the room, she intently watched, an uncomfortable and malevolent smile curling at the sides of her mouth as she saw Arizona Robbins pull a raven haired girl into her lap, the blonde's head falling back with a hearty laugh when Callie Torres whispered something into her ear.

She found herself unable to look away from the admittedly striking family, the gorgeous blonde with a contagious dimpled grin, definitely the odd man out when it came to features. Though she was no less stunning, she didn't share the identical caramel skin and dark locks of the rest of the family, nor did she possess the large megawatt smiles lighting the faces of the elder two.

However, that didn't mean she wasn't breathtaking; the blonde was just as beautiful as Lauren remembered, and she found herself mesmerized by her infectious smile and the light in her beautiful blue eyes. In fact, Arizona aside, the vision of the entire family was intoxicating. They looked happy. They looked in love. They looked like everything an ideal family should be.

But. . .none of that really mattered. Lauren only wanted one part of this perfect little family, and when she saw something she wanted, nothing was going to stand in the way of her getting it.

* * *

_**(Flashback: Three Months Ago)**_

_Seated in the middle of the nursery floor of their new home, Callie apprehensively watched as Arizona climbed up onto a step ladder, paint roller in hand, on her way to slap the teal colored paint they'd chosen for their new baby girl's bedroom up on the walls._

_"Please be careful, Arizona," Callie beseeched, her head tipped to the side in concentration as she read through the assembly instructions for the dark wooden crib they'd finally decided upon. "I'm too fat to move quickly. I'll never make it in time to catch your cute little butt if you fall."_

_With a deliberate shimmy of her hips, Arizona turned from her work to gaze down upon her wife, her face lighting in a huge smile when she saw the confused look on Callie's face, brilliant white teeth gnawing on her bottom lip in intense contemplation. _

_At over six months pregnant, Callie was simply. . . glowing. Her generally perfect caramel skin seemed brighter, more radiant; her already fabulous head of hair appeared thicker and healthier from its position stacked messily atop her head. _

_And, oh God, her boobs. From Arizona's vantage point, she could see directly down Callie's tank top that she wore under an oversized pair of bib overalls, the sight of the valley between her blossoming breasts, causing Arizona's tongue to peek out to wet her now arid lips. _

_"What?" Callie asked after glancing up from the instructions to find her wife salaciously staring at her._

_With a blush rising in her cheeks upon being caught in her lusty gaze, Arizona smirked before turning back to throw some paint up on the wall. "Nothing," she quipped with a shrug of her shoulders. _

_Callie suspiciously continued to watch her wife work; that ass just did not quit and, struggling to make her way to her feet, she then stalked over to the woman she loved before grabbing a paint brush of her own. _

_Glancing down, Arizona opened her mouth to scold her wife for painting when she had specifically asked her not to, but her voice quickly caught in her throat when she followed the movement of Callie's hand, reading the words that appeared in teal paint across the bright white wall with each deliberate brush stroke._

_Will you marry me? _

_Glancing from her work, Callie expectantly searched Arizona's confused face, a playful gleam in her eye as her heart thundered loudly in her chest. She hadn't necessarily planned this, but in watching her wife take such care in making sure everything for their new baby girl was going to be just right, the idea of a proposal had hit her out of nowhere. Not that they weren't married already, because they were, in everyone's eyes but the law, but making it official, like really official, was something she'd been thinking more and more about every day. _

_And why not? They were in love. Their commitment to each other and their family was renewed. The trust they shared was armored, unbreakable, and as it had never been before._

_When Arizona still didn't answer, Callie realized her wife probably thought she was completely insane because she too had never viewed them as anything less than married for the past five years. So, with a brilliant smile consuming her entire face, Callie playfully bit her bottom lip as her eyes flicked from her bewildered wife to the white wall to continue writing her message with the paint brush._

_Again? _

_Still receiving no response, Callie sighed in exasperation, rolling her eyes as she kept going, searching her brain for a way to make her baffled wife understand. _

_Legally this time?_

_With realization finally setting in, Arizona opened her mouth to speak, but finding herself unable to make words, she covered her mouth in awe as she adamantly nodded her head._

_"Yeah?" Callie then spoke aloud._

_Unable to hold her excitement at bay any longer, Arizona moved down the ladder as she happily shrieked into the empty room before throwing her arms around her wife's neck. _

_An exuberant laugh left Callie's lips, excitedly holding onto her wife as they happily spun around, bouncing up and down. "I'll take that as a yes?" she asked once they had both found the sense to stop squealing._

_Arizona took the sides of Callie's face into her hands, first planting a kiss onto her forehead and then her nose before capturing plump lips with her own in a hard kiss. "Yes, Calliope. Yes. I'll marry you. Again. And legally. Any way you want."_

* * *

"I'll be right there, Sof," Arizona spoke into her cell phone as she stepped off the elevator on her way to join her daughter, Callie, and their parents for lunch in the cafeteria. "No, no, no. Tell abuelo and pop-pop I said no ice cream until _after_ you eat lunch," she spoke into the phone with a roll of her eyes. "Let me talk to Mami," she requested.

"Hey."

"No ice cream until _after_ lunch, Callie."

An intoxicating laugh met Arizona's ear. "I take it you found your phone?" came the teasing voice on the other end of the line.

"Clearly," she replied, making her way closer and closer to her destination. "I'll see you in a few."

With a smile on her face, Arizona tucked her phone into the back pocket of her jeans as she rounded the last corner before reaching the cafeteria.

"Arizona. Hey. I was hoping I'd see you down here."

Arizona's body instantly froze, her posture straight as an arrow as her stomach immediately began twist and contract at the sound of the sickeningly sweet voice she remembered all too well. Unsure of what else to do, she stuffed her hands into her jean pockets, plastering a smile on her face as she turned around.

"Dr. Boswell. Did you need to speak to me about Olivia?" she asked, nervously pulling her hands from her jeans to close herself off with her arms now crossed over her chest.

Lauren shook her head, a cagey smirk on her face as she took a step closer to Arizona. "No. Olivia is doing well."

"Good. That's good," Arizona replied with a tight nod and, unwilling to say or do anything more, she then took an identical step back away from the taller woman before turning on her heel to move the rest of the way toward the cafeteria and her family.

* * *

"Hey, Torres," Alex Karev spoke, catching up with Callie at the vending machine outside the cafeteria doors.

"You know, it's your fault Sofia will only drink juice from _this _vending machine, right?" she asked with a slight roll of her eyes as she fed several quarters into the coin slot. "She said _Dr. Alex_ told her this juice is the best because it's full of fairy dust that will make her grow." Callie shook her head at the thought of Alex Karev ever saying such a thing. "What the Hell happened to you?"

Alex shrugged with a crooked grin on his scruffy face. "You're freaking wife happened to me, that's what," he gruffly commented. "But, I came to talk to you about Olivia's surgery. Avery and I spoke with Shepherd and Boswell. We all agree we should schedule her surgery for first thing tomorrow morning. That gives Boswell a little more time to prepare," he informed, pulling a bag of ruffled potato chips from the bottom of the vending machine.

"Are you sure that's the best plan of action? What is she starts to seize again? What if. . ." Callie trailed off, her eyes flicking past Alex to land on Arizona and Lauren who appeared engaged in a tense conversation not twenty feet away. "Shit," she mumbled, grabbing Alex's arm to tug him further away from the two blonde surgeons before hunkering down behind him to observe her wife.

"What the Hell, Torres?" Alex grumbled in confusion before his own eyes landed on his boss and the woman he was aware she had slept with years before.

With her hands on either of Alex's arms, Callie peeked her head around him so she could look on undetected, her eyes narrowing as she watched the scene unfold before her.

* * *

With her arms folded over her chest, Arizona only made it a few steps from Lauren before she reached out, her thin hand landing on Arizona's shoulder to turn her back around.

"How have you been, Arizona?" Lauren asked before Arizona had the chance to get away. "I see that you and Dr. Torres are still together, so I thought it would be best for me to speak with you alone. I. . .umm, I've thought about you on several occasions over the past two years, and I. . ."

"You were asked back to this hospital strictly for business reasons, Dr. Boswell. You're only here because you are the best, and _my_ daughter deserves the best. Nothing less. Nothing more," Arizona insisted, shrugging her arm out of the taller woman's grasp. "Let's not make this anymore awkward than it already is."

* * *

"That tramp better get her hand off of her, Alex," Callie whispered from where she stood using him as a shield so she could continue watching from afar. "She's got three seconds. Three, two. . ."

Before Callie could count down to one, she saw Arizona remove herself from the hold Lauren had on her. "That's right, bitch," she triumphantly spoke, but her eyes grew wide when she once again witnessed the other woman move closer to her wife.

* * *

"Come on, Arizona. You can't tell me you haven't thought about me over the past couple years," Lauren insisted, stepping closer to Arizona to now completely invade her personal space.

Arizona swallowed hard, adamantly shaking her head. "You're right, Dr. Boswell. I did think about you. Almost every day for the first six months after I met you."

Feeling strangely victorious, Lauren closed the remaining distance between herself and the object of her affection before reaching out to tuck a strand of blonde hair behind her one time lover's ear.

* * *

"That's it! I'm gonna kill her," Callie angrily spat, quickly straightening up and stepping around the male surgeon to stalk toward her wife and the harlot currently touching her.

But, before she could escape, Alex grabbed her arm, pulling her back. "Torres!" he challenged in a whispered yell. "Just wait."

* * *

Feeling the slender, almost skeletal, and freezing cold hand gently brush against her face, Arizona instantly bristled at the unfamiliar sensation, her eyes narrowing in disgust. "And when I _did_ think of you, all I ever felt was anger a-a-and sadness and regret. So, don't touch me! Don't _ever_ touch me!" she angrily spat, her own hand grasping Lauren's to force it away.

"Arizona. . ."

But before Lauren could speak any further, the other woman had turned around and was gone.

* * *

_**(Arizona's POV)**_

_Last night I told Callie that when I saw Dr. Boswell for the first time again in the NICU, that I felt. . .nothing. Nothing but disgust in myself for allowing her to get to me back then, but now, I find myself. . .shaken. Not by her presence, but by her actions and her words. _

_How could she be so brazen? How could she be so callous to knowingly try to get me to jump back into bed with her when it's obvious that I'm not the person I was back then. I've come so far. Callie and I both have. We are thankfully still married with two beautiful little girls and are happier and stronger than we've ever been, but I guess Dr. Boswell wouldn't be able to find that bit of information in an online Google search. _

_This woman has to be crazy to think I would ever be tempted by her in the same way I was before. She is here for one reason and one reason alone, and that's my sweet baby, Olivia. If we hadn't needed her to perform this surgery, her name never would have entered my mind. We wouldn't be here in the hospital. We would be home with our girls, enjoying and hating early morning feedings, dirty diapers, and sleepless nights while creating a bond with Olivia and Sofia that no one will ever be able to break. _

_I'm at such a loss right now. I'm angry. I'm hurt, and all I want to do is see my family, to hug my daughter and kiss my wife. _

_Is it the thrill of the hunt? Does sleeping with married women do something to boost her self-esteem? I have no idea, but what I do know is Dr. Lauren Boswell was never part of my reality, but instead, she was an. . .illusion. An illusion that came crashing down around me the moment I saw the harrowing look in Callie's eyes the night she found my wedding ring pinned to another woman's scrub top. _

_I could go on and on about how overwhelming my feelings were at the time of my affair and how I couldn't help myself for succumbing to them, but I'd be deceiving myself by doing so. I made a mistake. I was selfish, egotistical, and flattered by another woman's interest in me, the way she listened to me, and appeared to admire me and, at a time when I felt I had lost my wife's attention, that we had grown apart in ways I couldn't even begin to comprehend, I faltered. I cheated. I betrayed my wife. _

_While I could try to justify it, I know that if I didn't want to risk destroying my marriage, I would have walked away from the temptation the very moment I realized I was falling for Dr. Boswell but, I didn't do that, and I will be sorry for that for the rest of my life. _

_The moment I cheated, I knew it was wrong, that this just wasn't me and, for a long time, I wasn't sure if Callie would ever be able to forgive me for what I had done. And why should she? This was the ultimate betrayal, the ultimate defeat, but. . .I was determined to make it up to her. I had to, because no matter the losses I had suffered, the loss of Calliope, the love of my life, was worse than anything I had ever endured before. It's sad to say, but it took losing her for me to realize just how important she was to my life and how terrified I was of being without, not just her, but Sofia, as well. _

_And so, I had to fix it. I didn't want my family to split up or for my little girl to have to experience the distress of her parents divorcing. I was very aware of the terrible hurt I had caused to those I loved most in the world. I regretted my actions with all my heart, and for a long time I was afraid it was too late for me to repair the damage._

_But, I wasn't a serial philanderer. I may have behaved selfishly and made the conscious decision to do so, but Callie was somehow able to see past that. She was able to internalize and rationalize the pain I was experiencing from all the losses I had suffered. _

_Even though Callie may not have known exactly what it was like to have to embrace and look beyond a disability - my disability - the one thing she was able to do was. . .forgive. To see that I made a mistake. One mistake. To realize I hadn't been unfaithful to her before and, the fact that she was willing to give me and our marriage a second chance, meant the world to me. _

_And now, even though I am faced with the woman I was tempted by in the past, I will not falter. I will not waver. I will not be enticed or seduced. I will never betray my wife ever again. _

* * *

Stepping through the cafeteria door, Arizona scanned the crowded room for her family and, spotting Sofia seated upon Lucia's lap, she smiled in relief before crossing the distance separating herself from the most important people in her life.

"Hey, you," Callie greeted, stepping up behind her wife with a plastic bottle of apple juice in her hand.

Shocked by the sound of her wife's voice, Arizona quickly spun around, her azure eyes initially diverting Callie's gaze before gathering the resolve to look directly into the depths of the magical brown pools she found herself drowning in over and over again.

Refusing to break their gaze, Callie set the juice aside as she continued to stare back at her wife and, with a slight nod of understanding, she watched as Arizona's face lit with recognition.

Tipping her head to the side, the blonde studied Callie's face and without a word spoken between them, she suddenly knew that somehow. . .Callie knew. "Calliope, I. . ."

Callie only shook her head, reaching out to tuck a wayward curl behind her wife's ear.

Arizona's eyes instantly fell shut at the reverent touch and, with two shaking hands, she grabbed Callie's, forcing her palms to remain exactly where they were against the sides of her face. Reveling in the sensation of Callie's warm, soft fingers lovingly resting against her skin - a stark contrast to the boney icebergs that were there only minutes before - Arizona breathed in through her nose in an attempt to calm her battered emotions, never wanting this feeling of intimacy, of familiarity, of complete fulfillment to ever end.

Slowly opening her eyes, several tears dripped down Arizona's ivory cheeks only to be replaced by loving kisses against each one. "I love you, Calliope. More than anything."

Callie smiled slightly, her own eyes brimming with tears. "I love you, too."


	8. Chapter 8

**Title**: Clarity

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: M/NC-17

**Summary**: Three years after the plane crash, Callie and Arizona have reconciled their differences and are now the happiest they've even been. With their relationship now stronger than ever, will the necessary presence of a face from the past tear them apart? Will their marriage stand up to life's latest tragedy or will they find that they are in the exact same position they were years before?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Eight**_

* * *

Glancing out the rain blurred NICU window, Arizona shivered as she watched the wall of water hammer against the glass, the sudden Seattle shower spreading the chilly haze of rain into early November. She felt miserable, and this weather was doing little to help her mood.

Slowly stepping closer to the incubator housing her youngest daughter, she heavily sighed as she read through the latest test results on the tablet in her hand. Taking a seat on the stool situated next to her wife, she blew out another breath before she spoke. "No apnea through the night. Oxygen saturation ranged from ninety-two to ninety-eight on two liters of O2. Heart rate is one thirty-five. BP 64/41. . ."

Callie's focus quickly snapped from where it lay mesmerized by the tiny infant to land on her wife when she heard Arizona's voice crack in the middle of rattling off their daughter's vital signs. "You okay?" she softly asked, already certain of what the truthful answer to that question would be.

Arizona didn't speak, only hanging her head as she tried to fend off the tears she's been desperately attempting to hold at bay.

"Arizona. . ."

When the blonde finally forced herself to look up, Callie's heart ached at the fear and anxiety, dilemma and uncertainty she saw painted across Arizona's every feature and, watching as a lone tear blinked from a melancholy eye to trickle down her generally stoic wife's alabaster cheek, she reached out a shaking hand to wipe the moisture from her face. "She's going to be fine, Arizona," Callie gently spoke, her words doing little to calm the distress and worry she too was feeling. "We have the best of the best surgeons on our side, sweetie, and they're not going to let anything happen to our little girl."

Arizona only nodded once before allowing her head to fall forward to rest against Callie's shoulder. "She's going to be okay. She has to be," she whispered against the mesh of Callie's protective gown.

Two strong arms then wrapped around Arizona's body, a caramel cheek coming to rest atop a blonde head. Arizona had attempted to be the strong one during all of this - since Olivia's birth - and the fact that she had chosen this very moment to fall apart, scared Callie to death.

Bringing one hand up to gently stroke Arizona's hair, Callie kissed her wife's cheek when she slowly pulled back, wiping at her eyes and sniffling through her tears. "Do you want to pray with me?" Callie softly murmured, smiling slightly when Arizona gave her a tight nod.

Reaching through the hand hole of the incubator, Callie took Olivia's tiny hand into her own, her other lacing together with Arizona's who pushed her own free hand into the incubator to rest against the baby's leg.

"Our Father, who art in heaven. . ." Callie began, her left hand tightly grasping Arizona's as if it was a life raft keeping her afloat upon a tumultuous sea.

"Hallowed be Thy Name. . ." Arizona joined in a hushed whisper, her head solemnly bowed and her eyes closed. "Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. . ."

As the two mothers continued to pray, their hands joining with each other and their brand new baby girl, the NICU went quiet, save for the beeping of machines that kept other tiny humans alive, the storm still raging outside with rain hammering down against the window panes.

". . .and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen."

Callie and Arizona both slowly opened their eyes, surprised to see that Alex Karev had approached during their prayer, his own head hanging reverently as he respectfully allowed them the time they needed.

"We're ready to take her now," he quietly informed after several moments of silence.

Arizona nodded her head, reluctantly pulling her arm from within the incubator, though her other hand never left its humble refuge secured within that of her wife.

Derek Shepherd and Lauren Boswell then appeared behind Alex, both surgeons exuding confidence in the job they were about to do. "We'll take care of her. I promise," Derek supplied, a half smile tugging at his lips.

Callie was the last to remove her hand from where it grasped at Olivia's tiny fingers, a large tear escaping her expressive chocolate brown eyes as she and Arizona both stood in unison.

This was all just so surreal. Time seemed to slow, the institutional walls of the hospital, blurring to an eerie gray and, walking next to the incubator as Alex took the lead in wheeling it from Pre-Op toward the OR doors, Callie couldn't help but witness the way Dr. Lauren Boswell watched her wife.

The taller blonde's eyes never ceased in leering at Arizona like she was a possession - something she had to have, something she needed to call her own and, pausing at the invisible line of the OR door, Callie halted, wanting to continue, but knowing she could not. Apparently though, Arizona felt no compulsion whatsoever to stop, following Alex into the OR where Callie watched through the doors as he scolded his boss, asking her to leave.

"Crazy storms you have in Seattle."

Callie's dream like state quickly morphed to attention, her heart plummeting into her stomach at the sight and sound of the woman standing next to her. "What was that, Dr. Boswell?" she asked, her teeth clenching in disdain.

Lauren sneered at Callie with a sly smirk. "Oh, nothing. I just. . .I wanted to make sure you realize that. . .the fact that you now have _another_ baby won't stop me, or your wife, for that matter from losing control in the middle of a storm."

Callie's mouth fell agape at the comment, her brain working overtime to decipher what exactly the blonde was suggesting. "Excuse me?" she indignantly questioned, a look of shock cementing on her face.

Lauren opened her mouth to respond, but was cut off by a sullen Arizona who reluctantly made her way back through the double doors. "Alex kicked me out," she pouted, her attention focused solely on the brunette in front of her with little regard for the blonde who now stood at her back.

Callie momentarily glanced over Arizona's shoulder but, not wanting to cause any drama in the OR, she looked back toward her wife as Lauren quickly made her escape, disappearing through the swinging doors.

Taking Callie's hand into her own, Arizona moved to lead them toward the surgical waiting room where she knew both sets of their parents would be, but when Callie didn't move, she paused, turning back around. "You okay?" she asked, her brow furrowing when she spotted the indiscernible look on her wife's face.

Callie blinked twice, shaking herself from her silent and increasingly irate reverie. "I, umm. . .yeah. I'm fine," she lied with a fabricated smile before leaning forward to peck at Arizona's lips. "You go ahead. I'm just going to stop by the restroom."

* * *

_**(Callie's POV)**_

_Few things are more devastating than finding out your wife has cheated on you and, while most women would undoubtedly go ballistic on her, others may focus their anger on the other woman involved. _

_After the affair, I agonized over confronting Dr. Boswell about her actions and, as time went on, I found myself waiting - from time to time - to come up with the perfect withering remark to deliver to her along with. . .a bone saw directly to her brain._

_At the time, I immediately felt that I needed to speak to her, to try to understand but, after a while, I was finally able to convince myself that my actions would all be for naught. _

_So, I eventually reached the place where I never wanted to see her ever again; I didn't need to confront her or to stake my claim on Arizona, but what I did need was to get away from her and, once Dr. Boswell was gone from the hospital, I was able to remove myself from not only her, but from Arizona, as well. I needed time to distance myself, time to stop giving either of them my precious mental energy._

_Throughout the six months that Arizona and I were separated after Dr. Boswell came into our lives, and even fleetingly in the time we have been back together, I've considered what it would be like to once again come face to face with the woman who nearly ruined my life, and all I've been able to come up with is. . .it would be completely futile for me to speak with her, because women like Lauren Boswell have no shame, they feel no responsibility for their actions, and honestly may even be a little crazy._

_It's been difficult for me to isolate who was at fault in this situation and, while Arizona and I decided long ago that there were no faults where either of us were concerned; she felt that I'd become more of her caregiver than her wife, not listening to her wants and to her needs, while she got caught up in what she felt was right, behaving impulsively in order to reclaim herself and come to terms with her new life. _

_I get that, all of that, I really do, but I've been wholly unable to offer Lauren the same courtesy. She knew Arizona was married. She knew what she was doing, but she still pursued her and, even though I wanted to scream and yell at that trollop of a woman, I finally realized that by speaking with her, I would only be supporting one of the various rationales about me that I'm sure she'd devised in her conniving blonde head. That I was crazy. That I was nuts. That I wasn't good enough for Arizona, or that I wasn't worthy of her love. Had I confronted her, she would have delighted in that superiority over me, the poor pathetic chump who was begging for her marriage. _

_So, I swallowed my pride. I turned all my energy and all my attention toward someone I knew would be more receptive of it. I focused on working on myself and with Arizona to fix what we had broken, and. . .we succeeded. We came out stronger and better for it, but now, two years later, I'm faced with this woman again, a woman who is clearly still interested in my wife. _

_And. . .that makes me angry. I'm furious. I'm hurt. I'm pissed. She can clearly see that we are together, that we are in love, that we are a family who refuses to be torn asunder. Arizona and I have worked too hard and come too far to allow this woman to infiltrate our marriage and, the fact that Lauren Boswell assumes my wife will just succumb to her will, that Arizona will just throw everything away to submit to her every tawdry desire, is absolutely infuriating. _

_My mind is reeling. I can't think. I can't speak, but one thing I am unquestionably certain of is. . .Lauren Boswell has no heart. She has no soul, and even though I'm sure I will be boosting her precious little ego by confronting her, I'm completely unsure if I'll be able to stop myself from doing just that._

* * *

Standing outside the scrub room door, Callie fought with herself, mentally berating herself for what she was about to do but, before she could stop her legs from putting one foot in front of the other, she found herself pushing through the swinging door and coming to a halt in the middle of the scrub room floor.

"Has _the wife_ finally come to fight for what's hers?" Lauren remarked without turning around, her attention trained solely on the surgical scrub brush lathering her left hand.

"Arizona's not a possession, Dr. Boswell. She belongs to no one," Callie was quick to contest, her tone strong and unwavering. "But she is _my_ wife and will be until the day I die. You, on the other hand, were nothing more than a twenty minute mistake."

"Is there a point to all of this, Dr. Torres?" Lauren quickly asked, looking over her shoulder as she ran her hands under the spray of water streaming from the faucet. "I'm pretty busy right now."

Callie shifted her weight from side to side and, clearing her throat, she carefully chose her words. "I fought with myself about saying something to you. I mean, I'd have to be crazy, right? To speak with you right now right before my daughter's surgery? Right before you cut into my baby's skull. . ." she trailed off, her blazing eyes boring a hole directly into the back of Lauren's head. "But, this is my family, Dr. Boswell, and I've worked too hard for this family to lose it," she honestly continued without missing a beat.

Turning from the sink, Lauren held up her arms in front of her, careful not to contaminate her freshly scrubbed hands. "I assure you I'm the best of the best, Dr. Torres. I'm not going to let anything happen to your baby."

Callie found herself surprised by the other woman's candor and, stepping back, she defiantly crossed her arms over her chest. "I think we both know I'm not just talking about Olivia," she remarked, intense brown eyes penetrating Lauren's hazel green.

Receiving the response she was sure she would, a haughty smirk from the blonde wearing a mint green and yellow scrub cap, Callie cleared her throat, needing to get her point across without allowing her emotions to prevail. "You were asked here to assist with a life-saving surgery for my daughter. You were not asked here for any other reason, and certainly not for my wife," she insisted, stepping forward and into Lauren's personal space.

"I'm well aware of _what_ I was brought back here _for_, but I'm also aware of _whom_ I was brought back here _by_," Lauren insolently replied. "If Arizona only needed a surgeon to operate on her daughter, she could have called anyone in the world, but instead, she chose me."

Callie shook her head. "You see, that's where you're wrong. Arizona gave _me_ the option to choose which surgeon would perform Olivia's surgery. _I_ was the one who brought you back here, Dr. Boswell, because while your capacity as a human being is questionable, you _are_ the best craniofacial specialist in the entire United States," she admitted through gritted teeth. "You're the best, and our daughter deserves the best. So, I chose you, because I trust my wife, and because that baby in there is one of the things that lights up Arizona's world. She and our older daughter are what make Arizona smile, and losing either of them would absolutely kill her. So, _I_ asked you back. To fix our daughter, because without Olivia, Arizona would be absolutely incomplete. She would be devastated. Our kids are what make my wife whole. Not you, Dr. Boswell. You can't and _will never_ do that for her, no matter what you believe."

Lauren opened her mouth to argue, but Callie pushed through.

"You are here to fix our baby. The baby Arizona and I made together. The baby Arizona and I hoped and prayed for. The baby who has already filled our family with so much joy," Callie insisted, her posture set and her shoulders rigid. "So, don't even think about fucking with my family, Dr. Boswell. Not again. Not this time, because if you do, you'll be doing so over my dead body," she wholeheartedly warned.

"Really?" Lauren sarcastically retorted, forgetting about her scrubbed hands and defiantly crossing them over her chest to meet the brunette's stance.

"Really," Callie contended without a second thought. "So, I'm going to go now, and _you_ are going to re-scrub your filthy hands so you can perform the surgery that will save Olivia's life, and if you can't do that. . .if you can't separate what I've just said to you here from the well-being of your patient, if you are going into this surgery with delusions of getting my wife to fall back into bed with you, then I'm going to have to ask you to leave. Right now. Because we can find another surgeon, Dr. Boswell, but we'll never be able to replace that little girl. We'll never be able to replace what puts the bounce in _my_ wife's step and the twinkle in her eyes," she continued, a lump of emotion forming in her throat at the thought of the loss of her precious newborn baby. "Do we have an understanding?"

* * *

**(**_**Flashback: One Year Ago)**_

_"College degree, has an eclectic taste in music, blonde hair, blue eyes," Callie insisted, stepping out of the ensuite bathroom of their home and into the bedroom. "Those are my only stipulations," she continued, removing her robe and slipping under the covers of the bed where Arizona sat against the headboard, a large binder and several laminated pieces of paper strewn atop the duvet. _

_"You don't ask for much," Arizona teased, nudging her wife with her elbow as she read over the information page for the sperm donor she held in her hand. "This one's an engineer, loves rock climbing. . ."_

_"Nope," Callie interrupted, craning her neck to read the paper right along with her wife. "He has brown hair and green eyes. Toss it to the side."_

_Arizona rolled her eyes, exhaling loudly through pursed lips. "You are ridiculous with this. Why does it matter what color his hair and eyes are as long as he's smart and healthy and has good genes?"_

_Callie didn't immediately respond but, reaching out, she removed the paper from Arizona's grasp before taking two ivory hands into her own. "I'm so happy we're doing this together this time, sweetie, and I. . .I want so much for you to be a part of it, every step of the way. From the very beginning to the very end," she earnestly spoke, a smile covering her face. "And I know it may seem silly, but I guess in my mind, if we pick a guy who looks like you, well. . .it just makes it seem more a part of you if there's the slightest chance that our baby could have some of your features."_

_Arizona tipped her head to the side, considering the honesty in Callie's words. "Sofia isn't technically mine either, Calliope, but I've never loved her any less. You know that," she softly replied._

_Callie nodded in agreement. "I do," she replied, reaching up to tuck a strand of blonde hair behind Arizona's ear. "I know that, Arizona. Sofia has always been your girl, and you have always been her momma. No questions asked, but this time, I want to do it right. I want to make a baby that is as much a part of me as it is you, and I. . .I may be crazy, but. . ." Callie trailed off, frustrated by her inability to explain. "I'm sorry. This all made a lot more sense in my head."_

_Arizona smiled, leaning forward to press her lips to Callie's in a gentle kiss before pulling back and mischievously winking at the flustered brunette. "It's okay. I get it," she replied, her heart swelling with the boundless love and immeasurable admiration she felt at just how much thought and consideration Callie had put into this. "So, blonde hair and blue eyes, huh?"_

_Callie chuckled softly, slipping under the covers and pulling Arizona down with her. Resting her head on Arizona's bare shoulder as they continued to flip through the book of sperm donors she held in her hands, Callie once again spoke. "Oh, and if it's possible, I'd REALLY like him to have dimples, too."_

* * *

Standing in the ambulance bay, Callie looked up into the unnatural darkness of the morning sky, torrential sheets of water pouring out of dark clouds to land in streams over the pavement, completing their journey as they gurgled down the various storm drains surrounding the hospital.

She just needed a moment alone; she needed to gather her thoughts and calm her raging nerves. Arizona was already apprehensive and stressed enough for the both of them, and she knew without a doubt that if she went marching right into the waiting room without taking the time to compose herself, her wife would be able to tell that something was up, and neither of them really needed anything more to deal with at this point in time.

Breathing deeply, the cool autumn air burned at Callie's lungs before she exhaled it in a shuddering burst of air and, tightly tugging her coat around her body, she fumbled with the closure to zip it up. She just needed a couple more minutes to slow her racing heart and assuage the random thoughts that relentlessly bounced about in her head.

"Everything alright, mija?"

Callie immediately turned to her left, noticing her father for the first time since she had escaped the confines of the hospital for some fresh air. Watching as he pressed the touchscreen of his phone before slipping it into the front of his sport coat, Callie smiled slightly as he made his way in her direction. "Yeah, daddy. I'm good," she maligned, melting into her father's embrace when he wrapped her up in a supportive hug.

"Don't lie to me, Calliope," Carlos stated, kissing her cheek and then pulling away. "You know I can tell when you're lying."

With a heavy sigh, Callie shook her head, moving the few steps to sit on a bench beneath the awning of the ambulance bay and, leaning forward with her elbows resting on her knees, she cradled her own face in her hands as Carlos rubbed her back from his position now seated next to her.

Finally straightening up, Callie leaned into her father who kept his arm securely wrapped around her shoulders. "Dr. Boswell - the surgeon operating on Olivia - well, she's the woman Arizona had an affair with after the crash," she simply replied, unsure of how her often volatile father would react to the news.

She had no intention of ever telling her father of Arizona's infidelity two years prior, but when Sofia had rambled on to him about how she loved her _new home with momma in the hotel_ during not just one, but two of their Sunday evening phone calls, Carlos had forced Callie to explain. She had reluctantly done so, crying as she did, while also swearing her father to secrecy where everyone else, including her mother, was concerned.

Carlos remained silent for several long moments, and fearing his reaction, Callie found herself anxiously shying away from the ominous presence at her side but, before she could escape the bench, he turned to face her. "But you and Arizona are doing well. Correct?" he asked, his gruff voice full of concern for the state of his daughter's marriage.

Callie furrowed her brow at his response, though she nodded her head in agreement. "Yeah, daddy. Arizona and I have honestly never been better. Our marriage is stronger than ever. We're good, daddy. _So_ good," she replied, her face lifting slightly at the thought of the renewed commitment she and Arizona now shared.

"Okay," Carlos simply stated, though he appeared confused. "I don't understand, then. What's the issue?"

Callie sighed, slowly standing from her seat. "The issue is that Arizona left it up to me to decide if we asked Dr. Boswell to come here or not, and I said yes. I placed my family in this situation because she's the best of the best, daddy, and Olivia deserves the best. . ."

"Of course my grandbaby deserves that best, mija," Carlos interrupted as he stood, crossing the pavement to stand toe to toe with his daughter. "But what does that have to do with Arizona _or _this Dr. Boswell and whatever happened between them?"

"She's still wants Arizona, daddy. That woman is evil and manipulative and will stop at nothing until she gets what she wants," Callie quickly replied.

Carlos reached forward, his hands coming to rest at the sides of both of Callie's arms. "But is that was Arizona wants?" he asked, reaching up to brush at a tear that escaped one of his daughter's dark brown eyes. "Because it seems to me that Arizona has no interest in _anyone_ or _anything_ but you and the beautiful family you've created. When I left the waiting room, she was about to wear a hole in the rug with the amount of pacing she was doing. That doesn't seem to me like a person who doesn't love her wife and her children."

Callie blew a breath out her nose, a slight chuckle spilling from her lips. "You're right, daddy. I'm just. . .I'm so. . .ugh," she groaned unintelligibly. "This is all just making me a little crazy. Olivia. Dr. Boswell. And. . ."

Carlos nodded his head in understanding. "You are strong, Calliope, and you are brave. You and Arizona have survived so much worse than this. It takes special people and a special kind of marriage to overcome the things you have, and I'm proud of you, mija. So proud," he admitted, once again pulling Callie into his arms.

Callie closed her eyes, seeking refuge that only a fatherly touch could provide. "Thank you for being here, daddy. When Arizona and I thought of having another baby, we certainly never ever envisioned _this_."

* * *

_"No, daddy. It was perfect. Sofia loved her Doc McStuffins Check-up Center," Callie spoke with a smile as she fumbled with the contents in her hands to get the key into the lock of her front door. "Yeah. I just got home. I will, daddy. I promise. Love you, too."_

_Sliding her thumb across the touchscreen to end the uncommon Thursday evening call, Callie dropped her phone into her bag before finally succeeding at unlocking the door. "Hey! I'm home," she called into the foyer of the house._

_"In the kitchen!" Arizona returned._

_Removing her jacket, Callie hung it on the rack near the door, dropping her purse and work bag to the floor below and, with a white pharmaceutical bag held tightly in her hand, she toed off her ballet flats before making her way through the house in search of her wife._

_"Hey!" Arizona greeted from behind the kitchen island where she stood tossing an antipasta salad in a large wooden bowl. "Where's Sofia?" she asked in confusion when she saw Callie appear through the swinging door alone and with an unfamiliar white paper bag in hand._

_Callie sheepishly regarded her wife, a seductive smile tugging at the corners of her lips as she rounded the counter to stand directly in front of her and, pressing Arizona back against the granite countertop, she leaned in to capture intoxicating pink lips in an insistent kiss. _

_Arizona responded in kind, her arms wrapping around her wife's curves to push her hands into the back pockets of Callie's jeans as she sucked a plump bottom lip into her mouth. "Mmm," she hummed when the brunette pulled back just enough to allow her room to breathe. "What was that for?"_

_Callie nuzzled her nose against an ivory one before pulling back, a brilliant megawatt smile lighting her face. "Sofia's at the McDreamy's," she replied, kissing Arizona's cheek bone, then moving downward to lay a whisper of a kiss against her jaw before nipping at her earlobe. "And, I'm ovulating."_

* * *

_Completely undressed and lying next to her equally naked wife, Arizona moved toward Callie, brushing her mouth against the devastatingly soft lips of her wife and, with a guttural moan into the blonde's mouth, Callie sank into the kiss, helplessly deepening the passionate and overwhelming joining of their lips._

_Eventually Arizona pulled away, breathless and wanting before crawling on top of her wife, laying reverent kisses over every inch of her exposed caramel skin. Moving from one heavy breast to the other, she stopped to look up into darkening chocolate eyes. "You're beautiful."_

_A blush rose over Callie's chest, neck, and cheeks as Arizona cupped the pliable flesh of her perfectly rounded breasts. With lusty cerulean eyes boring into the depths of the brunette's soul, Arizona painstakingly ran her thumbs over two turgid peaks and, with a smirk on her face, she then leaned forward to take one nipple between her teeth._

_Callie gasped aloud at the erotic sensation, her body arching into Arizona's mouth as her hands grasped at the duvet bunched beneath her palms. "Oh, God," she groaned as her wife continued to lavish her breasts with attention, kissing them all over as she gently twisted and pulled at both aching buds._

_With one nipple still in her mouth, Arizona then ran a hand over the gentle swell of Callie's abdomen before stopping to cup her mound. Continuing downward, she drew lazy circles with her fingertips up and down the brunette's slit before dragging her index finger over her clit. _

_An unintelligible sound emanated from deep within Callie's throat before she sharply gasped, her eyes rolling into the back of her head. _

_"I take it you like that?" Arizona playfully asked, leaning up on her left elbow to gaze down at her beautiful wife. _

_Callie's eyes slowly opened, a reproachful smirk on her face. "You already know I do," she replied, a jolt of electricity coursing through her body when Arizona continued to explore her wet folds. _

_With a provocative laugh, Arizona leaned in, lovingly kissing her wife and, removing her hand from Callie's center, she ran her palms all the way up Callie's arms then back down her body in a firm, but gentle exploration. "I need you to talk to me, Calliope. I need you to tell me when you're about to come. I want to get this just right."_

_Callie nodded in understanding, her bottom lip held firmly between brilliant white teeth. She and Arizona had made love and had sex more times that she could even remember but, tonight, something was different. Her wife had always been an attentive lover; Arizona knew what Callie liked and what she craved, what could bring her to the highest point of ecstasy in mere seconds but, right now, Callie felt more adored, more worshiped, and more treasured than ever before. She could feel just how intensely Arizona cared for her as she ran her hands over her body, a look of wonder on the blonde's face and in her wanton azure eyes as she explored every last inch of Callie's skin. _

_Dragging her attention from her wife's mesmerizing face, Arizona grabbed a pillow from the side of the bed before tucking it under Callie's hips and, desperate to touch her, she kissed down her neck, running her tongue over her collarbone as her hand returned to her molten core. She once again explored slippery folds, gliding an insistent finger over a pulsing bundle of nerves, stroking and rubbing, using gentle pressure exactly the way she knew her wife craved._

_With her attention focused solely on Callie's face, on her every move, and on every desperate sound she made to gauge her level of arousal, Arizona ran her tongue up her neck to her ear, breathing gently. "You're close. Already. I can tell."_

_"Uh huh. Don't stop."_

_"Not a problem," Arizona coyly replied and, with her eyes lovingly gazing down into magical dark brown, the blonde's demeanor quickly changed, her heart swelling with the enormity of what she was about to do. "I love you, Calliope. So much."_

_Lost in the haze of pleasure that generated from her throbbing center, radiating through her extremities, Callie swallowed hard, desperately trying to control the incredible climax she knew was only moments away from consuming her entire body in a blinding, pulsing moment of release. "Mmm. Wait!" she gasped, grabbing at Arizona's wrist and reluctantly tugging her hand away. "Oh, God. Arizona. Now. . ."_

_Grabbing the syringe she had already expertly drawn from where it rested on the night stand, Arizona carefully inserted it into Callie's pulsating opening before using her other hand to continue stimulating her wife's needy bud. _

_Callie's sounds grew more frantic, her breathing ragged, and Arizona increased her pace, desperate for her wife to come. "Oh, God. Arizona. I'm. . ." Arizona slowly and deliberately pressed the plunger with her thumb as Callie cried out in unabashed abandon, her entire body tensing and then shuddering as her hips bucked uncontrollably._

_Once her job was complete, Arizona gently removed the now empty syringe, continuing to slowly circle Callie's overly sensitive clitoris as her wife's body writhed against her hand. Finally slowing her ministrations until they came to a stop, she then pulled Callie toward her, nuzzling her nose into her neck. "God, that was amazing," she husked into her wife's ear as the brunette's breathing finally returned to normal. _

_Callie chuckled softly, her body completely limp with the orgasm that had just raged through her form but, turning around, she repositioned her thoroughly sated body so that her heels rested against the headboard, her hips elevated._

_Arizona lay the opposite way, her head next to her wife's. "Not bad for our first try, huh?"_

_A hearty laugh fell from Callie's mouth as she turned her head so she could look at her wife and, staring into delighted blue eyes, she leaned in to peck at moist pink lips. "Babe, if that right there doesn't make a baby, I'm not sure what will."_

* * *

Callie and Arizona sat side by side on a sofa isolated in a far corner of the surgical waiting area, one ivory hand amorously clasped together with a caramel one, fingers intertwined. It seemed like they had been sitting in that room forever, when in reality, Callie had only left the tumult of the rain and storm to join her family inside just thirty minutes prior.

"I can't take this anymore," Arizona stated as she quickly popped up from her seat.

Callie briskly stood along with her wife, her eyes wide with surprise at just how fast Arizona had gone from quiet contemplation to a manic whispered yell.

"It's been an hour, Callie. If they were going to use the endoscopic approach as opposed to the cranial vaulting like they said they were, then they should be finished by now. That was the whole point of bringing Boswell here in the first place. Remember? The _latest and greatest technique_!" Arizona continued, her hands flamboyantly waving through the air to illustrate her point.

Stepping closer to her flailing wife, Callie took her now trembling hands into her own. "It's only been fifty minutes, Arizona. You know as well as I do that in surgery, each and every minute counts. They had to get her prepped and then the anesthesia. These things take time," she explained, hoping to strike a chord with the rational surgeon she knew resided inside Arizona's head as opposed to the nearly frantic mother.

Arizona shook her head, though her hands continued to firmly grasped those of her wife. "What if something's wrong? What if they had to do the open procedure, or-or. . .I should be in there, Callie," she stammered, her voice thick with emotion. "This is _my_ job. This is what _I_ do. I fix tiny humans, and what the Hell good am I if I can't be there to fix my own?"

Callie tipped her head to the side, her heart aching at the responsibility Arizona was willing to bear and, with a gentle hand, she lightly caressed her wife's cheek before pulling her into a loving embrace. "Olivia's going to be fine, Arizona. She has to be," she stated into her wife's ear, her own words sounding hoarse with uncertainty and despair.

Arizona closed her eyes, reveling in the connection she and Callie shared, losing herself in the firm, but benevolent cocoon of her wife's ardent embrace.

"She's going to be fine," Callie repeated several times. "Our baby is going to be okay."

Pulling back after several long moments, Arizona wiped at the moisture that had gathered on her face as she moved her head in a nearly imperceptible nod. "I, umm. . .I think I'll go get everyone some coffee," she stated, leaning up on her toes to press a gentle kiss to Callie's lips.

"Do you want me to come with you?" Callie asked, unsure if she should leave her wife alone.

Arizona shook her head. "No, I just need a minute. If you don't mind, I'd like to go alone."

Callie tried her best not to appear hurt at Arizona's denial; she knew all too well how her wife chose to process and, plastering on her best smile, she gently nodded her head. "Sure. Go. I'll text you if I hear anything."

* * *

Arizona knew she shouldn't be doing this but, after leaving the waiting room, her feet seemed to move on their own volition, guiding her down the hall and directly into the scrub room of OR2. Throwing on a gown and mask before securing a disposable scrub cap atop her head, she then confidently entered the OR like that was exactly where she belonged, standing a distance away from the surgeons in the room, careful not to contaminate the sterile surgical field.

The room was deathly still, save for the sound of Lauren's voice as she instructed Jackson Avery on their next move and, hearing the familiar footfalls of his boss entering the room, Alex was the first to glance sidelong in her direction. "You know you can't be in here, Robbins."

Arizona nodded her head in understanding, but couldn't stop herself from demanding to know what was going on. "I just needed to make sure that everything. . ."

"Everything's fine, Robbins," Alex scolded, his attention moving to focus on the child lying before him. "All we have left to do is open the sutures before we close."

Arizona shifted her weight from side to side. "I. . ."

"Everything's going perfectly, Arizona," Derek gently stated, hoping his honest words would help to soothe her clearly frazzled mind.

Arizona nodded again, but continued to linger just outside the surgical field.

"Please don't make me get someone to escort you out of here, Robbins," Alex firmly continued, looking up into the worried eyes of his boss.

Arizona's gaze flitted around the room, never once landing on the only other female surgeon whose eyes remained focused downward on her sleeping patient, exactly where they should be. "I. . .I just really need this to work, Alex," Arizona whispered before pausing to clear her throat, her moist azure eyes focused only on the young man she had trained. "Olivia, Sofia, and Callie are my world. My. . .my entire happiness, my entire _life_ depends on you getting this right."

Alex's brown eyes stared knowingly into bright blue, and with determination present in his gruff voice, he spoke. "You taught me everything you know, Robbins. You made me who I am, and now it's time for _you_ to trust _me_. I promise you, I'll never let anything happen to you, Callie, _or_ your kids."

* * *

_**(Flashback: Five Months Ago)**_

_"Hey, momma?" Sofia asked from her position seated at the desk in the middle of her play room, her hand firmly gripping a pencil as she wrote her name at the top of a sheet of paper._

_"Yeah, babe?" Arizona responded from where she sat on the floor, alphabetically arranging the books on her daughter's shelf. _

_"What's pregnant?" Sofia innocently asked, never once looking up from the large ruled page._

_Stopping at the playroom door when she heard her daughter's question, Callie lingered in the hallway, awaiting her wife's response._

_"Where did you hear that word," Arizona calmly asked as she placed 'A Summery Saturday Morning' directly after 'Sam and the Firefly'. _

_Sofia gently set her pencil down on the desktop before standing to cross the room to sit Indian style in front of her mom. "Carson in my class said his mommy is pregnant and that he's getting a new brother. What's pregnant?"_

_Arizona sighed, finally glancing from the pile of books to look directly at her raven haired child. "Well, baby, pregnant means. . ." she trailed off, needing time to gather her thoughts._

_Taking her wife's silence as her cue, Callie finally entered the room, gently lowering her four month pregnant body to the floor and, pulling Sofia into her lap, she hugged the little girl close to her front. "Yeah, momma. What's pregnant?" she teased, her magical brown eyes twinkling with mirth._

_Arizona rolled her eyes at her wife's apparent delight in the face of her distress but, receiving a nod from Callie, she knew it was time for them to break the happy news to their eldest child. "Well, sweetheart, pregnant means Carson's mommy has a baby growing inside her belly. It means Carson is going to get a baby brother very soon."_

_Sofia seemed to consider Arizona's explanation and, scrunching her face in question, she turned her head to regard her Mami. "Like I was inside your belly?" she asked, her eyes lighting with realization._

_Callie nodded her head, leaning down to kiss Sofia's temple. "Exactly like that," she replied._

_They sat in silence for a few moments, Arizona mesmerized by the way Sofia's dark brown eyes seemed to take in all of this new information. "So, when can I have a new baby brother?" she questioned._

_Callie and Arizona both knowingly chuckled and, when Callie playfully tipped her head to the side, expecting her wife to answer, Arizona cleared her throat before she spoke. "Well, Sofia, you're going to have a new baby brother or baby sister very soon," she answered, happy to see her daughter's eyes exuberantly light up with excitement. "There's actually a new baby growing inside Mami's belly right now."_

_Sofia was quickly on her feet, staring down at Callie's middle in delight. "Really? Inside there? Right now?" she asked, her pudgy hands coming to rest over the slight swell of her mom's tummy._

_Arizona scooted closer to her family, tugging the little girl to sit on her lap. "Yep," she replied, her eyes now solely focused on the thoroughly ecstatic ones of her gorgeous wife. "Inside there. Right now," she repeated with a slight chuckle. "You're going to be a big sister very soon. What do you think about that?"_

_Sofia's face lit up again, her toothy grin brighter than all the lights in Times Square. "I think that's awesome, momma!" she cheered, leaning forward to kiss Callie's t-shirt covered middle. "Hey in there, baby. I'm Sofia. I'm your big sister."_

* * *

Sofia sat on Arizona's lap, her lanky legs crossing over to rest atop Callie's thigh as the little girl worried her bottom lip between her teeth, her eyes focused on the screen of the LeapPad in her hands.

Arizona gently stroked her daughter's silky raven hair, her mind a million miles away until she felt Callie's body tense at her side. Glancing toward her wife, she then followed her panicky gaze to the entrance of the room where Derek, Alex, and Lauren now stood.

Callie gently pushed Sofia's legs from her own, helping the five-year-old to her feet as she and Arizona briskly made their way across the room to speak with their youngest daughter's surgeons.

"Dr. Alex!" Sofia exclaimed when she saw her momma's protégé, taking off full speed and jumping into his awaiting arms. "Did you fix my Olivia?" she asked, her arms wrapped tightly around his neck.

Carlos and Lucia, Daniel and Barbara were quickly behind their daughters, all four grandparents anxiously awaiting the results of their infant granddaughter's surgery.

"Dr. Derek, did you help fix my Olivia, too?" Sofia excitedly asked, completely unaware of the somber looks on the three surgeons' faces.

When she still received no response, the little girl turned her attention to the only stranger in the room. "I'm Sofia Robbin Sloan Torres," she stated, holding out her hand in greeting.

An awkward smile curled at Lauren's lips as she slowly reached forward to shake the little girl's hand. "I'm Dr. Lauren," she curtly replied.

"Sofia, get down," Arizona gently scolded the child who continued to cling to Alex.

Watching as Lauren continued to hold Sofia's proffered hand, Callie's blood ran cold, her stomach twisting and churning as she watched the blonde surgeon's thumb move back and forth over her daughter's knuckles and, just as she was about to lunge forward to rip the tramp's eyeballs out of their sockets, Carlos moved from behind her, quickly gathering his granddaughter into his arms.

"Did you help fix my Olivia, Dr. Lauren?" Sofia still asked, unphased by her change in position.

"Would one of you please tell us _something_?" Arizona insistently demanded when all three surgeons continued to remain mum.

Clearing her throat, Lauren appeared almost pleased with herself when she finally spoke. "This initial surgery was a success, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to stick around. Olivia's going to need a follow-up procedure sometime next week."


	9. Chapter 9

**Title**: Clarity

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: M/NC-17

**Summary**: Three years after the plane crash, Callie and Arizona have reconciled their differences and are now the happiest they've even been. With their relationship now stronger than ever, will the necessary presence of a face from the past tear them apart? Will their marriage stand up to life's latest tragedy or will they find that they are in the exact same position they were years before?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Nine**_

* * *

_Clearing her throat, Lauren appeared almost pleased with herself when she finally spoke. "This initial surgery was a success, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to stick around. Olivia's going to need a follow-up procedure sometime next week."_

Arizona's face instantly fell, her heart slamming against her chest, her entire world spinning, twisting on its side and tunneling to a black abyss.

This wasn't how this was supposed to be happening. Olivia was supposed to have one surgery; no more than that. She was supposed to be okay so she and Callie could bundle her up into her car seat as soon as possible to take her home. Dr. Boswell was _not_ brought back here to ultimately fail or so she could find some reason to stick around.

Slowly turning to her side to speak to her wife, Arizona watched as Callie's eyes welled with tears, her mouth moving to speak but, with the accelerated beats of her own heart deafening to her ears, Arizona heard absolutely nothing, her shocked mind only allowing her the capacity to look on as the clearly distraught brunette quickly escaped the room.

The sensation of someone stepping up behind her, a firm, yet gentle hand on her shoulder quickly jolted Arizona from her stunned and detached reverie and, turning around, she saw the piercing blue eyes of her father urging her to go in search of her wife.

"I, umm. . .excuse me," she stammered before forcing her feet to propel her out of the waiting room and into the surgical hallway.

Finding the corridor completely empty and eerily quiet, Arizona sighed, turning to her left and then to her right before finally spotting her weeping mess of a wife seated on the floor twenty feet away, her head bowed forward as her back rested against the block wall.

Deciding to slowly approach, Arizona quietly took a seat next to Callie, her right hand instantly lacing with tanned fingers. They sat in silence for several long moments, both women finding a conflicting mix of strength and uncertainty, courage and fear in one another's presence and in every breath the other took and, suddenly turning to face her wife, Callie sighed before she spoke. "I talked to Dr. Boswell before Olivia's surgery," she simply admitted, her grasp on her wife's hand unrelenting.

Arizona's eyes quickly snapped in Callie's direction, fear and inquiry filling their cerulean depths. "What?" she asked, too surprised to voice anything else. "Why?"

Callie shook her head as tear after tear slid down her cheeks. "I know I shouldn't have. I know I should have waited until after, but I. . .I just couldn't help myself," she began to explain, her voice wavering with emotion. "I just. . .I needed to be sure. I needed to know that she wasn't going to allow anything to cloud her judgment, that she was aware of the reason why she's here. I needed her to know that she's here by _my_ choice, not just yours. She's only here because she is the best of the best, Arizona, and we needed the best."

Arizona's brow furrowed in question. "I know that, Calliope. Of course Olivia is the only reason she's here."

"You may know that, and I may know that, Arizona. Hell, the entire hospital knows that, but her. . .she. . .she's manipulative. She's calculating, a-a-and conniving, and I don't trust her," Callie contended, recalling every snarky remark Lauren had uttered to her earlier that day. "But I should have just let it go. I should have kept my mouth shut, but I didn't, and now this is all happening because of me. It's all my fault. Olivia is suffering because of me."

Staring into soulful brown eyes, Arizona felt her heart breaking even more than it had upon hearing that Olivia was going to need another surgery, because now, Callie blamed herself for this unfortunate chain of events. "This isn't your fault, Calliope. None of this is your fault."

"It is, Arizona. She's punishing me because I have you, and she doesn't. She. . .she's taking that out on our daughter. She. . ."

"No, Calliope. No," Arizona quickly interrupted, her index finger firmly pressing against two tear moistened lips to halt her wife's disjointed and impractical explanation. "This would have happened no matter what. Whether you spoke with her or not. . ."

"What if she wasn't focused, Arizona? What if she was thinking about what I said instead of what she was doing?"

Arizona shook her head, unwilling to allow Callie to blame herself for any of this. "She was focused, Calliope. I'm sure of it and, even if she wasn't, Alex, Derek, and Jackson were there the entire time. They're great surgeons, Callie, but they're also our friends. Really good friends who would never allow anyone to do anything that might place our child's life in jeopardy."

Callie quickly wiped at the moisture that trailed down her face, the honesty and rationality in Arizona's words, finally beginning to sink in and, with a heavy sigh, she leaned forward, her forehead coming to rest on her wife's shoulder. "God, Arizona. Why is this happening?" she rhetorically asked, not really expecting an answer.

"I don't know, Calliope. I don't know," Arizona whispered against brunette hair, her arms enveloping her wife in a protective embrace. "But I do know we're going to get through this. We're going to protect our family and keep it safe. We're going to make sure Olivia gets every treatment or surgery necessary and, if that means finding another surgeon, then that's what we'll do but, right now, we need to go talk to Alex and Derek and Dr. Boswell, and find out what went wrong. Okay?"

Callie only nodded against Arizona's neck, remaining completely silent.

"And I don't know about you, but I really need to go see our girl."

* * *

_**(Flashback: One Month Ago)**_

_With rays of early morning sun peeking through the curtains and casting flecks of light onto her face, Arizona rolled onto her back, stretching awakening limbs as her eyes slowly opened. Blinking against the brightness of the light that penetrated her retinas, she rolled onto her side toward the center of the bed, her arm instinctively reaching out for the warmth of her wife's body. _

_Finding nothing but the emptiness of the sheet, Arizona's eyes blinked open once more, finally spotting Callie lying precariously on the opposite edge of the mattress and, with a slight smile tugging at her lips, she scooted further across the bed, her arm wrapping around her wife's swollen middle to tug her more safely into the center of the king size mattress. _

_Taking a moment just to watch her slumbering wife, the blonde reached out to tuck dark hair behind Callie's ear before leaning in to press a whisper of a kiss against her jaw. _

_As Callie continued to sleep, Arizona forged a southward journey, first pressing her lips against the silky caramel flesh of her wife's throat before nipping at the feminine prominence of her clavicle. Soothing the reddened area with a sensual swipe of her tongue, she then continued downward, disappearing under the covers to gently push the black camisole her wife wore over her ever expanding baby bump as she simultaneously pulled the matching cotton pants to rest below her belly. _

_With the full swell of Callie's seven and a half month pregnant belly now exposed for her inspection, Arizona pressed a kiss to the top of it before trailing her lips and tongue down the sides of the taught abdomen, the corners of her mouth tugging into a smile when her loving attention was rewarded with a strong kick. _

_"Hi, sweet baby," she cooed, her lips remaining against her wife's skin to feel the early morning movements of the growing child nestled safely within. _

_A slight chuckle from above the duvet soon caught Arizona's attention and, with a final kiss against Callie's skin, she moved upward, reappearing from beneath the covers to see the brilliant megawatt smile of her wife. _

_"Good morning, pretty lady," Arizona softly spoke, pressing a gentle kiss against plump lips. _

_"Mmm, morning," Callie replied, scooting closer to burrow her face into Arizona's neck and, breathing in the intoxicating scent that was purely her wife, she securely wrapped her arm around the blonde's slim waist, her right leg working its way between two ivory thighs. "Sleepy. Don't want to get up."_

_"You sound like Sofia," Arizona teased, chuckling softly as she kissed Callie's cheek._

_"Smart girl," the brunette groaned against her wife's flesh._

_A contented sigh left Arizona's lips as she held her wife, her eyes falling shut as she reveled in being wrapped up in the cocoon of the brunette's groggy, but loving embrace, the movement of their unborn child thumping through Callie's skin to meet her own. "Should I just bring the Justice of the Peace into our home for the wedding?" she bantered, her fingertips absentmindedly drawing abstract designs over the smooth skin of Callie's bare arm. "You could stay in bed in your jammies. I'm sure the pictures would be amazing."_

_Callie smiled against Arizona's neck before pulling back with a laugh, magical brown eyes opening to meet bright blue for the first time that morning. "I'm already going to be the size of a house in these wedding pictures, Arizona. The least you can do is let me get dressed."_

_Arizona gently brushed Callie's bangs back from her forehead, leaning forward to capture her mouth in an intimate tryst of moist lips and lazy tongues. "This 'Calliope Look' is by far my personal favorite," the blonde husked against soft lips before pulling back to once again look at her wife. "Sleep tousled hair, no make-up, voice hoarse and groggy. . .mmmhmm. . ." she hummed with a wink._

_Chuckling at her wife's admission, Callie remained silent for a few moments, content to just stare at the beautiful blonde lying next to her. "We're getting married," she finally whispered, reverently kissing the tip of Arizona's nose. _

_"We're getting married," the blonde excitedly confirmed._

_Finally deciding she did indeed need to get up, Callie begrudgingly rolled onto her back before throwing back the duvet and swinging her legs over the side of the bed. With her hands resting atop her belly, she then stood to make her way into the ensuite bathroom, but paused suddenly, grasping at the chest of drawers to her right as a wave of dizziness inundated her entire being._

_Hearing the clanking of perfume bottles that sat atop the bureau as it struck the wall with the weight of Callie's body, Arizona quickly looked up from where she sat at the edge of mattress donning her prosthesis. _

_Witnessing her wife's struggle to take air into her lungs, she worked more quickly to don her leg. "Callie?" she frantically called, instantly standing once her leg was properly in place. "What's the matter?"_

_Callie shook her head, her eyes tightly closed as she breathed in through her nose, forcing the air back out her mouth. "I. . .I'm okay," she replied, finally opening her eyes, though she once again snapped them shut when the room blurred and continued to spin. _

_Unconvinced, Arizona took her wife's hands, leading her to sit at the side of the bed. "Are you having contractions?" she asked, her palms coming to rest at the sides of the brunette's belly._

_Callie blew out a breath, shaking her head to the negative._

_"Nausea?"_

_"No. Just a little. . .lightheaded," Callie admitted, slightly tipping her head back in an attempt to stop her world from spinning._

_Reaching out to the bedside table, Arizona grabbed a glass of water, handing it to her wife to drink. Watching as Callie did so, she then sat down next to her, a concerned hand gently moving up and down the long muscles of the brunette's spine. "I'm going to call the Justice of the Peace and cancel for today. I think we should get you to the hospital instead."_

_Callie shook her head, taking another sip of cool liquid from her glass. "No. I'm okay. I just stood up too fast," she contended with a smile, the color slowly returning to her cheeks. "And besides, nothing in the world could stop me from marrying you today."_

_Arizona smiled at Callie's response, though her heart continued to pound with worry. But, pushing her anxiety and apprehension to the side when her wife appeared to recover, she gently kissed her cheek. "Again," she added as clarification to Callie's statement._

_Callie reveled in the sensation of Arizona's cheek resting against her own, the feeling of smooth skin against smooth skin sending shivers down her spine and, with a kiss pressed beneath a fair earlobe, she confirmed, "Again."_

* * *

"Boswell was able to open the coronal suture, but we had a little problem with body temperature and volume of blood loss, so we. . ."

"What do you mean by a _little problem_?" Arizona quickly interrupted, demanding to get all the information from Alex who stood above her as she sat next to Callie in the NICU, her hand firmly clasped in her wife's, the brunette's other hand, resting over Olivia's heart through the incubator hand hole.

Alex wanted to roll his eyes at his mentor's attitude but, realizing right now she was a worried parent, not a world renowned pediatric surgeon, his face visibly softened. "She spiked a temp and experienced some bradycardia. I was worried about blood loss, so I thought it best to close, and then come back to finish sometime next week."

Dragging her attention that lay solely on the steady rise and fall of her baby girl's chest, Callie glanced up just in time to see Lauren approach, her grasp on Arizona's hand increasing ever further. "And Derek and Dr. Boswell agreed, correct?" Callie asked, her penetrating glare never leaving the contemptuous eyes of the blonde surgeon.

Lauren nodded her head, her eyes landing on the now steely blue ones of Arizona. "Yes. It was the appropriate plan of care. I know you. . .that we _all_ had hoped for the endoscopic approach to be completely successful, but I'm afraid that the open procedure may be necessary to open the sagittal suture," she stated before reaching out to place her hand on Arizona's shoulder. "We all want what's best for your little girl, and I'm going to do everything I can to make sure her next surgery is a success."

Arizona's body visibly relaxed upon hearing Lauren's heartfelt clarification though, Callie was completely unconvinced, her mind reeling at the sight of that woman's hand touching her wife, her heart racing at the way Arizona seemed to become more composed in Lauren's presence.

Feeling Callie's hand slacken in her grasp, Arizona immediately turned in her direction, and seeing the worry written over her every feature, she carefully removed Lauren's hand from her shoulder, her other hand adamantly holding on to the one that fit so well within her own. "Thank you, Dr. Boswell," she quickly replied, her tone tight and her gaze scrutinizing every move of the craniofacial surgeon's body and extremities. "Now, if you don't mind, Callie and I would like to be left alone with our daughter. _My wife _and I need some time to discuss our options."

* * *

_**(Flashback: One Month Ago)**_

_With Callie's hand held in her own, Arizona opened the passenger's side door of their large black SUV, standing diligently by as she climbed in. "Are you sure you're okay?" the blonde asked, noting the slightly ashen pallor of her wife's usually glowing caramel skin. _

_Settling into the seat, Callie buckled herself in, careful not to wrinkle the elegant dusky pink sheer lace maternity dress she had fallen in love with while shopping for an outfit for this occasion and, with a brilliant smile on her face she leaned out the car door to place a gentle kiss against Arizona's worried lips. "I'm fine, sweetie. More than fine. I'm amazing. I'm excited. I'm ecstatic to be renewing our wedding vows today, and I can't wait."_

_Arizona smiled at her wife's heartfelt sentiment and, after studying Callie's face for any sign of discomfort, she then quickly looked into the back to make sure Sofia was safely secured in her booster seat before gently closing Callie's door. Making her way to the driver's side of the vehicle, she climbed in, buckling her own seatbelt before pressing the door opener and backing out of the garage._

_As they drove, Sofia sang along with song after song on Radio Disney, Callie's hand never leaving Arizona's thigh as she gently ran her fingers along the satiny material of her dress. _

_She couldn't help but stare at the woman seated next to her, recently shortened blonde waves pinned back in the front to show off the pristine ivory skin of her face, just the right amount of make-up accentuating her gorgeous blue eyes. "You look beautiful, Arizona," Callie finally whispered after several long moments of loving inspection._

_Arizona quickly turned her head upon hearing her wife speak, a slight blush rising over her chest and cheeks as she glanced back toward the road. _

_"Momma always looks beautiful, Mami," Sofia piped in._

_Callie chuckled at the little girl's statement; truer words had never been spoken. "You're right, Sof, but I think momma looks EXTRA beautiful today," she clarified, her eyes never leaving the side of Arizona's face. "What do you think?"_

_"I think so, too. I like your new haircut, Momma," the little girl added, her sparkly tights covered legs happily swinging back and forth as they drove._

_Arizona found herself at a loss for words, the emotions of the day getting the better of her and, with a slight sniffle, she briefly glanced in Callie's direction, a smile tugging at her lips. "Thank you."_

_Callie leaned over, kissing her wife's jawline and, when she turned back to look out the front window, her brow furrowed in confusion. "This isn't the way to the courthouse. Where are we going?"_

_Arizona didn't speak, a sly grin now taking up residence on her face._

_"Arizona?"_

_Taking the next exit off the main road and, navigating the vehicle over a narrow two lane, Arizona remained silent for several long moments before hearing Callie gasp when realization set in. "Arizona? What did you do?"_

_Deciding her lack of response would no longer be acceptable to her clearly shocked wife, Arizona pulled the car into a parking spot, quickly turning off the ignition before exiting the car and making her way around to the passenger's seat. _

_Tugging open the door, she was surprised when Callie immediately slipped out of the car. "Did you seriously do what I think you did?" Callie asked, glancing around the area she was familiar with from years before._

_A sly smirk formed on Arizona's mouth and, taking Callie's hands into her own, she sighed, gathering her thoughts in order to speak. "Our life together started here, Calliope. In this very place, and it was amazing and beautiful, and just. . .perfect," Arizona softly began, watching as unexplained tears instantly formed in her wife's soulful brown eyes. "And when you asked me to marry you again, we decided that going to the Justice of the Peace would be fine, and it is, it really, really is, but. . .this place holds so much meaning for us, Callie. It's where I took you to be my wife, where we chose to spend the rest of our lives together, and. . .after all that's happened, after all we've been through, I just couldn't imagine marrying you in a dark, dusty courthouse, when I could be marrying you here. . .in the place where our life together officially began."_

* * *

Rocking back and forth on the couch in Arizona's office, Callie harshly dug the heels of her palms into her eyes, the tears that had started to spill from her eyes when they arrived there ten minutes prior, refusing to desist.

"Please, Callie," Arizona tried to soothe from her position seated next to her wife. "Please stop crying. I can't bear to see you like this. I. . ."

Callie shook her head, completely unable to stop the tears from falling. "I-I-I can't, Arizona. I. . .I knowingly put our daughter's life in danger a-a-and the doctor who did that is trying to. . ._claim_ my wife. I. . ."

Arizona couldn't believe the words that had just fallen from her wife's mouth; Callie had been so strong throughout all of this, but now, in the face of Olivia's need for another surgery, she was completely falling apart, succumbing to all her fears, all her insecurities, and all the emotions that were now consuming her.

"Sh-she-she. . . Olivia, Arizona. If-if something happens to her, I. . .I'll never be able to forgive myself," Callie stammered as choked sobs continued to wrack her troubled form. "And if she. . ._touches_ you again, Arizona, I-I-I. . ." she trailed off as her body quaked; she really wasn't sure _what_ she would do if Lauren ever touched Arizona again.

Arizona shook her head, carefully dropping to the floor in front of her wife and, taking two trembling hands into her own, she leaned forward, kissing the salty moisture from two reddened cheeks. "Look at me, Calliope," she softly beseeched when her wife only looked down at their joined hands. "Look at me," she said more firmly, taking Callie's face between her palms to guide her attention in her direction.

When stormy chocolate eyes finally met distraught and worried blue, another torrent of tears instantly welled in Callie's eyes before once again dripping down her face.

"I know you're worried, Calliope. I am, too. I. . .I'm honestly scared to death, but Olivia is going to be fine. She has to be," Arizona softly admitted, her own voice breaking with the weight of the emotions weighing on her own heart.

"She has to be. She just does. . ." Callie repeated, swallowing hard as she quickly shook her head in agreement.

"And I'm sorry, Calliope. So sorry, because I feel like I've neglected your needs. We all have," Arizona continued, her thumbs brushing at the tears that continued to mar her wife's skin.

Callie's brow furrowed in question, completely caught off guard by her wife's statement. "Wh-what?"

Leaning upward, Arizona pressed her lips to the tear moistened ones of her wife before leaning back on her heels to gaze up into curious brown eyes. "You just had a baby, Calliope. Your hormones are already a jumbled mess on top of having to make decisions about Olivia's surgeries and. . .Boswell, and I. . .I'm sorry, Callie. I'm sorry I haven't been taking better care of you."

Callie's eyes widened upon hearing Arizona's words; she hadn't really been taking the time to take care of herself, either, and the thought that she could possibly be suffering from the postpartum _baby blues _after Olivia's birth, simply hadn't even occurred to her. "Oh my God. On top of everything else, I'm crazy now, too!"

Arizona couldn't help the laugh that left her chest and, thankful for the crooked smile that now adorned Callie's mouth, she stood up to once again take a seat next to her wife. "You're not crazy. You're just a little hormonal, and understandably so."

Throwing herself back against the cushions of the sofa with a huff, Callie blindly sought out Arizona's hand and, clasping it within her own, she brought it up to lightly brush her lips against pale knuckles.

Arizona leaned into Callie's body, kissing the hollow beneath her earlobe before pulling back so she could meet watery brown eyes. "Crazy or hormonal, it doesn't matter to me, Calliope, because I love you. No matter what. Nothing will ever change that," she honestly admitted and, after clearing her throat, she decided she needed to continue in hopes of somehow easing Callie's conflicted mind. "And you don't have to worry about Dr. Boswell, okay?" she gently insisted, immediately recognizing the uncertainty and self-doubt that sprung forth in her wife's expressive brown eyes. "I understand your fears. I do. Because I'm right here with you, Calliope. All your emotions and all your concerns are mine, too but. . .you have to trust me. You have to trust in my love for you and that I learned a long time ago to never hide anything from you," she continued, her voice pleading, but strong. "So, please, _please_ believe me when I tell you. . ._that _will _NEVER _happen again. Never. Because. . .I love you, Calliope. I love you with no beginning and with no end. I love you without fear. Without expectations, and all I ask of you in return is to let me love you. To let me keep you in my heart. To believe me when I tell you I'm never going anywhere, ever again."

A soft sigh left Callie's body when she recalled those words and how she had teared up as Arizona had spoken then to her at their legal wedding ceremony just a month prior and, with happy tears now glistening in her eyes, she took her wife's hands as she began to speak. "These are the hands of your best friend. . ."

Arizona chuckled softly, pleased that Callie had recognized her sentiment and, with their eyes locked and their hands linked, she continued on, the symbol of the union of their hearts, their lives, and their souls, threatening to overwhelm her. "These are the hands that will work alongside yours as together we build our future. . ."

"These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, and with the slightest touch will comfort you like no other. . ."

"These are the hands that will hold you when fear or grief wracks your mind. . ."

Callie softly smiled at that line, realizing just how true those words were at this exact moment in their lives. "These are the hands that will give you strength when you need it. . ."

Arizona nodded, squeezing Callie's hands as tightly as she could, desperately needing just as much support right now as her distraught wife. "May these hands always reach out with love, tenderness, and respect. . ." she continued, reaching out with a gentle hand to brush a strand of brunette hair behind her wife's ear, the action wholeheartedly illustrating her point.

Callie closed her eyes, resting her cheek against her wife's outstretched palm but, once again looking at her wife, she cleared her throat before she continued. "And, may these hands continue to build a loving relationship. . .that lasts a lifetime."

The two women sat in silence for several long moments, neither willing to break the intimate gaze they now shared but, when Arizona felt the urge to once again reassure and console her wife, she softly whispered, "we're going to make it through this, Calliope. You, me, and our girls. . .we're going to be together forever."

* * *

_**(Flashback: One Month Ago)**_

_"I can't believe you managed to get all this organized without me knowing," Callie whispered into Arizona's ear, leaning into her wife's side from her seat at their table of the outdoor dining area of A La Bonne Franquette, the romantic atmosphere of their favorite French restaurant, offering the perfect setting for the intimate reception Arizona had planned after their wedding ceremony. _

_Arizona smiled, kissing Callie's cheek. "I have my moments," she teased, her hand resting upon her wife's thigh. _

_Glancing around, Callie took in the sight of their family and friends; Sofia sat on Daniel's lap as Carlos and Barbara went on and on about how beautiful the little girl looked in the dress she wore to closely match Arizona's casual, but elegant ecru tea length dress, the other tables around them filled with their happily chatting friends, Miranda Bailey, Richard Webber, and Owen Hunt, Jo Wilson and Alex Karev, Derek Shepherd and Meredith Grey, along with several of their other close friends from Grey+Sloan Memorial. _

_Callie couldn't believe how unbelievably perfect all this really was and, turning to speak to her wife, she was interrupted by the sound of Arizona's knife clanking against her water glass as the blonde stood in an attempt to gather everyone's attention. _

_With a glass of champagne now held in her hand, Arizona looked down at a surprised looking Callie, offering her a quick wink before turning her attention back to her now captive audience. "I know it's usually tradition for the father of the bride or the maid of honor to make a speech but, seriously, Callie and I have never really done things the traditional way."_

_Soft laughter filled the area, the sun beginning to set over the city of Seattle behind Arizona, providing a beautiful backdrop for the words she was about to speak. "Callie and I have been through so much, and I think the fact that she and I are here together right now, surrounded by the people we love, is a testament to the strength of our own love, the power and stability of our commitment to one another and to our family."_

_Arizona momentarily paused to gather her thoughts and, taking a deep breath, she turned from the small crowd to face her wife who shyly looked up at her, large chocolate eyes already moist with tears. "Calliope, four years ago, I first pledged my love and commitment to you on our wedding day but, until recently, I'm not really sure I knew what that meant," Arizona admitted, her hand tightly grasping Callie's as she continued to speak. "Because, well. . .it's easy to love someone when they're at their best, but true love is loving someone at their very worst, and I want to thank you for that. Thank you for loving me, for supporting me, for accepting me. For loving me when I. . .when I wasn't able to love myself."_

_A choked sigh left Arizona's lips as her emotions consumed her and, with tears now sliding down her cheeks, Callie stood from her seat, her arm moving to wrap around her wife's waist to offer all the support and all the encouragement she possibly could. _

_"I'm so happy to be here with you today. Despite everything. Despite all the despair. Despite all the darkness that has clouded our path," Arizona continued, her eyes never leaving her wife's. "I. . .I'm so glad I've been given the chance to reaffirm my commitment to you, and I promise to love you. . .for the rest of my life. A life I still have because of you. I'll never be able to thank you enough for saving my life, for being my protector, for loving me. . .despite all my imperfections. . ." she trailed off, clearing her throat before adding, "I love you."_

_Callie smiled at Arizona's hushed sentiment and, leaning forward, she brushed a gentle kiss against her wife's trembling lips. Pulling back, she nuzzled a pale nose with her own. "I love you, too."_

_The clearing of someone's throat brought the newlyweds out of their own silent moment and, turning to face the crowd, both women shyly smiled at the faces staring back at them. "I'm pretty sure it's your turn, Mija," Carlos encouraged, pressing his palm to his lips and blowing his daughter a kiss._

_Callie opened her mouth to challenge his request, but paused, feeling Arizona tightly grasp her hand in support. "I, umm. . .well, I guess I'm in a little bit of shock, but I would first like to thank all of you for being here today. For surprising me with such a beautiful ceremony and for supporting us through everything, no matter what," she began, her mind racing as she carefully chose her words. "Arizona and I have been through so much. We, umm. . .we've certainly had to endure more than any couple ever should, but somehow, we made it through. We suffered, but we survived. We were lost, but have been found," she continued, her voice gathering strength as she turned to speak directly to her wife. "Arizona, life is so unpredictable, nothing is a given, and there are so many uncertainties, but right now, I can honestly say that I love you more than I did on the day we originally took our vows, because. . .in being married to you, I've learned the value of understanding, the power of commitment, and the strength of being able to forgive."_

_Callie paused, removing the champagne glass from Arizona's grasp in order to hold both of her wife's hands in her own and, with her soulful brown eyes boring into the depths of tearful cerulean orbs, she smiled as she finished her thoughts. "So, today, I need you to know. . .all of me, loves all of you. You are the light in my darkness. You are my end and my beginning. I love all of your imperfections, Arizona, because you accept all of mine. You are the love of my life. You are without a doubt my soul mate. You are the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with."_

* * *

_**(Arizona's POV)**_

_After I broke my marriage, I was unsure for the longest time if it could ever be fixed but, at some point along the way, Callie and I finally decided that our future together was way more important than all the mistakes we had made. In realizing that, we knew that in order to make it work, we needed to make the conscious choice to work on our marriage, to resolve our issues, to recommit our lives to each other, because. . .at some point in our journey, we had grown apart, we had become people we didn't recognize, and we needed to repair that. We needed to encourage each other through our devotion to one another, to remind ourselves how much we truly meant to each other in order to keep the undeniable bond we share going strong. _

_When I married Calliope for the second time, I needed her to know our marriage was for life, and my commitment to her and to our family would be my life long concern through the good times as well as the not so good. I hope I was able to convey that message to her with my words because, for me, our recommitment wasn't just about lip reading some statement I really didn't mean, but instead, to speak from my heart and from my soul, knowing full well my every word would be locked away in my wife's mind for the rest of our lives together. _

_Of course, even though I meant every single word I spoke to her on that day, that didn't mean our marriage would never run into problems, but instead, that we now had a greater understanding, an undeniable commitment to our marriage even in the face of certain issues that were bound to upset the apple cart from time to time. _

_Clearly, no marriage is perfect; it's only what we make it out to be, and I'm not sure there could be any greater test than the one we are faced with at this very moment. But, I know deep down Callie and I are going to make it, because our marriage is important to both of us and, when we decided to get back together, we knew right then and there we wanted to remain married for life, through the good times as well as the bad. _

_But. . .I'm not blind, and I'm not dumb. I know it's not easy to completely forget the past even after you have forgiven, and sometimes marriages can go totally bad without either spouse ever having a clue, but things are so much different for us now than they were back then. _

_Callie and I have changed for the better. _

_We have become more willing and more repentant. _

_We have become more forgiving, and I find that. . .beautiful. Like an eyes-wide-open kind of beautiful. _

_It's unfortunate that we will never again be able to put our marriage up on a pedestal in a 'that could never happen to us' kind of category, because the reality is. . .that did happen to us. We stumbled, and we fell, but there is power in recognizing the truth and, with that power, my wife and I were able to build something stronger. Something better. Something that Lauren Boswell better not even try to tear apart._

* * *

An hour later as Callie sat in a rocking chair with Sofia on her lap and a sleeping Olivia, who Alex had finally permitted her to hold, in her arms, she paused, suddenly glancing upward when she heard Arizona's raised voice reverberate outside the NICU windows.

"You have got to stop this, Lauren!" Callie heard Arizona shout, her wife clearly unable to control her emotions or the volume of her voice. "I'm not stupid. I see the way you look at my wife, and I've heard the remarks you've made."

Callie watched as Arizona waved her hands in frustration before defiantly crossing them over her chest as Lauren began to speak.

"Oh, come on, Arizona," Lauren contended, reaching out to lay her hands in the shorter blonde's pink gown covered arms. "You know as well as I do that you brought me back here because you wanted to see me again. It's clear to me you have feelings for me, Arizona, and it's obvious I still like you. A lot."

Now on high alert, Callie was ready to hand off Olivia and Sofia to the nearest competent nurse she could find. She was prepared to rip Lauren's hair from her head or to assist her wife in any way she might need but, when furious cerulean eyes met her enraged brown, she watched as Arizona's features visibly softened at the sight of her rocking both of their little girls.

* * *

Arizona felt her heart swell at the vision of her wife gently cradling Olivia in her arms with Sofia snuggled into her lap and, without any care in the world other than to share in that beautiful moment with all three of her girls, she turned back toward Lauren, her gaze icy cold. "You have no idea how very wrong you are," she commented.

And without allowing the taller woman the chance to argue, she quickly stepped away, confidently entering the NICU to be with her family. To spend time with the only people who mattered, the people she loved and cherished more than anything else in the entire world.


	10. Chapter 10

**Title**: Clarity

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: M/NC-17

**Summary**: Three years after the plane crash, Callie and Arizona have reconciled their differences and are now the happiest they've even been. With their relationship now stronger than ever, will the necessary presence of a face from the past tear them apart? Will their marriage stand up to life's latest tragedy or will they find that they are in the exact same position they were years before?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Ten**_

* * *

_**(Flashback: Fourteen Months Ago)**_

_"What about a townhouse?" Callie asked from her position in the passenger's seat, her nose buried in the Homes and Real Estate section of the Seattle Times as Arizona navigated their Lexus SUV through the busy streets of Seattle. _

_"Too close together," Arizona replied, her nose scrunched in distaste as she drummed her thumbs against the steering wheel, anxiously waiting for the red light to turn green. "Not enough privacy, and I want something that's all our own."_

_Callie glanced sidelong at her wife as the vehicle moved forward, her brow furrowing in consideration as she carefully chose her words. "Are you sure you want to buy a house?" she asked, her tone guarded._

_Surprised by Callie's question, Arizona slowed the car to a halt at the next light, turning her attention from the crowded road ahead to land on the brunette who was staring back at her. "Of course I want to buy a house," she scoffed with a shake of her head. "Why would you even ask me that, Callie?" she continued, her tone slightly more harsh than she had intended._

_Callie sighed, neatly folding the newspaper and resting it on her lap. "It's just. . ." she paused, turning her attention toward the road when Arizona accelerated the car a little less smoothly than she would have liked. Realizing that she'd struck a nerve with her wife, she was about to drop the subject but, resigning herself to the fact that she needed to communicate her thoughts and feelings with her just like they vowed they would do in their many therapy sessions, she worried her bottom lip between her teeth before she spoke. "You just. . .you haven't liked any of the six thousand houses we've looked at, and. . ."_

_"It hasn't been six thousand," Arizona quickly denied with a sardonic laugh. "It's only been twenty-two, and besides. . .I just haven't found one that I like."_

_Callie studied her wife's profile, desperately trying to suppress the feelings of rejection that had crept up from somewhere unknown and, reaching out, she rested her hand on Arizona's thigh, hoping her comforting touch would prove to the other woman that she wasn't angry, but concerned instead. "You sure?" she softly asked, smiling crookedly when blue eyes found her own._

_Arizona found herself lost in those magical brown eyes she loved so much and, returning her wife's infectious grin, she offered a quick wink before lacing her own fingers through the tanned ones caressing her leg. "I just. . .I have this vision of you and me and Sofia in our new home, and I. . .I haven't found what I'm looking for. Yet. None of the houses we've seen have lived up to the home I've envisioned in my dreams," she honestly stated, the tension that had quickly filled the car, dissipating just as rapidly as it presented itself. _

_Callie pulled Arizona's hand from her jean clad thigh and, bringing it up to her own mouth, she brushed a gentle kiss against ivory knuckles. "Okay," she replied, cradling her wife's hand between her own and holding their joined fingers against her heart. "We'll keep looking. We'll find you your dream."_

* * *

_"This lovely Craftsman Style home was built in 1928," Tom, their realtor, commented, hoping beyond hope that this house would suit his clients' needs. "There's a circular floor plan with updates throughout, but the period details have been left intact."_

_"Bedrooms?" Arizona quickly asked, moving through the spacious living room and into the state of the art kitchen. Stepping up to the sink, she repeatedly began to turn the faucet on and off. On and. . .off. On. . .and off. _

_"Five," Tom instantly supplied, completely prepared for the blonde's line of questioning after showing the couple what felt like six thousand houses over the past couple months. "One bedroom and a full bath on the main floor, a generous master suite with his and her, umm. . .her and her closets, luxurious bath, and study upstairs with three more bedrooms and two more baths."_

_"Basement?" Callie and Arizona both asked at the same time. _

_This was Arizona's routine, and Callie had learned to just go with it, each and every inquiry she made and every monotonous action she engaged in, completely memorized word for word, step by step. _

_"Fully finished with a second fireplace, wet bar, rec room with theatre area, play area, and laundry," he continued._

_Arizona glanced up from where her attention was solely focused on the pressure and flow of the water into the stainless steel basin, a slight smile suddenly tugging at her lips for the very first time in their almost two month search for a new home. _

_Callie instantly noticed the change in her wife's demeanor and, glancing toward Tom, she excitedly gave him two thumbs up behind Arizona's back. _

_With a quick wink in Callie's direction, Tom then opened a door off the kitchen, motioning for his clients to follow him through. "And, the pièce de résistance," he teased, gently shutting the door behind them. "Spacious pool house built in 2009 along with this in ground swimming pool and jacuzzi, complete with a gorgeous patio, yard, and garden."_

_Arizona looked around the outdoor area, her eyes slightly squinting in the early afternoon sun. "Square footage?" she asked, her poker face quickly dwindling and giving way to an all too familiar dimpled grin._

_"Thirty-eight hundred above ground, plus nineteen hundred with the finished basement ."_

_"Lot size?"_

_"A little over two acres."_

_"Why are they selling?"_

_"Job relocation."_

_"Room for negotiation?"_

_"Yes."_

_"Hmm."_

_Callie watched the back and forth between her wife and realtor as if witnessing a tennis match, impressed as always, but definitely not surprised by Arizona's implicit knowledge and thorough inquisition and, when the blonde turned to examine a minor dent in an aluminum downspout, she and Tom shared a hopeful glance, but they both quickly sobered when Arizona turned back in their direction. _

_"So, what do you think?" Callie hesitantly asked._

_Arizona leaned forward to admire a deep blue hydrangea that lined the patio before straightening up to once again glance around the backyard. "My wife and I would like some time to discuss please, Tom," she spoke, running her hand over the HardiPlank siding that covered the exterior of the home._

_Tom gave a tight nod before quickly excusing himself. As he disappeared back into the house, gently shutting the door behind him, Callie opened her mouth to speak but, before she even had time to make a single word, soft pink lips were on her own, the force of the kiss nearly knocking her off balance and onto the cobblestone patio below. _

_With dazed eyes, she pulled back, nervously chuckling as she searched Arizona's face. "So, umm. . ."_

_"I love it, Calliope. This house. . .it's the one!"_

* * *

Seated in a rocking chair in the NICU, Arizona found herself mesmerized by the bundle that lay swaddled in her arms, the tiny nose on the baby's flawless face, an exact replica in miniature form of the one that graced her wife's face.

"So, Olivia," she cooed, smiling as dark brown eyes tracked the sound of her voice. "What do you think of all this craziness?" she rhetorically asked, a gentle fingertip brushing over the bridge of the baby's nose. "Lots of stuff going on for a three week old, huh?"

With a sigh, Arizona then shifted the infant cradled in her arms, smiling again when Olivia's mouth stretched into a wide yawn. "You sleepy, baby girl? Hmm. Me, too," she softly spoke, leaning forward to kiss a smooth caramel cheek.

Glancing up from the baby whose eyes drooped heavier and heavier by the minute, Arizona winked when she saw Callie enter the NICU doors with Sofia holding her hand, all four of their parents following closely behind.

"Hey," Callie whispered, gently brushing her lips against Arizona's cheek before taking one of Olivia's hands into her own to kiss tiny fingers that were balled into a fist. "Our parents are getting ready to leave with Sofia, so she wanted to come say goodbye."

"No, mami! No! I want to stay with you and momma," Sofia instantly argued, clinging to Callie's leg. "I don't want to go home!"

Callie took a seat on a rolling stool in the middle of the NICU, pulling Sofia up to sit on her lap. "We talked about this, sweetheart. Momma and I will be able to come home with you very soon," she tried to sooth, two arms wrapped firmly around her neck. "It's not going to be much longer. I promise. Olivia's surgery is tomorrow and hopefully after that, we'll all get to go home. Together."

Unconvinced, Sofia buried her face in Callie's chest, her eyes welling with tears as she began to sniffle uncontrollably. "I don't want to leave, mami. I want to stay with you and momma and Olivia."

Callie kissed the top of the crying little girl's head, her soulful brown eyes meeting the concerned blue ones of her wife. "Sofia, honey. . ."

"Why don't you take Sofia home," Barbara interrupted, smoothing her hand through the dark hair at the top of her eldest granddaughter's head.

"Mom. . ."

Barbara shook her head, holding up her hand to halt the argument she knew was about to come from her daughter's mouth. "Arizona, you and Callie have been at this hospital day in and day out for the past three weeks and, in that time, you've been home, what? Once?" she asked, even though she already knew the answer.

"Why don't you and Arizona take Sofia home for the night, Calliope?" Lucia encouraged, stepping up to stand next to the elder Robbins woman. "This is hard on her, mija. It's a huge change, and I'm sure she's missing you both."

Callie and Arizona shared an uneasy look; they knew this was difficult on Sofia, it was hard on them all, but they were just trying to do what was best for both of their daughters. The entire situation was miserably unbearable at times, and in the process of caring for one child, they had inadvertently neglected the other.

"The four of us are perfectly capable of spending the night with Olivia," Daniel stated, stepping up behind Arizona to place a fatherly hand on her shoulder. "I promise we'll call if anything happens."

"Go home, mija," Carlos added. "Spend some time with Sofia. Sleep in your own bed and come back first thing in the morning. We'll take care of things here."

* * *

"_And when you're alone, there's a very good chance you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants."_

An infectious giggle left Sofia's mouth at the silly inflection in Callie's voice and the magic in her twinkling brown eyes as she read, the little girl snuggling further into Arizona's chest as they continued to watch and listen to Callie read. "_There are some, down the road between hither and yon, that can scare you so much you won't want to go on. But on you will go though the weather be foul. On you will go though your enemies prowl. On you will go though the Hakken-Kraks howl. Onward up many a frightening creek, though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak. On and on you will hike, and I know you'll hike far and face up to your problems whatever they are."_

"Your turn, momma," Sofia happily insisted, taking the book from Callie's hands and passing it to Arizona.

The blonde smiled, watching as Sofia rolled over, cuddling into Callie's front and, with a mischievous glint in her eyes, she began to read. "_You'll get mixed up, of course, as you already know. You'll get mixed up with many strange birds as you go. So be sure when you step. Step with care and great tact and remember that Life's a Great Balancing Act. Just never forget to be dexterous and deft. And never mix up your right foot with your left. And will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! 98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed."_

"_KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!" _they all three shouted into Sofia's bedroom before dissolving into a fit of giggles.

"_So. . ._" Arizona dramatically continued, her eyes wide with mirth. "_Be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea, you're off to Great Places! Today is your day! Your mountain is waiting. So. . .get on your way!_"

Arizona closed the book with a climactic flourish, reaching behind her to place it on the nightstand before turning back toward her wife and child. "Time for bed, little miss," she said, brushing Sofia's bangs back from her face to place a loving kiss on her forehead.

Sofia nodded, already beginning to lose the battle with sleep. "Okay, momma," she said through a yawn. "Will you and mami come home with me tomorrow night, too?" she innocently asked.

Callie and Arizona shared a brief, but poignant look, and with a nod of her head, Arizona rested her hand on Callie's arm that was firmly wrapped around Sofia's waist. "Maybe not both of us, but I promise, from now on, mami or I will be with you. One of us will come home with you every night. How's that sound?"

The little girl scrunched her nose in consideration but, with a slight nod of her head, she agreed. "Sounds good. I miss you when you're not here."

Arizona smiled sadly, desperately wishing she could be with both of her daughters every moment of every day. "I miss you, too, big girl, but I promise things are going to change. Before you know it, Olivia will be able to come home, and we'll all be here together."

Sofia yawned once more, her eyes drooping heavily. "I love you, momma," she whispered before turning over to face her other mother. "Love you, too, mami."

Callie smiled, moving from the bed , but leaning down to kiss the tip of Sofia's nose. "Love you, too, mija. Sleep tight. . ."

"And don't let the bedbugs bite," all three finished in unison.

Rounding the double bed and stepping up next to Callie, Arizona laced her own fingers through tanned ones, flipping off the light and pulling the door closed behind them. Leading Callie into the sanctuary of their bedroom, she sighed as she threw herself down onto the edge of the bed. "I'm exhausted," she huffed, closing her eyes as she flopped backward onto the mattress with a bounce.

Callie silently watched her wife for several long moments and, turning toward the chest of drawers, she grabbed a pair of pajamas before disappearing into the bathroom, gently closing the door behind her.

Realizing she was now alone in the room, Arizona sat up, confused by her wife's silent behavior and mysterious disappearance. Callie had been quiet for most of the evening; they'd cooked Sofia's favorite meal, played dolls and worked way too many jigsaw puzzles, both participating in bath time and bedtime together and, while it was obvious that Callie was overjoyed to be spending some much needed time with Sofia, Arizona could tell something was amiss. The brunette seemed introspective and distant and, the fact that she had just disappeared into the ensuite bathroom to change her clothes instead of doing so in their bedroom, gave Arizona the slightest inkling of why.

With a heavy sigh, Arizona went about readying her own self for bed, pulling down the duvet and sheets before tugging off her prosthesis and settling herself into the intoxicating comfort of the familiar mattress and covers.

Callie emerged from the bathroom ten minutes later and, immediately turning off the lamp on her bedside table, she climbed under the covers, coming to rest on her back with her fingers laced together over her lower abdomen. Knowing that Arizona had most likely already surmised that something wasn't quite right, she lay silently gathering her thoughts as she stared up at the ceiling, the room now lit only by the street lights outside and the silvery glow of an eerily full moon.

Arizona remained silent for mere seconds before suddenly scooting as close to Callie as she possibly could, her left arm snaking around her wife's waist as she burrowed her right leg beneath those of her wife. "Calliope, I. . .I know we've talked about this. We moved past all of it a hundred years ago, but I just need you to know. . ."

Callie forced out an exaggerated breath. "Arizona. . ."

Pushing herself up on her elbow, Arizona sighed, staring down into dark brown eyes that glistened exquisitely in the light of the moon. Reaching out, she reverently ran her fingertips over the prominence of Callie's cheekbone before gently forcing her wife to look in her direction. "The fact that I slept with Lauren, back then. . .it had nothing to do with my feelings for you. . ."

"Arizona, please," Callie begged, shaking her head and squeezing her eyes shut. "I know. You don't have to say it. I already know."

Arizona dejectedly watched as a tear trickled from the corners of her wife's closed eyes before ducking her head to press a whisper of a kiss against each of her eyelids. "Look at me, Calliope."

Callie adamantly shook her head, too exhausted and emotionally frazzled to do anything more than cry.

"Please, Calliope. Please. . .I need you to look at me."

Callie sniffled, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth before blowing out a cleansing breath through pursed lips as she slowly did as her wife asked.

When watery brown eyes finally met cerulean blue, Arizona paused, staring into the depths of her wife's soul and, certain she now had Callie's full attention, she drew random patterns over her wife's neck and chest.

"I love you, Calliope. I've always loved you. I never _stopped_ loving you. It's hard to separate my feelings, and even more difficult to explain, but I can honestly tell you that what happened back then wasn't your fault. And, I know. . .I know that sounds crazy and maybe even a little farfetched, but it. . .it's the truth. I _have_ always and _will_ always find you miraculous. Breathtakingly stunning. What I did back then had nothing to do with the way I viewed you, but instead, it had everything to do with the way I viewed myself."

Callie searched Arizona's face; they had been through all of this before, and she believed her wife, she really did. Arizona had proven to her, not only in her words, but in her actions that she loved her and their family more than anything. It was obvious that Arizona regretted what she'd done, that she knew she had made an irrational decision and, while Callie had guiltily thrown herself into her work, trying to do what she thought was right for her wife in the only way she knew how, Arizona had done the same. She'd merely acted in a way that felt right at the time. And, despite all the heartache they both had caused each other, they had eventually healed, but healing was a process; one that ebbed and flowed and was ever changing. It wasn't an exact science and, in understanding that, it was clear that healing didn't necessarily mean old insecurities would never again rear their ugly heads.

"I'm sorry. I. . .I'm just a mess, and I'm feeling inadequate and insecure, and. . ." Callie trailed off, shaking her head as she brusquely wiped at her eyes. "I haven't felt like this in a really long time, and I know it's just me. I know my hormones are a mess, and I'm probably being a total moron," she admitted with a slight smile. "Because deep down, I know that we're together, that you're not going anywhere and that our family is going to be okay, but sometimes I let my fears get the better of me. I'm so unsure of what's happening with Olivia. I can't help blame myself, and now Sofia. . ."

Arizona shook her head, taking the sides of Callie's face between her hands and planting a firm kiss against tear moistened lips. "I love you, Calliope Torres. Nothing about you is inadequate. Nothing about this is your fault. And yeah, sometimes you can be a moron, but. . .You. Are. Amazing. You. Are. Great."

Callie chuckled softly through her tears and, allowing herself to be enveloped into the cocoon of Arizona's embrace, she buried her face in her wife's neck as she tightly held on to the woman she loved. "I love you so much, Arizona. You are the most beautiful person I've ever met. Inside and out, and I. . ." she trailed off against smooth ivory skin when Arizona rolled onto her back, pulling Callie along with her to rest on top of her smaller form. "Just. . .thank you. Thank you for loving me."

Arizona kissed every inch of Callie's face that she could reach, both women losing themselves in the security and warmth, safety and protection of their loving embrace. "I love you so much, Calliope, and we. . .we're going to be okay. We're going to get through this," she insisted, running her fingertips up and down the long muscles of her wife's back. "As long as we talk to each other, as long as we're honest with one another, nothing will ever tear us apart."

* * *

_**(Flashback: Eleven Months Ago)**_

_"How the Hell did we survive so long in that apartment without a bathtub like this?" Callie asked, raising one arm from beneath the water's edge and watching as bubbles dripped from her wrinkled fingertips. _

_"We had a tub put into Sofia's bathroom," Arizona mumbled through the toothpaste and toothbrush that filled her mouth. _

_"Yeah, but this. . .this is just so much MORE. It's got the jets and the seats, and there's more than enough room for two," Callie replied with a smirk before seductively wagging her eyebrows up and down. _

_Arizona chuckled softly, spitting into the sink and rinsing her mouth with a handful of water. "If I'd known a bathtub could make you this happy, I would have insisted we move to a bigger house years ago," she teased, stepping across the tiled floor to take a seat on the edge of the large garden tub where her wife was currently soaking. _

_Callie smiled, blowing a mound of suds from the palm of her hand before taking a deep breath and plunging her entire body beneath the water and the mountains of foaming bubbles. _

_After several long moments of submersion, she quickly reappeared, drops of water enticingly sliding down her face and hair to drip into the valley between her breasts. "So what do you think?" she asked, reaching out to take Arizona's hand. "You think this tub is big enough for two?"_

_Arizona bit her bottom lip, desperately wishing she was one of those water droplets that continued to travel down her wife's chest. "I'd say it's definitely big enough for two," she replied with a wink._

_"Care to christen it with me?"_

_Without a word, Arizona briefly pondered her wife's request before reaching down and pulling her tank top up and over her head. _

_"I'll take that as a yes," Callie teased with a laugh, intently watching as Arizona slid her yoga pants and panties down her legs before removing her prosthesis and slipping down into the warm water below. _

_With a brief peck at plump lips, Arizona settled herself between Callie's outstretched legs, and leaning back against her wife's chest, a contented sigh escaped her mouth as the warmth of the water penetrated her aching muscles and weary bones. They'd spent the better part of the past week getting their new house ready for move in, starting first with Sofia's bedroom and then the kitchen, followed closely behind by their own bedroom. They still had more boxes to unpack and rooms to complete but, when Callie had wearily deemed them finished for the day, Arizona refused to argue. Moving was certainly one of her top five least favorite things to do. _

_"Mmm, I have to agree," Arizona hummed after silently enjoying the heat of the water and the exhilarating sensation of her wife's naked body intimately pressed against her own for several long moments. Running her hands up and down the length of Callie's slippery thighs, she laughed when the brunette tickled her sides before enveloping her in a hug from behind. "This does feel pretty amazing."_

_"Mmmhmm," Callie agreed, wrapping her legs over the tops of Arizona's thighs as she pressed a hard kiss against her temple. "But, to be honest, YOU feel even more amazing," she contended, her fingertips boldly grazing over turgid nipples before cupping both of Arizona's breasts in her hands to delicately hold their weight. _

_Arizona shivered at her wife's pleasing touch, goose bumps rising over her exposed skin as her head fell backward onto Callie's shoulder. _

_Pleased with her wife's response, Callie ran her lips down the side of her face, plump lips attaching to the ivory skin at the prominence of Arizona's jaw. "You're beautiful," Callie husked, never stopping the ministrations of her tongue and mouth against Arizona's neck. "You are hot, and you are sexy," she continued, one tanned hand trailing down the flesh of a firm abdomen to play at the meticulously trimmed hair she found before cupping the soft mound of her wife's sex. _

_Raising her hips to press her center more firmly into her wife's palm, Arizona sighed. "What else?" she asked, darkening blue eyes fluttering shut. _

_Callie chuckled softly, pulling Arizona impossibly closer, her own aroused nipples caressing two alabaster scapulae. "Hmm, well. . ." she paused, a seductive smirk tugging at her lips as she ran the middle finger of her right hand gently along the length of her wife's slit. "You have these mesmerizing blue eyes that I could stare into every moment of every day."_

_Arizona nodded her head, swallowing thickly as two fingers sought out her clit. "Mmmhmm," she moaned, turning her head to kiss the tanned flesh at her wife's neck before nipping at her earlobe. "Keep going."_

_Callie laced the fingers of her left hand through those of her wife, bringing their arms to rest beneath two perfectly rounded breasts. "You're smart and honorable, strong and courageous." She paused, peppering a line of gentle kisses down the soft skin of Arizona's arched neck as she drew deliberate circles over a more than eager clit. "You're the best wife a person could ever have. . .and the best new house 'picker outer' in the entire world."_

_Arizona let out a bark of laughter at her wife's teasing remark, though her mouth quickly fell agape with a sharp gasp of pure bliss when Callie entered her with two insistent fingers. "Oh, God. . ." she groaned as she forcefully bit into her bottom lip, her hand tightening its grip on the fingers interlaced with her own as her free hand wrapped around Callie's neck to tug at the saturated brunette hair at the back of her head._

_"You're so gorgeous, Arizona," Callie husked into her wife's ear as her thumb began to furiously rub against a protruding bundle of nerves. "You do things to me that no one else ever has," she stated in a provocative tone, her own hips now rocking into Arizona's firm bottom with the same repetitive in and out rhythm of the fingers buried deep inside her wife. _

_Arizona's breath caught in her throat as Callie nipped and sucked at her pulse point with shameless teeth and wanton lips, her breathing becoming heavier and more labored as her wife's talented fingers and thumb continued their carnal work. "Don't stop, Calliope. You feel so good. Please, don't stop."_

_Unable to deny her own torturous need, Callie couldn't prevent her own hips from grinding against her lover's ass as she agonizingly slid her fingers from within Arizona's pulsing core to caress swollen folds. "You feel incredible, Arizona," she panted, licking at a bead of sweat that dripped down the side of a fair cheek._

_Arizona quickly turned her head, desperately capturing full lips with her own, groaning into Callie's mouth when the tip of her wife's middle finger deftly rubbed tight circles over her throbbing nub. "Please, Ca-Callie. Please," she begged in a hoarse whisper, overwhelmingly aroused by not only what Callie's fingers were doing to her center, but also by the fact that her wife was so unabashedly using her body to stimulate her own burning core. _

_"Mmmm, Arizona. God. So, so good," Callie breathed, once again plunging into her lover, burying her fingers inside Arizona's slick opening and quickly withdrawing before immediately thrusting back in._

_As the two frenzied lovers writhed and thrashed against each other, cursed expletives and shameless cries of pleasure echoed off the walls, the rapidly cooling water of the tub sloshing about to haphazardly spill over the ledge and messily splash onto the tiled floor below. _

_But, neither woman cared, both too focused on the overwhelming sensations of ecstasy that were currently consuming them, two wives intent on reaching the euphoric eruption they both knew was mere seconds away. _

_And in a flash of white light, Arizona came first, her back arching against Callie's heated front as her hand fisted in thick wet hair. A low guttural moan then ripped from her throat as her entire body went still before dissolving into shuddering convulsions, her core contracting with uncontrollable spasms around her wife's relentless fingers. _

_Racing toward her own pulsing moment of release, Callie greedily forced Arizona's body down onto her own, the friction of the blonde's backside against her throbbing member, inevitably pushing her over the edge. "Arizona!" she screamed in uninhibited satisfaction, her left hand clutching at her wife's, her toes curling painfully into the wall of the tub. _

_Nuzzling her nose against Callie's as their bodies trembled with the aftershocks of their lovemaking, Arizona continued to pull at brunette hair as their individual orgasms slowly began to subside. "Totally should have gotten you a bath tub years ago," she breathed as she gently caressed Callie's thigh with one hand, the other still holding on tightly to tanned fingers. _

_Callie chuckled breathlessly, whispering hushed 'I love yous' into her wife's ear as she gently removed her fingers from Arizona's center. "Bath tub sex with my hot wife is definitely my new favorite thing to do."_

_"Yeah?" Arizona questioned, turning her head so she could kiss her wife's flushed cheek._

_"Yeah," Callie replied with a contented sigh. "Sex in this tub was the first thing on my list of things I wanted to do in this house."_

_"You have a list?"_

_Callie nodded in reply._

_"Care to share what else is on said list?"_

_Callie smirked, opening her eyes for the first time since the earth shattering orgasm she'd just experienced ripped through her form. "It's a short list. I've only come up with two things so far," she replied, leaning forward to peck at bruised lips. "Sex in this tub and. . .making another baby in our new bed."_

* * *

With Sofia skipping between them and holding onto each of their hands, Callie and Arizona made their way into the cafeteria of Grey+Sloan Memorial Hospital at 9am the following morning. Glancing around the crowded room full of exhausted looking breakfast goers, Arizona spotted their fathers sitting in a secluded nook at the back of the room.

"How'd it go last night?" Callie immediately asked once they had made the short trek across the cafeteria.

Two sets of tired, but pleasant blue eyes looked up in her direction, Carlos and Daniel both smiling at the sight of their refreshed looking daughters and the brilliant toothy grin on their eldest granddaughter's face. "Very well," Carlos answered with a nod of his head. "We took shifts. Your mothers are with Olivia, now."

Callie and Arizona both breathed respective sighs of relief, taking a seat at the sides of their own fathers with Sofia now sitting on Arizona's lap. "Thanks for staying last night," Arizona stated, nudging her father with her elbow. "It was nice to spend some time at home."

Daniel smiled, removing the lid from the bottle of apple juice he'd purchased in anticipation of his granddaughter's arrival. "Of course, Arizona," he replied, taking a sip from his own to-go cup of coffee.

Glancing around the bustling cafeteria, Carlos spotted a particular tall and thin surgeon entering the room, his eyes squinting as he stared her down. "So, mija," he stated, wrapping his arm around Callie's shoulders as he watched Lauren disappear into the tray line. "The Colonel and I couldn't help but notice that there is a specific doctor roaming these halls who seems to be giving you and Arizona a bit of trouble."

Callie's brow initially furrowed in confusion but, glancing toward her wife, realization quickly dawned when she saw the look of understanding written in Arizona's wide blue eyes.

"So, we were wondering if there's something the two of us could do," Daniel hinted, pulling Sofia from his daughter's lap.

Arizona breathed deeply, nervously fidgeting with the sleeve of her sweater. "There's nothing you can do, dad. Calliope and I are handling things just fine," she adamantly stated, anxiously shifting in her seat.

Carlos shared a poignant look with Daniel before glancing between his daughter and daughter-in-law. "If she's causing problems, we'll take care of it, Arizona," he offered.

"Mr. Torres. . ."

"Daddy, please. . ."

"I mean, I won't hit a lady, but I know people, so just say the word, and I'll make it happen," the elder Torres continued.

"God, no, dad," Callie insisted with a slight chuckle and a roll of amused brown eyes.

"You sure?" Daniel asked.

Arizona rolled her eyes before closing them and shaking her head. "Yes, dad," she curtly answered. "We're sure."

* * *

_**(Flashback: Two Months Ago)**_

_The unmistakable sound of the contents of one's stomach hitting the water of the toilet bowl swiftly roused Arizona from her slumber, her body taking longer than her brain to register its wakefulness. _

_But, once her tired form was willing to move, she quickly sat up on the side of the bed, donning her prosthesis and the UGG boots that sat next to her bedside table for occasions exactly like this. Moving into the ensuite bathroom, she sighed, her arrival perfectly timed for her to see Callie lunge forward, her body lurching as she vomited into the commode. _

_With a heavy heart, Arizona grabbed a wash cloth and an elastic hair band from the linen closet, wetting the cloth with cool water before dropping to her knees behind her wreching wife. "Here, sweetie," she said, gently dabbing at her wife's forehead. _

_"Oh, God," Callie groaned as her body convulsed one more time, her abdomen contracting to rid itself of anything and everything that remained within. _

_Arizona sighed, pulling sleep tousled brunette hair into a messy bun before sliding the cloth down a sweaty cheek to land at the back of her neck. "How long have you been up?" she softly asked as Callie rocked backward, her back slumping against Arizona's chest. _

_Callie shook her head, closing her eyes as she blew out a cleansing breath. "N-not long. Just before you came in," she whispered, hastily leaning forward, dry heaves now wracking her exhausted form._

_Arizona moved right along with her wife, once again wiping a sticky brow with the cool cloth. "It's okay. You're okay," she tried to soothe, unable to do anything more. _

_Once again leaning back, Callie breathed deeply, her eyes meeting her wife's for the first time since she'd entered the bathroom. "Thank you," she whispered, resting her head on Arizona's shoulder. "But, I'm fairly confident I'm dying."_

_Arizona chuckled softly before kissing Callie's temple as she lovingly ran the tips of her fingers over the swell of an ever expanding baby bump. "You're not dying," she corrected, smiling when she felt a flutter of movement beneath her hand. "You're pregnant."_

_"Ugh," Callie groaned. "Feels more like dying."_

_They silently sat on the cool tiled floor, Callie's hands resting over Arizona's that now reverently cradled her belly. _

_"You ready to get up?" Arizona asked after several long moments of continuing to hold her wife. _

_Callie breathed deeply and, with a weak nod of her head, she moved back up onto her knees before attempting to stand. Now on her own feet, Arizona never left her wife's side, quickly reaching out to grasp Callie's arm when she began to wobble back and forth. "I've got you," she said as she helped her wife cross the room. "You okay?" she asked, making sure Callie was steady on her feet. _

_Nodding her head, Callie held tightly to Arizona's outstretched hand as she moved on shaky legs toward the sink to brush her teeth. _

_Finally making their way into their bedroom, Callie carefully crawled back into the bed, rolling onto her side and landing in the middle of the mattress. Arizona lay next to her, wrapping an arm around her waist and kissing her cheek. The fatigue Callie was experiencing was evident in her sullen brown eyes, her usually caramel skin a shade lighter and a sickly gray. _

_"I feel like total ass," Callie groaned, swallowing hard. "I don't remember being this sick, for this long, with Sofia."_

_Arizona reached out, brushing Callie's bangs off her forehead. "You weren't pregnant for this long with her," she softly stated, sadness evident in her eyes._

_Callie sighed, snuggling further into her wife's embrace. "So this is a good thing, right?"_

_Arizona nodded, sliding her knee between her wife's legs. "Definitely." _

_They lay in silence for a few moments, both lost in their own thoughts of Sofia's untimely birth combined with how much they were looking forward to meeting their new little bundle of joy. "Let's stay home today," Arizona offered, leaning up on her elbow to stare down at her wife. "Sofia already has today off school. Let's just take the day to relax. You, me, and our girls."_

_Callie smiled, loving the way the word 'girls' sounded coming from Arizona's mouth. "I think I could handle that," she teased._

_"Good," Arizona said, pecking at her wife's cheek. "Because today, Sofia and I are going to take care of you."_

* * *

With her hand held firmly within her wife's, Callie fiddled with the iPhone in her free hand, the latest gossip on _Twitter_ and _Facebook_ doing little to calm her racing mind.

"This is ridiculous, Arizona," she anxiously stated, tossing her phone down onto the table in front of her as she stood from her seat in the surgical waiting room where they had been stewing for the past two hours. "Let's just go up to the gallery."

"Callie. . ."

"Just for a few minutes."

"Calliope. . ."

"They can kick us out if they want, but at least we could. . ." Callie trailed off, halting in her nervous rambling and anxiously paced circuit around the room when she saw Alex Karev appear through the swinging double doors.

"Karev. . ." Arizona breathed out, quickly jumping from her seat to cross the room in order to speak with the younger surgeon.

Callie was immediately at her side and, swallowing thickly, she reached out to take a trembling ivory hand between her own. "H-how'd it go?" She swallowed again, her mouth suddenly as dry as the Sahara. "How is she?"

Reaching up, Alex pushed his scrub cap from the top of his head, his poker face suddenly morphing into an uncharacteristically chipper grin. "The surgery went great. They're taking her up to the NICU right now, and you can see her in just a few."

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Callie sat next to Olivia's incubator, one hand resting inside to lovingly trace soothing patterns over the little girl's soft skin. Leaning back against Arizona who stood behind her with her hands resting on her shoulders, Callie sighed. "I'm so happy right now, I don't know what to do with myself, Arizona. I can barely even make words," she admitted, nudging her wife's side when she sat on a stool next to her.

Arizona nodded in understanding, the emotions coursing through her own body and soul completely overwhelming her. "She's perfect, Calliope. Beautiful. And we're going to get to take her home with us before we know it," she stated, kissing Callie's temple.

A lone tear trickled down a caramel cheek and, with a quick swipe of her hand to brush it away, she turned toward Arizona, a megawatt smile lighting her face. "Can you believe it? I mean, I know she's ours, a-a-and that we were eventually going to get to take her, but. . ." She paused, shaking her head.

"It's okay, Calliope," Arizona insisted with a grin. "I know exactly what you mean."

With a silent understanding transpiring between them, they turned back toward the sleeping infant, both content to do nothing more than watch the steady rise and fall of her tiny chest.

"Oh, shoot," Arizona soon exclaimed, quickly popping up from her seat. "I need to call our parents. Will you be okay if I step into the hall?"

Callie nodded with a wink, watching her wife exit the NICU doors before turning back toward the mesmerizing sight of her baby girl.

Once in the hallway, Arizona pulled her phone from the back pocket of her jeans and, leaning against the tiled wall, she was wholly unable to wipe the ecstatic grin off her face as she dialed her phone.

"Arizona. . ."

Glancing toward the familiar voice, she slowly lowered the phone from her ear, her eyes closing as she shook her head. "Not today, Dr. Boswell," she warned, turning from the taller surgeon to find a more private area to complete her call.

"Arizona, please," Lauren softly beseeched, reaching out to grasp the fleeing woman's arm. "I'm leaving tonight, and I just. . .I hoped we could talk. I really hoped you would give me another chance."

Begrudgingly turning around, Arizona carefully considered her words, overwhelming frustration now evident in her tensed shoulders and scowling face. "I don't want to hear any more of this, Lauren," she shouted, her arms flailing to emphasize her point.

"But I like you, Arizona. Really like you, and I. . .I think that we could have something. I think _we_ should give _us_ a chance."

Arizona rolled her eyes at the blonde's pleading words, completely unwilling to even consider her argument. "_This. . ._" she moved her arm, gesturing between herself and the taller blonde, "you and I aren't going to happen, Lauren. _EVER_ again. There is no _us_. There is no _we_. There is only a me and a Callie and a Sofia and an Olivia. There isn't a Lauren or-or-or a Dr. Boswell _ANYWHERE_ in that equation. So please, Lauren! Please stop trying to tear apart my family!"

And with that, Arizona turned to return to her wife and youngest child but, spotting Callie quietly standing behind her, she paused, taking in the shocked, but undeniably pleased expression on her wife's face. Staring at the love of her life for several long moments, she then turned back around one final time, but before she could speak, Callie beat her to it.

"My wife and I will forever be grateful for what you've done for our daughter, Dr. Boswell," Callie began, her eyes never leaving the surprised ones of the taller blonde. "Because of you, Olivia is going to live a happy and healthy life but, beyond that, _we_ don't need you here. Not anymore. Your services are no longer warranted at this hospital, Dr. Boswell, and it's time for you to leave."


	11. Chapter 11

**Title**: Clarity

**Author**: HandsThatHeal

**Pairing**: Callie/Arizona

**Rating**: M/NC-17

**Summary**: Three years after the plane crash, Callie and Arizona have reconciled their differences and are now the happiest they've even been. With their relationship now stronger than ever, will the necessary presence of a face from the past tear them apart? Will their marriage stand up to life's latest tragedy or will they find that they are in the exact same position they were years before?

**Disclaimer**: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.

* * *

_**Chapter Eleven**_

* * *

Making sure Sofia was safely tucked in beneath the mountain of plush blankets covering her bed, Callie arranged the sheet and duvet just the way her daughter liked them, a small cup of water positioned perfectly next to the pink lamp on her bedside table.

"Does _my_ Olivia _really_ get to come home tomorrow, mami?" Sofia softly asked from her position snuggled comfortably in the center of her bed.

Callie sighed, smiling brightly at the inquisitive five-year-old and, taking a seat on the edge of the mattress, she reached out to straighten the collar of the little girl's pajamas. "Yes, mija. _Your_ Olivia _really _gets to come home tomorrow," she replied, stroking raven hair back from her daughter's face.

Sofia pursed her lips in suspicion, pulling her arms from beneath the covers to cross them over her chest. "Do you promise?" she asked. "Like really, _really_ promise?"

Callie scooted up the side of the bed, taking two defiantly crossed arms into her hands. "Well, sweetie, when momma and I left the hospital this afternoon, Dr. Alex told us as long as everything goes okay tonight, then yes, Olivia can really, _really_ come home tomorrow morning," she explained.

Receiving a dejected sigh from her daughter, Callie worried her bottom lip between her teeth before deciding to continue. "I know you want Olivia to come home, baby, but we have to do what's best for her."

Still unconvinced, Sofia continued to sadly stare at her mother.

Disheartened by those disarmingly melancholy chocolate brown eyes, Callie decided to change her tactic. "Umm. . .maybe you and I should say a little prayer," she offered, holding smaller hands in her own. "Maybe we should pray that Olivia does well through the night, so we can bring her home. What do you think?"

The little girl remained silent for several long moments before pushing herself up to jump off the bed. Kneeling at its edge, she rested her elbows on the mattress, eyes closed and palms pressed together, ready to pray.

When Callie didn't move quickly enough to join her, Sofia instantly opened one eye, sighing impatiently as she motioned for her mother to mirror her position. "Come on, mami. We need to pray."

Callie's heart swelled at the sight of the little girl so desperately wanting her baby sister to come home and, slipping from the bed, she knelt beside Sofia, her own arms and hands reverently positioned in prayer.

"Father, unto thee I pray. Thou hast guarded me all day. Safe I am while in thy sight, safely let me sleep tonight. Bless my friends. . ." Sofia trailed off, once again opening one eyes to gaze up at her mother.

"Go ahead, mija," Callie urged with a slight nod of her head.

Sofia pondered what to do next, her bottom lip held between her teeth. "Can I change it?" she innocently asked.

Callie couldn't help but smile at the simplicity of her daughter's request and, gently running one hand up and down the little girl's pajama clad back, she nodded her head. "Of course, sweetheart. It's your prayer. God will listen to you no matter what you say."

Nodding her head, Sofia once again closed her eyes, her face scrunching as she considered what she should say next. "Bless my friends. . ." she then repeated, "and bless my mami and my momma. Bless Pop-Pop and Grammy and Abuela and Abuelo. Bless Dr. Alex and Dr. Derek and Dr. Lauren who fixed _my_ Olivia. Bless _my_ Olivia, and please, please, _please_ let her come home tomorrow because I really want to play with her. . ."

Callie remained still, mesmerized by the beautiful little girl at her side, the innocence of her every word and the purity of her invocation, causing tears to brim in her eyes.

". . .the whole world bless, help me to learn helpfulness. Keep me ever in thy sight, so to all. . .I say good night."

Finally satisfied with her prayer, Sofia scrambled back up onto the mattress, diving beneath the covers before Callie could even stand from her position, still kneeling at the side of the bed. "Do you think that will work?" the exuberant child asked her mother who was briskly wiping at her eyes with the back of her hand.

Nodding her head, Callie swallowed hard. "Yeah, baby. I think that prayer is definitely going to work."

* * *

Stepping from Sofia's room, Callie gently closed the door behind her before retreating into the solace of her own bedroom. Surprised when she didn't find Arizona already there, she looked in the ensuite bathroom, her brow furrowing when she didn't see her wife there either.

Moving back into the hallway, she first glanced into the playroom but, finding it empty, she then made her way to the nursery door. Gently pushing it open, she finally discovered her missing wife leaning over an antique white dresser, the soft glow from a small lamp providing the only light in their infant daughter's bedroom.

Hearing the blonde mumble and curse to herself as she punched at the buttons on the apnea monitor that rested on the corner of the dresser, Callie chuckled softly before quietly entering the teal, purple, and white room, her arms immediately moving to wrap up Arizona from behind.

"Shit!" the blonde immediately exclaimed, jumping in her wife's arms. "God, Calliope. You scared the crap out of me!" she continued before relaxing slightly in the taller woman's embrace.

Callie only held her wife tighter. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to startle you," she apologized, pressing a gentle kiss against an alabaster cheek and then another near the hollow beneath her wife's ear. "You okay?" she asked, her chin now resting on a faded Johns Hopkins Blue Jays sweatshirt clad shoulder.

Arizona shook her head, sighing in exasperation. "I can't figure out this stupid new apnea monitor. It's different than the ones at the hospital, and I've been standing here for the past thirty minutes trying to figure it out, but I just. . .it's not doing anything. I think it's broken."

Callie slowly released her wife, searching her frustrated features before taking the monitor's instructions into her own hand. Instantly spotting the problem, she turned back toward Arizona but, finding that the agitated blonde had already moved across the room to make sure the diapers, wipes, baby butt cream, and lotion were perfectly stacked and placed on the changing table, Callie waited, taking her time to adjust the monitor's wires and settings.

With a sudden sense of foreboding, Callie then watched as her wife obsessively went back and forth over the supplies, her muttered ramblings quickly catching her ear. "Diapers, wipes, burp cloths. Plenty of blankets. Desitin. O2 concentrator. . .just in case. Apnea monitor that doesn't work. Swing. Tear free baby wash, towels, washcloths. . ."

Not wanting to frighten her distracted wife from her meticulous focus on their overabundant amount of supplies, Callie didn't immediately approach her, softly clearing her throat instead. "I. . .umm. . .I fixed the monitor," she informed, her eyes widening when Arizona quickly whipped around in her direction.

"Oh. Okay. Great," Arizona distractedly replied, padding across the hardwood floor to look into Olivia's closet.

"Arizona. . ." Callie called, knowing her wife had slipped into an overwhelmed cloud of type-A behavior but, receiving no response from her overly concentrated wife, Callie sighed, following behind. "Time for bed, sweetie. Big day tomorrow," she quietly continued, taking one of Arizona's hands and interlacing ivory fingers through her own.

Chewing on the inside of her jaw, Arizona stood on her tip toes, reaching with her free hand into the top of the closet for a plastic container housing a brand new pediatric thermoscan ear thermometer, baby Tylenol, saline nose drops, and various other medical supplies. "You go ahead," she distractedly replied. "I need to make sure we have everything ready. I think we may need more diapers and extra oxygen tubing. . ."

"Arizona. . ."

"Probably some more formula and bottles, and one of those mirrors that hook onto the car seat like we had with Sofia. . ."

"Arizona. . ."

"Oh, crap, Callie! I forgot about the car seat. I still need to hook the base into the back of the SUV."

"Arizona!"

Callie's calling of her name in a raised tone finally caught Arizona's attention. "What?"

"We're ready, babe. We have everything we need and more," Callie softly spoke, pulling Arizona to stand directly in front of her. "We'll hook the car seat into the car tomorrow morning before we leave for the hospital, and we'll steal oxygen tubing from the NICU when we get there. It's no big deal."

Arizona opened her mouth to argue, but seeing the worry and concern written across her wife's every feature, she slowly deflated, her shoulders slumping slightly from the tensed position they had been firmly set in ever since they'd arrived home hours before.

"You're right. I. . .I'm sorry. I'm just. . ." she trailed off with a shake of her head.

Callie nodded her head in understanding, reaching out to brush stray blonde hair behind Arizona's ear before gently cupping two fair cheeks in the palms of her hands. "I know, honey. You're worried. We both are, but everything's going to be fine," she insisted, leaning forward to capture pink lips in a gentle kiss.

Slowly pulling back, Callie then pressed another kiss against the tip of her wife's nose.

Nodding her head, Arizona leaned in, allowing Callie to envelope her in a warm embrace. "I love you, Calliope," she earnestly whispered into the smooth skin of her wife's neck.

Callie chuckled softly, Arizona's breath tickling her flesh. "Of course you love me," she cheekily replied, pulling back to wink at her wife. "Because just like you, my dear, _I_ am pretty damn awesome."

* * *

Gazing down at the sleeping form next to her, Arizona sighed, trying mightily to resist the overwhelming urge she was feeling to gently run her fingertip over one of her wife's perfectly manicured eyebrows.

"You know," Callie groggily mumbled after several long moments of feeling piercing blue eyes penetrating her soul. "For someone who freaks out when I watch her sleep, you've been doing a lot of it this morning," she teased, though her lips remained in a firm line.

Arizona chuckled softly at the sound of her wife's sleep laden words and throwing herself onto her back with a huff, her eyes now stared at the ceiling as her hands fidgeted with the duvet resting beneath her breasts.

Sensing her wife's continued apprehension and distress, Callie scooted closer to the tense form in the bed next to her, a caramel arm snaking around a slim waist as a brunette head came to rest upon Arizona's shoulder. "Everything's going to be okay, you know," she insisted, her lips lightly brushing over the exposed ivory flesh of a prominent clavicle.

Arizona sighed again, her hand acting on its own volition to tangle in the thick brunette hair at the back of her wife's head. "This past month has just been so. . ." she trailed off with a shake of her head.

"Draining?" Callie offered, forcing her lips from creamy skin so she could gaze down at her wife's beautiful face.

"Terrifying. . ."

"Unexpected?"

"Full of uncertainty. . ."

Callie gently ran the pad of her thumb over Arizona's jawline, the other hand smoothing errant blonde hair back from her forehead. "But incredibly life-affirming, Arizona. Eye-opening and miraculous in so many ways," she honestly continued. "It definitely wasn't ideal, and I certainly would never wish for any of our children to be born with such complications, but I. . ."

Watching as Callie sheepishly dropped her gaze, Arizona rolled onto her side, and pressing up against her wife's chin, moist brown eyes once again met her own. "But what, Calliope?" she softly urged.

Callie sighed, swallowing hard as she aimlessly played with the strap of her wife's camisole. "I. . .umm. . .I feel that we're. . .stronger for it. Our marriage. Our family. All of it," she nervously began, her voice growing in certainty with every spoken word. "Our entire lives came crashing down around us once _again_, but we didn't falter. We didn't succumb to the trepidation and the fear like we've done so many times before. Because we. . .we're stronger. We're more courageous. We're more confident in ourselves and in our life together, and I'm thankful for that. I'm glad that _this_ time, we were able to _stand up_ to such a test of our love and our commitment to one another."

Arizona smiled, leaning forward to capture plump lips in an intimate tryst that she hoped would convey her feelings, that she too felt that they were in a better place in the marriage and in their life together than they had ever been before. "I'm glad, too," she simply agreed in a hushed whisper when she finally pulled back, her palms still possessively resting against the silky smooth sides of her wife's face.

Callie smiled at the purity of Arizona's response; she didn't need her to say anything more. She could see the honesty and certainty written across her every feature - in the deepest recesses of her soul and in the furthest depths of her magical blue eyes.

Nuzzling her nose against that of her wife, Callie hummed in contentment when Arizona pulled her into a loving embrace. "You ready?" the brunette asked after several long moments of amicable silence.

An excited, dimpled grin consumed Arizona's face, causing the line of Callie's lips to morph into a brilliant megawatt smile of her own. "Definitely," Arizona replied with an exaggerated nod of her head. "I can't wait to bring her home, Calliope," she admitted through an infectious round of laughter.

Kicking her feet beneath the covers in overwhelming elation, Callie pulled her wife tightly against her as they both dissolved into a fit of giggles. "Me too, babe. Let's go get our girl."

* * *

_**(Callie's POV)**_

_Usually Arizona is the driver in our family; I think it has something to do with her need to be in control, and I am happy to relinquish the wheel in order to allow her that privilege. I'd much rather be the one to tend to our children's' needs instead of the obscene traffic planning, terrible overpopulation, and horrible drivers Seattle is known for. If she wants it, she can have it but, today, she happily sits in the back seat with our two gorgeous little girls._

_Glancing up into the rear view mirror as I navigate our SUV through the streets of Seattle, I can't help but smile at what I see. Sofia sits in her booster on one side of Olivia's rear facing car seat, my beautiful wife on the other side, a super magic smile covering her face for all to see._

_There was a time when I wasn't sure I would ever see Arizona this happy again; a time when she was so depressed and unclear about what she wanted out of life that I was sure she would become lost in a downward spiral that would leave her forever altered. _

_But, looking back at her right now, I can't help but think she somehow seems. . .younger. Brighter. Perkier and more confident in herself than she has been in years. In this moment, my wife seems more like that hot new peds surgeon who kissed me in a dirty bar bathroom over seven years ago, not the woman who suffered a near fatal car accident that almost cost her our eldest daughter and myself, and certainly not the frightened and despondent woman who endured four days in the mountains after a plane crash that cost her not only a physical part of herself, but a psychological one, as well._

_The woman who is now seated behind me is stronger than that, and I honestly can't take my eyes off of her. She's quite simply mesmerizing. She's miraculous. She's amazing. She's just so. . .happy. So excited. So in awe of the beautiful little girls who are currently sharing the back seat with her. _

_Arizona and I have endured so much together and, through this experience with her, I've learned so much. Not just about her, but about myself and about our marriage. I now know I am stronger than I ever thought possible. That there has to be a little dark in order to find the light, and I can definitely see that light right now as I look back at my wife._

_Moving my right foot from the brake to the gas petal, I force myself to look out ahead of me, but my thoughts remain on my wife. _

_She's such a fighter; a person who didn't stop living. She didn't bury her head in the ground and forever shy away from human contact and affection. _

_Instead...she stood tall. She was brave. She fought. She struggled, and she failed. She slipped, and she faltered. She lost, and she broke but, in the end, she healed, because after so much time, she chose to love. Not just me and not just our marriage and our life together but, more importantly, she chose to love herself and, in doing so, she came out of it better than the person she was before. _

_We both did. _

_Because. . .we chose clarity. We chose love. We chose hope even in the face of our biggest disappointments. Arizona and I chose to fight to be together because somewhere along the way, we both realized we were stronger than any one of the mistakes either of us had made and, as I sneak another glance back at the woman I love, crystal clear cerulean eyes finally meet mine and, in that moment, I know without a doubt that I've never made a better decision in my entire life. _

* * *

With the wide-eyed infant cradled in her arms, Callie sighed as she gently ran the pad of her index finger over the bridge of a tiny little nose, a sigh leaving her lips as she rocked back and forth in the antique rocker in the corner of her daughter's bedroom.

"_Well, Olivia is taken, but a look like hers can be found from time to time_," Callie softly began to sing. She wasn't sure the song was necessarily appropriate to turn into a lullaby, but it had been stuck in her head for the past hour, so she thought why not? "_Yeah, Olivia is taken, but a look like hers can be found from time to time. I'm thinking something like Olivia is what I need to find. I keep thinking, something like Olivia is what I need to find. . ."_

"That song's silly, mami," Sofia laughed, looking up from where she lay coloring a picture on the rug in the middle of the nursery floor.

"You think?" Callie asked, smiling when she saw Arizona enter the room from the hallway.

"Bedtime, Sofia. Let's go," Arizona informed, though her actions betrayed her words as she took a seat on the ottoman in front of her wife to lovingly gaze down at their still wide awake newborn. "No luck?" she asked with a rueful smile.

Callie shook her head, a slightly frustrated huff leaving her chest. "Nope. Not yet," she admitted, switching Olivia from her arm to rest against her chest. "I've tried all of Sofia's favorite songs and even turned John Mayer into a lullaby, but she's still wide awake."

Reaching out, Arizona lay her hand against the baby's sleeper covered back. "She's just not used to being home, yet. We'll get there," she softly stated, smiling when Sofia moved from the floor to curl up into her lap.

"Can I try?" Sofia innocently asked as if putting an uncooperative baby to sleep was the easiest thing in the world.

Callie and Arizona shared a smile and a wink and, handing Olivia off to her wife, the brunette then motioned for Sofia to sit on her lap, propping her up so she could support the baby that Arizona carefully placed in her awaiting arms.

"Okay, mami. You rock. I'll sing," Sofia instructed, holding her sister like she'd been doing so for years.

As Callie gently began to rock her girls in the chair, one of Arizona's hands came to rest on her wife's thigh, the other gently brushing over Olivia's tightly held fist.

"_They say. . .good night, Olivia, your big day is through, but how can you sleep, when there's still so much to do?_"

Recognizing the song from Sofia's favorite cartoon, Callie and Arizona both smiled, surprised to see the blinks of Olivia's huge dark brown eyes had already begun to become more frequent, lids with long raven eyelashes becoming heavier by the second.

"_It looks like you're tucked in tight snug in your bed, but tomorrow is chasing today through your head," _Callie softly sang, joining in with her eldest daughter. "_Will you climb the highest mountaintop, or will you paint a masterpiece? Go ride a bronco in the rodeo or wow the crowd on your trapeze?" _

By this point Sofia had stopped singing, her own eyes becoming heavy as Callie and Arizona took over the reins, their joined voices working wonders at putting their precious little girls to sleep. "_Princess, doctor, author, astronaut. From jungles dark to oceans deep. You'll do anything go anywhere. . ."_

Both women trailed off, Callie's strong embrace now supporting both Sofia and Olivia from where Sofia's smaller arms had gone slack with sleep. "They're perfect," Callie whispered, unable to take her eyes off their daughters.

Arizona found herself lost in the sight of all three of her girls snuggled up together and, as her eyes welled with tears, she sent a silent prayer of thanks up to God or whoever was listening that she was given another chance to be there with her family to share in such a beautiful moment.

* * *

_**(Arizona's POV)**_

_It's so hard to believe that Olivia is already a month old and that we finally have her home with us, but yet in that period of only four weeks, so much has happened, starting with the fateful afternoon I came home to find my pregnant wife unconscious on our bedroom floor. Of course, that tragic day led to the birth of our second daughter, Olivia, but beyond that, it was the day I finally realized just how incomplete my life would be without my wife. Without my Calliope, without Sofia, without Olivia, and it's a moment that I will carry with me for the rest of my life. _

_In that moment, as I knelt over my wife administering life sustaining CPR, I knew without a doubt that if anything happened to either Callie or Olivia on that day, I wouldn't make it alone. I'd never be able to carry on and give Sofia the life she deserved without having her other mother right there with me, at my side right where she belonged. I would have tried, but I know deep down that Calliope is the other half that makes me whole. She is my soul mate and, in that moment, on that very day, the thought of losing her yet again became unfathomable. _

_I couldn't let that happen. _

_What had we done to deserve this? Callie and I had already been through so much. We had struggled, and we had failed. We'd slipped and faltered. We'd lost, and we had broken but, in the end, we were healed and had been for years. We'd done things in the past that neither of us was proud of, but we had forgiven. _

_So, why was this happening to us? Why were we forced to face such harrowing events yet again? Why were we forced to revisit the darkest period of our life together?_

_I have no answers to any of those questions but, what I do know is our entire lives came crashing down around us once again. But, this time, we didn't flounder. We didn't break. We didn't hesitate. We didn't even stutter step. We behaved in the way we always should have in the face of discontent and, knowing we finally worked as a team, that we finally were able to talk to one another openly and honestly in order to stand up to such a test of our relationship, our marriage, and our family, was the greatest feeling in the world. _

_Maybe it just took us longer to achieve such a victory in our marriage, maybe Callie and I were just slow learners. I'm not sure, but what I am sure of is. . .we've finally made it. We've finally accomplished that allusive thing that we all say we want in our lives, but often refuse to do what it takes to achieve it. We are finally in a place of contentment because we finally found. . .clarity. _

_Because clarity is what we create for ourselves even in the darkest of times. It's not a matter of chance, but. . .a decision, something we create for ourselves. Clarity is what helps us commit one hundred percent to the things we love. It's what we seek to make sense in this world when everything is a jumbled mess. Clarity is what we strive for to make our lives complete. _

* * *

**AN: **The John Mayer song Callie turned into a lullaby is called _Something Like Olivia, _and Sofia's song is called _Good Night Olivia, _a song that Olivia the pig sings at the end of every episode of season two of the cartoon.

**AN: **Next up, this story's sequel entitled, _Perfectly Imperfect_.


	12. Author's Note

Just a little note to let you know the first chapter of _Perfectly Imperfect_, the sequel to _Clarity_, has now been posted to this site. Thanks so much for your continued interest in my work, and HAPPY GREY'S DAY! Tonight's episode is going to be INTENSE! #TGIT


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